There are many questions here about “fingering,” “rubbing.” etc, when playing with girlfriends’ genitals. Perhaps both men and women here would be interested in some facts regarding what is euphemistically called “female sexual response.” There are chapters and sites that describe total response in great detail – mask on the face, blushing on upper chest, nipple erection, myotonia (muscle tensing) and so on. These things are all real but differ greatly among women. Here is a description of what is going on in your (her) genitals.
Firstly, the action is not inside the vagina. There are no nerve endings in there or childbirth would be excruciating. What is felt is pressure on the vulva, the labia and, even, some internal organs. “Feeling him come,” is accurate but not the way we think it is. We do not feel the ejaculate squirting into us; what we feel, sometimes, is the throbbing of the penis against our outer parts. This does not mean that we do not have a sense of “depth” but it is from other responses than feeling the penis in the sheath we provide.
But, you ask, “What about the G Spot?” The G Spot is not medically documented. OK, I know I have one but it eludes complete medical explanation. Probably the best explanation, scientifically, is that there is a ligament running behind where we describe the G Spot. This is being pushed around, gently, and causing response, including moving the urethra and, even, the hood of the clitoris. The G Spot is one of those elusive things that is as much faith as science. It takes regular partners a while to make it really work.
So, let’s forget about physically pleasing women with fingers stimulating her vagina. A quarter inch does as much as three inches penetration. The pleasant feelings are on the labia, not inside. The clitoris is the focus. And you men will be amazed to know that we often feel assaulted on this little protuberance rather than stimulated. She includes all the nerve endings that the penis has scrunched into a really small bundle.
Now, what is happening with all this stuff as we become stimulated. The labia become engorged with blood. This causes opening or spreading of the vulva. “Opening like a flower,” is a beautiful description. Everything that becomes exposed is usually neatly closed within and protected from stimulation. Unlike the penis which is battered by pants seams and other external jolts all day, our stuff is bundled up, hidden away and protected from external stimulus. So, when exposed this a very sensitive area with all the now shiny and damp surfaces picking up every touch and movement. The engorgement of the area makes it even more sensitive because everything feels full and slightly distended. Be gentle.
While the labia spread open they become lubricated and “receptive”. And give access to the clitoris as well as the vaginal opening. Here is the complicated part. The clitoris goes through three distinct phases in arousal. It starts out well hidden and protected under its hood. As the area becomes engorged with blood, the clitoris becomes erect, the same as a penis. At this point, we are all different and care must be taken or the game is over. Some remain covered with just the tip peeping out; some become larger and quite exposed. The part that is exposed is very sensitive and can barely tolerate direct stimulation in many women. As orgasm approaches and the clitoris becomes hyper-sensitive, she actually retracts. She is not losing the erection, but the entire organ is retracted into the body. This is a confusing thing to the unexperienced. The clitoris is at her most sensitive but more pressure and rigorous treatment is needed simply because the clitoris has sought “protection.”
Just as the penis loses erection, at least partially, immediately after ejaculation, the entire genital area of the woman begins to "resolve” after orgasm – the blood is going about its business elsewhere and the distention disappears. The clitoris loses erection, the labia get small and the vulva closes over everything returning to its “natural” state. The entire body relaxes.
This now becomes more personal experience than medical fact because each woman is unique and the way we move through the stages of response may differ greatly from one time to another. Assuming a nice session of hugging, kissing, breast play, and general getting ready, when you reach into my crotch, I spread without thinking. Start with your whole hand covering the entire pubic area. And rub gently and firmly and then take my lead. Maybe I will be in the mood for some finger dipping; maybe not; my movements will tell you because I may not even know what I want next. While the clitoris is erect, do not assault her; a finger on either side moving the hood up and down will probably be enough. When I really arch up, then pressure with a finger can be tolerated and I am looking for more.
While male sexual response is just as complicated, what is wanted is more obvious and easily supplied. Women are confusing to ourselves as well as to men. A hard suck on the head of the penis will bring the same reaction in most men. A firm tongue flick across the clitoris may have unpredictable consequences.
