I do agree with what everyone has said so far.It is wrong to shame a child and make them confused about their bodies.I've always spoken to my children about their bodies in a way that they understood,but never shamed them.They have been taught that certain activities(masturbation) should never be discouraged,but instead be done in privacy.

I think that Nanny's advice is undoubtedly WRONG!

She is taking the easy road; continuing the shame inflicted in the parents and transferring it to the child.

It is important for children to learn how to love and be happy with their bodies and themselves. The only thing they need to learn is what is considered "appropriate" in our society. And you can teach children very well the difference between specific situations. And don't ever get mad on them when they accidentally misinterpreted the situation! It is the same balance as when punishing a child for bad behavior; the behavior was bad, not the child is bad. You still love him/her. The behavior was inappropriate, not his/her body. His/her body is beautiful! This way you will create people that are genuinely happy with themselves and can enjoy their bodies fully.

Otherwise; you are creating people that will suffer from this more or less. Just a "pretty picture" of what we all know so well: People that get ill, due to the fact they can't understand their own body and do not take care of it properly. People who start abusing their bodies in an attempt to "feel". People who take their shame towards "despise" of their own body and themselves. And than there are those who "simply" never learn the pleasure of sex. Etc, etc, etc...

Well done, Supernanny for contributing to this world! Thank you mam....

PS: Ducy, this was kinda the subject I meant for your paper! :) (posted in: http://www.sexinfo101.com/forum/other-sex-topics/29709-correlation-betwe...)

Fox? As my beloved eighth grade language arts and social studies teacher once said, " I suppose you expect me to be shocked, but when I consider the source I am not."
As responsible adults we must teach our children that adhering to certain social conventions in most cases can make life easier for everyone, but we should not be ashamed of our bodies. We humans are very intelligent animals. We can be told the truth about our bodies and sexual differences at an early age. That will cause no trauma. Making a child ashamed of his penis can and does cause trauma.
This is what happens when we allow free speech of even the most reactionary elements of society.

I still run out naked, whats wrong with that, well not now, its -20, but common, none of you ever went skinny dipping with friends at least, or lost a bet that you had to stand naked at the bar exit at closing time. calling it a pee pee thought I would be ashamed, hes not even allowed to be given the real vocabulary, whats gonna happen later on? "you wanna come play with my pee pee."

Way to go Ducy! Very good that you've managed to cut away from those lessons learned. That's a hard thing to do. Our upbringing gets stuck so deeply rooted in our core values and attitudes. Some just can't let go of them ever. You should be proud of yourself. And given your intentions on the upbringing of future children; I'm sure they'll do just fine! :)

SHR, who is the "none of you" you are referring to in your post?

Personally, I don't mind using a bit of children's speak when kids are young, as long as you don't use babytalk or belittle them. I don't have children myself (yet), but did do a lot of babysitting. The girls could ask me anything about life, death and everything in between. I just answered them based on their level of comprehension and making sure I'd verify what they knew and really wanted to know. Children are really adorable in the way they develop, grow and learn about the world :)

Off course parents can do whatever they like. I just don't oppose to children's speak, like some teletubbie-hating folks do ;) I do agree it is good for a kid's vocabulary to listen to all sorts of speak.

Between adults; sometimes words can make it just too serious or even harsh. Since I speak a different language, I can hardly comment on English. But my bf and I make a distinction between
-serious talk; for example when we're discussing my findings on natural family planning, we use serious terminology
-talk in the bedroom; in which we more like using common (nick)names to bodyparts; not too harsh, not too serious and a bit fun :)
-naughty talk outside; which is usually covered up with all kinds of ambiguous remarks, so that others won't even know what exactly we're talking about. Only when they listen carefully ;)

[QUOTE]
Way to go Ducy! Very good that you've managed to cut away from those lessons learned. That's a hard thing to do. Our upbringing gets stuck so deeply rooted in our core values and attitudes. Some just can't let go of them ever. You should be proud of yourself. And given your intentions on the upbringing of future children; I'm sure they'll do just fine![/QUOTE]

My mother was raised like this also, in a school run by nuns, her mother was considered a rebel or similar term for wearing pants, driving a car, telling people to f*** off, doing drugs and owning a wolf and a husky, also they are suppose to have children and she told the priest off, etc. My mother was left handed, so they beat her on the knuckles until she learned to use the right hand, she could write with both perfectly throughout her life. Now I didn't know about the part with the sexual restrictions, it explains a lot of things about her behavior to me.

