well just relax if you can trust him as it seems you can then just remember he wouldn't want to hurt you, if you havn't spent much intimate time together then how about just having a night together (in bed) with the sole objective of being together and not aim at anymore to help build your confidence. not that I'm much of an expert though you can be sure there will be a few more suggestions any time soon

Yah...I kinda agree with newlove there....have an evening of some nice back rubs...and he can give you a really really good foot massage...then some quality "snuggle" time in bed...and see how things heat up....snuggle time doesn't have to end up in screwing!!..LOL..just lots of kisses and touches and hugging..and heck who knows what GOOD good "cum" out of that!!...cheers!!

pun intended I take it luvs2plzu yea that was exactly what I meant don't go straight for the whole (at least intentionaly) deal just spent time together

I'll go along with all of the above recommendations, also.

Nervousness can stem from several conditions such as:
* lack of self esteme
* lack of confidence
* fear of the unknown
* anxiety

From your description it sounds like you may be anxious with some fear of the unknown. Am I correct or have I made an incorrect assumption?

Practicing builds confidence by reducing the unknowns and building familiarity. Anxiety can be reduced as noted in the above replies by just moving along slowly, without demand or expectation, in order to become comfortable with each new step in the process.

Have you identified the source of your nervousness? Have you told him?

> Me and my boyfriend were on the verge of having sex the other night, ...I'm definately comfortable with him, but this would be the first time me and him have been "together".

What do you mean? Is this the first time the two of you have made out, or, to see and touch each other's genitals, or, do you mean the fiirst time you expect to have intercourse?

If by "together" you mean making out, then please read what I have to say about how to make out by doing an advanced search using my name and the key word "inclusive". Just take it long and slow and spend several sessions
at each stage or "base", like kissing and caressing above the shoulder, the upper torso excluding breasts, and then entire body excluding genitals and breasts. How fast and how far you progress is pretty much up to you because as the woman you set the boundaries. You are also free to extend the limits of how far the two of you will go at any time. You can read more on what I have to say on this by doing a search on "implied consent" or "limits".

Then, again, if by "together" you mean having intercourse for the first time, then work up to it in steps, instead of taking the plunge all at once. If he has seen and touched your genitalia, then as the first step, you can move on to more familiarity. Have him finger the area surrounding the entrance to your vagina. Once you are comfortable with these caresses, invite him to go just inside and do the same, perhaps dipping rather than dunking several times in the beginning.

If you have an intact hymen, he can attempt to slip a finger past it if it only partially obstructs the passageway. If he can do this, then let him slip a finger inside and just rest it there or perhaps do some light stroking if this action does not cause any discomfort, and going no further until you are comfortable with what he is doing. Of course, the same holds true if your hymen has eroded away or has been previously torn.

If you are concerned about first intercourse and possible pain, then know that this is a probability and just go slow. There is an exercise you can do during the several days prior to this event that will make the hymen and the opening more complient. Do an advanced search using my name and the key word "tub" or bathtub". Plan to use the woman superior position the first couple of times. You can search for the whys on this, also.

Finally, if by "together" you mean that this is the first time for the two of you, although not you, then your fears are irrational. The solution is to go back to the top of this and just go slowly and in steps. Making love is serious business; however, where couples often get into trouble is by taking the process too seriously. Ya just gotta know that this is a process of exploration and learning together and that stuff sometimes happens so that things do not go as planned. Neither of you must make a big deal about this and just laugh them off and go on.

I've covered a lot of possibles in this reply, not knowing what is the source of your nervousness, and also because a lot of other people will be reading this thread who may have the same or one of the other concerns addressed in this. I hope this is of help. Got questions?

Nervousness usually resolves itself. Taking things slowly and deliberately will help.

hm well he should try as much foreplay as possible so if you have experienced all this what exactly are you nervous about ? you should follows docs advice on loosening up if you are worried about it being tight and hurting see if he can get his fingers in (with the use of lube)

[QUOTE=dhj27;154100]What I meant was that this would be the first time we were considering intercourse.

We've both seen eachothers bodies completely, we know what eachother look like as well as feel like.

Both of us have been sexually active with other people, just not with eachother yet.

I think that my nervousness comes mostly from the fear of being in control, since i've never had the chance to before, and also, since we haven't had sex with eachother that I think I might not be good enough for him.

I guess its a whole bunch of stuff just clouding my head.

The night that we were going to have sex, I told him I was too nervous, and then he thought that I wasn't comfortable around him, because in his eyes, not being comfortable goes with being nervous.

He told me that if I don't want to have sex with him, that I don't have to, but I really do, he also told me that he wouldn't judge me or anything like that and I believe him, because I know he wouldn't.

We cuddle all the time, kiss, makeout, and all that, we just want to take our relationship to the next level.[/QUOTE]

Here's my two cents:

Tell him that you will be happy to learn how to be "in control" as you two become comfortable together. However, for the first time, you are too nervous to do that and you want him to take the initiative.

Problem solved.

If he has a problem with that then you have other issues besides sex to worry about.