Women have more subtle responses and so tend to be more subtle in our treament of men, leaving them a bit unsatisfied; men are less subtle in their responses and often rush to the wrong things – such as jamming a finger into us or battering the clitoris, leaving us a bit unsatisfied.
Because we are so different, I am certain that many women will add to this and there may be as much dialogue among women as between women and men. There is much to be learned from “masturbating” one another. The responses can be seen; communication can be verbal as well physical. It is great fun, can give great orgasms and no one will get pregnant!
how much pressure do you apply to the g-spot...im just worried that i will hurt her...thanks for any advise
(This post/topic was merged with an existing topic by the moderator)
well, im a girl, and when i've found mine i don't really think it feels too much different...although i find it weird that some ppl can't find theirs, or their partner can't find theirs...i think it easiest if you put your middle finger in and reach up as far as you can with just that finger, then kind of as if you were rubbing her clit with one finger, rub the g-spot...it's kind of the other side of the clit...on the inside...or did i just make that more confusing
well, it's always been relatively easy for me and 'my partners' to find...maybe the level of feeling from it is different for everyone and you don't notice much of a difference when it is stimulated
Bottom line: no medical proof that it even exists; thank god mine has been located!
For some women, there it is; for some, it is hard to find and for others it will never be there. Faith more than science.
Girlygirl.
Another (reasonable) myth. The Skene's glands are a closer analogy to the prostate in that they do make and secrete juices. But then he Skene's glands provide essentially nothing else. The G Spot, which I believe in, is not anatomical at all. The most clear description is that it feels like a little rough knob. We just cannot find it! So enjoy the benefits, if you are among the lucky to have "found yours," and do not worry about the science on what feels so good.
(Edited by Brandye at 6:22 pm on Oct. 6, 2002)
The G-spot is the best... it makes me weak at the knees... *sighs dreamily*
I thought that it had been determined that the G-spot was a less developed version of the prostate. Is that just a myth or an unproven theory?
Seven Horses,
OK, I have got one. I know that because my girlfriend and I really hunted and each found the result. Very few women with whom I have discussed this have "found" theirs.
Now, step into the lab with me and address the cadaver laid out on the table. Using palpation, scalpel, observation or whatever technique you wish, identify the G Spot. Medically, it is not there; functionally, I am sure glad I have one! More specifically, I am very glad that Aoife and I had the patience to really work on finding "it" or the result.
is finding the g spot difficult? like if youve got a finger in there and u run across it will you know when youve hit it?
My bf and I have tried so many times to find mine and I can't. It's not that weird.
Hi there.
I remember reading once that it depends on how thick your skin tissue separating your GSpot and the inside of your vagina (sorry, I don't know the technical name for this area) is. The thicker the tissue, the harder it is to find (or maybe the harder you need to press).
J
Brandeye, that has to be about the best post on every damned one of these boards. I thank you greatly for letting us all know that. I was informed of alot of stuff there. I think that should be part of sex-ed. Or at least have info like that! Penis > Vagina does not work for most people. It's people like you that know this is being read by kids and adults alike and still post the same information that make the sex-world what it is. That is my opinion.
You forgot:
[QUOTE=Quote ]The G Spot is one of those elusive things that is as much faith as science. It takes regular partners a while to make it really work.[/QUOTE]
and that "each woman is different and responds differently"
I don't believe in the G-spot,personally. But I know someday I may be proven wrong.
[QUOTE=Quote ]The G Spot is not medically documented.[/QUOTE]
Sorry. I'd argue you that. Not to mention it varies with females regarding where it is. Typically it's approximatly 1-2 inches in from the outside of the vagina.
I'd have to give it to her....she did a wonderful job of teaching those who didn't know, and a reminder for those who did.
I have had my share of intimate relationships with women, and what she says is true: Not all women have one. For those who do an orgasm is amazing. For those who don't or haven't found it yet are missing out on a little bit of something. I have been able to find it in a couple of my girlfriends, but alas, have yet to find it in myself.
