I've been with my girlfriend for about four months now and I want her to give me a blowjob, but she refuses. We like to fool around by making out and her giving me a handjob and me fingering her. I've gone down on her a few times and she loved it, but she won't return the favor. She did once, but I came within about a minute (:( ); since then, she has flat out refused to do it again. She's keeps telling me that she about gagged on my penis since it is so big (she thinks so, I don't). She won't let me go down on her anymore since she sees it as unfair since she has no intention of returning the favor.
She is terrible at handjobs. Having sex for the first time is a big deal to her, since we're both still virgins; I don't press the issue of sex. Her handjobs are terrible, sometimes painful, and she obviously won't have sex with me, so I see a blowjob as a sort of compromise. I've done everything I can think of to get her to. Is there anything I can do, or might this be a lost cause?
Thanks.
hint hint practise makes perfect... basically if u do it once then give up you wont achieve anything.. success takes time and so does mastering the skill of deep throat. (being a guy myself i am lucky my gf knows this. lol)
it will take time. re-assure her you dont mind her trying as such and will support her through succeeding rather than just getting off
You should also work w/ her on her HJ technique if its awful and painful. Tell her what feels good. Sounds like you are both young and have a lot of learning to do... but you'll never know you are doing anything wrong if no one tells you.... but dont say it in a mean way... just say like. i like it when you do it this way... or that way.
And if a girl isn't comfortable giving a BJ there is no way you can "make" her or "convince" her... until she is ready.
Some are never ready... some love doing it... we are all different.
[QUOTE=demonbuttercup;155617]You should also work w/ her on her HJ technique if its awful and painful. Tell her what feels good. Sounds like you are both young and have a lot of learning to do... but you'll never know you are doing anything wrong if no one tells you.... but dont say it in a mean way... just say like. i like it when you do it this way... or that way.
.[/QUOTE]
Very true. She has no clue how bad she is at handjobs. If he doesn't tell her then her next boyfriend will endure penile pain as well. And the boyfriend after that, and the one after that, etc.
[QUOTE=ua322;155646]Very true. She has no clue how bad she is at handjobs. If he doesn't tell her then her next boyfriend will endure penile pain as well. And the boyfriend after that, and the one after that, etc.[/QUOTE]
No, she knows that she isn't very good. I've told her to stop quite a few times and even told her what she is doing wrong, but it still isn't very good.
WEll, a BJ doesn't ONLY mean sticking your penis into her mouth like it was her Vagina.
get her to lick the shaft or the head.
One thing I always do is take a shower before..no-one wants to put their mouth and nose somewhere sweaty and smelly.
[QUOTE]One thing I always do is take a shower before..no-one wants to put their mouth and nose somewhere sweaty and smelly.[/QUOTE]
depends on who you are.... me n my gf are quite comfortable with anything as it is natures coarse... that and you do not really notice the sweat or smell once you start....
each to their own...
Trust is key.
i dont no much but i do know that trust is needed in this type of situations, talk to her why she doesnt want to do it and build up from there.
[QUOTE=bobo32;155600]She did once, but I came within about a minute
[/QUOTE]
Sounds to me that she doesnt like cum in her mouth.
Try and work around that, and ask if she will give you a blowjob up until before you climax, or get her to finish you off by hand when near climax. Half of women wont have cum in their mouth so respect her wishes. Would you want cum in your mouth? I think not.
With the hand jobs, try lubes and get her to experiment with techniques. She wont know how bad she is unless you tell her. Communication is key so tell her what you like.
I've told her that she doesn't have to just stick it in her mouth and I've told her that I won't cum in her mouth (if I could help it), but she just gets upset whenever I even bring up the subject.
As far as trust goes, she trusts me enough to let me go down on her. I've tried to talk to her about it, but she just gets upset.
Well from a girl's point of view, it can taste horrible sometimes, if she didn't like the taste and it made her gag then that probably wudv'e put her off alot, but you could always let her do it like lick it and suck it abit but make her stop b4 you come, then you get pleasure and she doesn't hurl! well just suggest it, and as for the handjobs, poor u! duno what to say about that.
Ok, you have talked about it, discussed it, tried it.
Give up and move on.
Why? Because she sees no reason to change and doesn't care to. If she cared, she'd try to get it - it is just a knack. The more pressure you put on her, the worse and more resentful she's going to feel. You feel bad and unsatisfied and she feels resentful and is firmly convinced that masturbating you and fellatio are icky and she's bad at it anyway so why bother? Great relationship you have there - NOT.
So say goodbye now, tell her kindly why, and move on. No blame here - you're just not a true match.