Different places say different things, but the most recent article that I have read said that it should be when you turn 21 or first have sex (whichever comes first). I know Brandye always says that you should get one BEFORE you have sex to make sure everything is ok.

If your afraid of what your parents might think, just take it upon yourself to schedule an appointment. I didn't want my parents to think I was suffering from an STI (my mom has this crazy paranoia about me getting and STI), so I called my doc, made an appointment and when I went it I just made the copay and told the doctor what was going on.

I believe my sister did the same thing when she first started having sex. Didn't want my mom to know so she went and did it all on her own.

If you don't have health insurance go to your school health office since part of your enrollment fees are for health services. They should be able to point you in the right direction.

Another thing to note. A gyno exam is not to test for STI's. Its to make sure that everything is okay. There can be a load of problems with your body and you could never know it.

Here is some further reading to help educate you on everything

http://www.sexinfo101.com/forum/sexual-health-women/11602-your-first-pel...

First of all; I think that if you want to have a pelvic exam than your doctor should make that possible for you! It may take some stepping up for yourself, but you have a right to any reassurance that you need. If you can't find a gynecologist yourself, perhaps ask your local physician? Do they have sexual education or family planning centres where you live? They could perhaps refer you.

What Ducy has said is right. Also that it may differ each country. In what country do you live, dear anamiagal? Where I live it is almost impossible to consult a specialist, gynecologist included, without a referral by your local physician. Pelvic exams and pap-smeres are done at a local physician. It's considered unusual here to have such a preventive exam until you hit 35.

Personally I find it appalling (sp?) That a doctor would deny such a procedure. I mean if I'm over 18 and I want a doctor to do a full blood panel to check my bodys endocrine system then they sure as hell better do it. If my 15 year old doctor wanted a pelvic exam, and the doc refused to do it "because its uneccesary" then id have her at another doctor before he could even click his pen.

To me that would be like the docs who told me my testicular pain was "no big deal" and then I find out later that its epididymitis and it has the potential to leave me infertile. So they're opinion of "no big deal" vs my "this is excruciating and I can't shower without it hurting, something is wrong" didn't really pan out in their favor.

Another aspect of having an appointment to visit the doctor is to just have a chat and get any questions or concerns answered. This is also the time to discuss contraceptives.** So, begin by talking to your school's health office and get information and referrals from the staff.

** If you want to have intercourse and not worry about becoming a mother, then look out for and protect A#1--you. Do not rely upon someone else for your protection! If the person you have intercourse with does not want to become a father, he must always (not sometimes) wear a condom in order to protect A#1--himself. Then together the two of you should employ a third line of protection such as a spermicide.

You have options for your protection be it the pill, patch, or barrier method. Discuss all this with the doctor during your visit. On of the questions you should probably get an answer to is the condition and makeup of your hymen. For example, is it intact, partially intact, or, has it eroded away; if there is it thick or thin, and where is the opening so you know where to place the tip of the penis for easier penetration.

Here is some reading material for you:

I'm Ready for SEX! (or am I?) I really want to do it.

I (we) need help getting started...

What Can I/We Do To Prepare For First Time Intercourse?
PART 2--Another view of the same question.
A Boy's Concern For Making the First Time Successful and Fulfilling

Because relationships are partnerships, I recommend that both you and your boyfriend read these articles, discuss what you have learned, and add the information to what each of you already knows. Knowledge is empowering. Making love is not what we do to each other; rather, what we do with and for each other in partnership. In fact, I recommend that the two of you familiarize yourself with the Index found at the top of the main screen and read all of the other articles listed.

I hope this is of help. Got questions?

-doc

ALL WOMEN SHOULD HAVE COMPLETE GYN EXAMS BEFORE BECOMING ACTIVE!!!!! Read around. There is a sticky, with discussion, on your first exam and what to expect. We recommend that all 16 yo's have a gyn exam to ensure that all is developing properly. In this day with the guidelines for Gardasil, this is sometimes done earlier and the HPV inoculations are done. You are still eligible for these in many countries (each nation has its own guidelines for this).

The gyn exam is not just for diseases. It is also to ascertain proper development. If some conditions are identified, they can be corrected (usually very easily) before they become problems. Many GPs (family doctors) will do these exams and only refer if something is amiss. Most campuses have clinics in which these are standard. All major cities have women's health clinics in which these are done.

The exam is really quite simple and not too uncomfortable. The worst part is getting in the stirrups. In most cases, the exam consists more of talking than actually doing anything. Have the exam.

Talk to your doctor. If you absolutely affirm that you are virgin, Gardasil is still useful. Each nation has its own guidelines, some stopping at 16 and some later (I believe individual states in the US have different laws from one another), but individual doctors may be cooperative. Alternative approaches would be through local women's health centres or clinics.

Just curious...did your mom say you didn't need a polio vaccine when you were younger? Sory but she sound like an idiot. Does she not understand that she is helping to prevent cervical cancer? If someone said "Collin this shot will prevent lung cancer" Id sure as hell take it even if I never planned on smoking. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.

There is no "laws" regarding getting a pelvic exam here in the US. Your 21. You can go get one, and its ILlegal for the doctors to tell your parents. It is ILLEGAL for them to release ANY of your visit information with your parents. When I got my ultrasound back (they were checking for possible growths after my epidydimitis) they called and ABSOLUTELY REFUSED to tell my parents anything, even though the doc and my mother were very close friends.

Slow down, Ducy. There have been some growing pains with this medication ranging from misinformation, not following thru with the second and third inoculations in the series, mothers not comfortable giving the medication to preteens for a medical condition available thru sex, etc. There have even been some scares when people have died.

The o/p should discuss the medication with her doctor at the time of her visit.

Its irrelevant if your mother doesn't believe in pre marital sex. Gardisil vaccinates against (4?) Strands of HPV shown to cause cervical cancer. You could wea a chastity belt till marraige and your husband could give you hpv on your wedding night. I forget the number but by the age of 50 the odds of having HPV is insanely high.

My whole point of the polio comment wwas that you really can't "know" when, if ever, you'll get polio. But why risk not protecting yourself? Like I said, your husband could get it and give it to you, since there are usually no symptoms.