But it sure is fun trying!
Does anyone know of a good place to find a diagram of this. Ive seen the medical 7th grade sex-ed maps. But what about one devoted to sex that explains what is where and how it feels to the woman. Anyone got sumthin like that??
[QUOTE=Quote (xx22xx @ Jan. 09 2003,12:56)]well, im a girl, and when i've found mine i don't really think it feels too much different...although i find it weird that some ppl can't find theirs, or their partner can't find theirs[/QUOTE]
thats the point, maybe you didn't find yours. we all have no problem inserting a finger and finding that "spongy" type area towards the upper front of the vagina. from what brandye said if you dont feel anything extra special then maybe you didn't find your g-spot. i mean for me if i stimulate that area i just feel like i have to pee. i dont know if ive ever had an actual g-spot stimulated orgasm...all i know is that some areas dont feel as good as others and so i move or tilt my pelvis to a certain degree and well then it just hits the spot so to speak and i have an extremely pleasurable orgasm. im not sure if it was my g-spot all i know is that it felt good. i try not to worry about the science and technical stuff i just enjoy what i have. sometimes when you dissect something too much it loses its mystery.
like if i masturbate and just have clitoral stimulation to orgasm its good but nothing like when im having good sex.
http://sexinfo101.com/pw_gspot.shtml
that's the place to go to help with better tips on finding it...
...and yes, the tips DO work. Just last night I was reading them on how to find it and what do ya know but I hit paydirt.
I am one of those women that does not reach orgasm from penetration alone. I have spent a lot of time (by myself and with men) trying to cure that problem. It was actually beginning to frustrate me...
..anyway, the tips work. last night you betcha I found it and I think it is most important for the other females in this string who have said they found a sore spot, a mushy spot, keep searching. You will definately know when you find the right spot.
i have a picture and its great but i dont know how to post it here ...sorri...leave E-mail and ill email it to you
Best post on the subject I've ever seen...
Thanks for the insight... and here I thought you were supposed to play inside...
I myself with my boyfriend found my G - Spot not long back, it drives me insane when my boyfriends rubbing it faster and faster. Working together I always come while having sex now, its great rubbing your clit while having sex.
^ and when your bf found it or even went over it did you notice or did it take time to notice it?
hello there! its my first post here and I think I like it here coz everyone is matured and honest...... I hope so! Anyway about this g-spot thing. I have a girlfriend and we have sex constantly. I read an article that says that in order to please a girl you have to overcome the g-spot and it also says that fingering helps..... Honestly I don't want to do that to my girl, I know that this my sound stupid but are there any other ways of dealing with the g-spot aside from my finger.....
well its not that I don't like it, but whenever I do it she always tells me that she might have an infection or something. Although we usually wash ourselves first before having sex. I think shes just scared.....
For my girl the g-spot is pretty solid. It's a spot inside her that's right behind her clit. I don't know, maybe that's not it. All I know is it's really ridged and when I press or rub it she grabs me really tightly and tries to hold me there.
hopefully someone will reply...
I think I have the Spot but it is not as most described it. Its devinatley rigged but not spongy, its real obvious when u find but it feels more like a tube. Nonetheless with ALOT of pressure it gives alot of back-scratching orgasms. For my girl rubbing it does next to nothing, only teases her. Anyway could the tube thing be IT?
if you cannot find her g-spot you might want to check under the bed.... tee hee i sooooo funny
I think a lot of people miss the point that just because you have located the little spongy round area doesn't mean you have found the Gspot.
Anyone can find the spongy ball, I mean its kinda hard to miss lol.
My b/f has rubbed me there and it does nothing for me.
Im not into wasting my time on finding something that MAY or MAYNOT be found.
It fun to explore every now and then, but not to dwell on it.
