I've been with my girlfriend for some months now and sexually it goes really well. We haven't tried actual intercourse, we're taking it slow because we're both virgins. I'm 25 and she is 19. We usually mastorbate or perform oral sex on each other. The Trouble for me is that I just can't seem to come. I get so much pleasure if she licks me or gives me a handjob but I just can't get over de edge. The strange thing is when I finish it I only need a few strokes to come.
It's really frustrating for her, she really comes like a rocket and it gives such an satisfaction and is a huge torn-on when you see and hear your partner come. Is it a mind thing? or something else? Thoughts en comments are most welcome.
i'll go with 'mind thing' also. consider this-before you become sexually active with another person, you are usually just masturbating. when you live with your parents, then dorm/roommates you condition yourself to come quick and 'get it over with' before anyone interrupts you, so understandably, when you're with someone sexually at first, your sexual response cycle is still conditioned to you (your hand/sock/etc.). so just relax, get used to her and yourself responding to her. don't worry about coming. it'll happen. :D
I'd go with "mind thing" assuming her technique is on the mark, so to speak. I'd hope that if it's simply that she hasn't found the right grip or whatever, you'd not be shy about coaching her.
I'm hesitant to suggest what the "mind thing" might be... a big possibility is that at some level the idea of experiencing an orgasm at her hand or mouth is "not right." I remember being with a woman for a while who insisted she wanted to get me off orally, but I didn't believe her (long story LOL). As a result, she never did manage to achieve it. I've also been in situations my partner's ministrations were so pleasurable I didn't want to cum and have her stop!
I don't know that I'd suggest you try to figure out what it is that's causing you to "hold back." (That might actually cause additional anxiety.) Relax, think horny thoughts, keep telling yourself that you deserve to cum. Don't get caught in the trap of trying to cum, either. Cumming is a very natural thing, you just have to allow it to happen.
Wally