About the location (again). I've had no problems finding the g-spot on my earlier partners but I couldn't find it in my current one. A few days ago I was between her legs giving her oral, and just when she started pulling my hair to get me on her and my dick in her, I found the familiar texture, but it was more like 0.15 inches than 1.5 inches inside her. In the heat of the moment I didn't have time to explore more, so I can't be certain it was the g-spot.
The questions: Could it have been it? Could it appear only when she is hot enough, cause I had missed it many times before, and it was right there.
I need help, if I work the clit then I can usually please her in like 5-10 mins surprisingly today I manage to do it in like 3 lol. Anyways the G-Spot I rub I think... and it doesn't do much for her. Like I go around the spongy surface and ask her if it feels good or bad, and she says its not great. Like does it take a lot of stimulation?
Hello there people. Nice forum. I would like to as kone question. I am trying to pleasure my girlfriend and make her have an orgasm. I have read and applyied all of the information about the G-spot and the clitoris etc....through experience I have learned my share of stuff....the only thing I dont understand is that when I give her oral pleasure, when it seems she is having the big O, she tells me to stop because she cannot make it. Now my question is: should at that point stop, continue or insert my pennis into her vagina at this peak moment? If none of the above, could someone give me a tunning tip based on the above facts? If anyone needs more info on the sittuation I will give ..... but PLEASE help me to help her!I am not a woman to know
Hello everyone,
We're new to the board, and as yet cannot start a new topic, but this question sort of falls under this heading.
Has anybody heard of TWO G-spots? My lady has the typical spot right where it should be....and another slightly more sensitive one much farther in, right up by the cervix, still on the front of her vagina.
Has anyone else here found or heard of this second G-spot?
Look at the two bodies. Imaging the penis just entering the vagina only 2 inches. No more. The shape of the penis is such that it does beautiful things to the G spot.
Listen up you Guys. Get a Gal excited enough and only enter the vagina to the penis head goes pass the g spot over and over again rythenically and you'll get it. DCon't enter all the way until she begs for it or you can tell she is well into the climax.
Doesn't take a brain surgeon.
The problem is that most guys don't know how to excite a woman. Put the penis in and get her excited with it and you'll climax to soon for her.
So the answer is to learn how to really get her breathing heavy with excitment. You will find th g spot easily that way. It'll be there. You'll see.
Forplay. Yup. Kath
Ok for those of you who have had success with finding and stimulating this thing...how long did it take for her to have an orgasme?
[QUOTE=Quote (Me333 @ Aug. 20 2004,06:03)]ok my girlfriend and i have experimented with each other and she has by herself, and she says the ridged are starts right inside and goes back an inch about. When I felt her i felt a rasied ridged area right inside her. When I was puching on it she also said that it felt like she had to pee. Is this it? It wasn't very far in...[/QUOTE]
Could well be.
Cheers,
Ringo
ok my girlfriend and i have experimented with each other and she has by herself, and she says the ridged are starts right inside and goes back an inch about. When I felt her i felt a rasied ridged area right inside her. When I was puching on it she also said that it felt like she had to pee. Is this it? It wasn't very far in...
Definately massage the g-spot when giving oral sex. The only negative consquence is that your girl will be out for a while.
Does anyone know any good sexual positions that will allow me to hit her g-spot with my penis during intercourse?
Brandye this was an excellent thread you started so I am brining it back to life.
My G-spot was found ages ago by my husband and its great when he rubs it just right and I am in the right mood.
I recently found it by sitting in a chair using a vibrator with a curved head. Made for the G-spot. But I never liked it because it didn't work really. I was laying on my back. This time I was in the chair and I shocked myself when I found it. All I can say was good thing I was sitting on a blanket because I got very wet.
whats up ladies and gents. I recently have stumbled over this great website, and have been reading the post on the message board latley. I have just recently learnd about the G-spot. My girlfriend and I have been experimenting and I am sure I have found the G-spot ( it is ridged and not smooth) anyway when I make any movment or play with her there it does not seem to effect her. Is there something I am doing wrong, any advice would be very much apprciated. thanks
N-I-C-K-A-TINA
While having oral sex one night my husband slid a finger in and applied pressure, it felt like it was directly behind the clitoris, that combined with his fabulous tongue gave me the most earth shattering ORGASM I have ever had in my life. I assume that must have been the G spot because I have never felt anything like it in my life and will make sure he does it again and again!!!!!! Don't be afraid to explore the inner depths, you may find more than you ever dreamed!!!!
WOOHOO thanks everyone i found it! I knew i did when afterwards my girlfriend looked at me and said, "how did you do that?" It was actually quite easy to find and feels very different from the rest of the tissue inside the vagina. So if you haven't found it yet guys and girls keep looking cause i guarantee you it brings great satisfaction to both of the partners.
YES!! that's the spot, it is not her bladder. the spot may feel somewat spongy like as well, that is the spot. the only reason she feels like she wants to pee is because she is not use to hte feeling...continuing stimulation and pressure there will most definietly feel better for her and the peeing feeling will definietly dissapear and turn into a g-spot orgasm.
good luck
I dont think the g spot is really that hard to find. Just have to know where and what to look for. goto the main website and it tells exactly where its at, i learned from my g/f's cousin who was a past g/f how to find it. I think all of us guys should learn where it is becouse it really has alot of impact on my g/f she cant even stand up straight if i stimulate it!
Here is a quote that explains what the gspot is and what it is that feels good:
"I'll leave out the scientific theories and just give some practical information. The female urethra runs along the front/top side of the vagina, between it and the pubic bone. In many women it is sensitive to firm strokes from inside the vagina which press it up against the pubic bone. The G-spot is supposed to be tissue surrounding the urethra, about 1 1/2 to 2 inches inside."
And a really good explanation on why some women are uncomfortable with the feelings:
"However, if it should turn out that these experts had underestimated the sexual capabilities of women's bodies by portraying pleasurable sexual activities like female ejaculation as abnormal and/or imagined, it could have a significant effect on women's views of their sexuality. If the new evidence about these expulsions demonstrated that they are natural sexual bodily functions then many women could be free of guilt and shame about expelling fluid during sex."
For more info check out the web site http://doctorg.com/ It is a great site that goes into great detail about the gspot and sites tests that were done to prove that FE exists and that it is not urine.
I think I've found mine, but I've never been brought to orgasm.
HELP!!!
It doesnt matter what I personally, or my b/f tries, I can't have an orgasm! I feel so deprived! Can anyone give me some tips as to how I can achieve one? I get the "pee" feeling, but nothing happens....it doesnt matter how long we go for, or what we do. I want one so badly! Im 19 and have never had an orgasm. I try not to concentrate on the fact that I want to have an orgasm when we are fooling around, or having sex, but thats definatly challenging. HELP!! please. And guys, if you can help too i'd much appreciate it! haha.
Me and my girlfriend just recently started having sex (we were both virgins previously). I have been some what saddened by the fact that i cant get her to orgasm during sex. I can however get her to reach this point through fingering techniques. But my one question is when i was attempting to find her G-spot (in hopes that if i could find with my fingers i could find with my penis) I found a rougher area that made her feel like she had to pee when i applied pressure. Is this just her bladder? I have read all the posts in this section to no avail. Could some one please help me out here?
I have a question for Brandye. My current girl-friend is someone I've known for over two years but we have been dating only six weeks. Her philosophy is that sexual intercourse is for marriage only and vows that she has never been with a man "that way." I don't have a problem with this phil. per say but during forplay (yes, I have made a little progress) she will not allow any form of penetration in the vaginal/anal area. Her reason? PAIN!! I've suggested seeing a doctor to see if any physical problem is present but she says she not only won't see a doctor but has never had a ob/gyn exam! And doesn't plan to. She never displays anger, just a lot of determination. Any suggestions as to what I might do to ease her fear?
for those who experianced a gspot orgasm, is the vagina sensitive afterwards like it is after a clitoris orgasm?
I wish mine could be found. I want to enjoy in truly mind shattering orgasms! Who doesn't? Maybe one day...
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