For example, when we were children I remember them often being naked, and I'm thinking they did that for us, so we would be less shy towards ourselves perhaps. They never forced us to go to church, she loved God I believe, yet despised the church, which I forgot to mention, her mother commuted suicide and she just walked out of class and went home, she died in her arms, so you can imagine what they thought of her then, I can assure she was a creature of extraordinary kindness, she helped hundreds of family get back on there feet and get there lives back on track, that kind of stuff, except for me of course, I had to "learn" the value of money, my father owns a garage, at 13 I started working before and after school and summers, at 16 I was still a mechanic and in school and owned business's in publishing. I continued like this until a few years back, before passing away, she told me to stop working like this, my girlfriends of the time, they did love me very much, but without realizing, 2 weeks could go by and I was working without so much a phone call, to top it, I was always fascinated by sexuality since I am young, but never have been someone of easy approach or of indulgence (well until now that is). My mother would insult all the women that would come up from my room in the morning, some sort of freaky mother jealousy I never understood, perhaps its from her time in that school. Anyways needless to say I was nowhere close to having the satisfaction I desired, being in the porno industry, I had tons of materials to fill my mind, but knew none of my partners from then would find it attractive the way I did, and at that time, sex was only about them, what they thought was pleasuring me was in fact extremely repetitive, and me being the nice guy, I played along for years with different partners, among them even a prostitute that was great but hearthbreaking, and again not up to what my mind expected, yet I was not expecting to ever be satisfied, I knew a random willing partner would not satisfy me anyways, I figured this was standard for most men. Now before I proceed to the climax and moral of the story, few points on my old self where that I wasn't a happy smiley person, I worked often days in a row due to everything I had taken on, and wasn't planning on giving time for social calls, lots of people called me heartless, my mother included, but I was just responsible and direct, now my mother told me a few things that changed it all, my father was the same, she was going to leave us and he still had not realized he spent is days and evenings working to buy her things and it never ends, workworkwork, just like I had been for 10 years or so, she told me to just sell it and stop it, she knew I can easily make a living from home or small office hours. She made me swear to never again become what I had been, she saw that by having free time and simply staying at home, or like use it most of the time, friends and family will follow, and eventually, someone I could love back, makes about 5 years she passed away, only 1 year we are together, yet during that year, I have said the word "love" and given "hugs" many times over all the previous years combined. After six months, we really clicked together sexually, she has much less experiences then me, but she found some bondage restraints and put them on one day, since that day, we have the best of everything, she actually likes giving me head all day, and I love watching her feel sexy about it, we have so many ropes, accesories, she has a complete wardrobe of lingerie, and drawers full, she will almost do anything to please me, and I willl do more than anything to please her, and still its not enough we want more education, and will get it. So all this is possible, through one simple decision, I decided to be "her" man, I am always available for her, she goes to school so I encourage her to go and finish. I have lots of free time to prepare things for us to do, I have found a youthful me that is completely immature, yet I am serious and the one in control in a second, important when you want order in a zoo lol. I have to say Ive never been happier or in love, its been a year without being separated for more than 8 hours at a time, and we are absolute doing great, I believe the strongest connection between the 2 of us was made when we understood our desires for each other, from there friends also benefited by discovering bondage and what we play around with, we are revamping the bondage and fetish scenes reputation, one soul at a time lol. Anyways, I hope this will open someones eyes before it is too late. Writing it up for such a cause makes it a breeze.

[QUOTE]SHR, who is the "none of you" you are referring to in your post?[/QUOTE]

Hum... I'll say it should be the 2 cats and the dog, they butt naked 24/7. (did I just wink myself out of existence with that post? (there is no such expression I guess.)

[QUOTE]Personally, I don't mind using a bit of children speak when kids are young, as long as you don't use babytalk or belittle them. I don't have children myself (yet), but did do a lot of babysitting. The girls could ask me anything about life, death and everything in between. I just answered them based on their level of comprehension and making sure I'd verify what they knew and really wanted to know. Children are really adorable in the way they develop, grow and learn about the world[/QUOTE]

I don't use it on younger people, they need to learn correct pronounciations and all the while I have to watch myself not to let things slip, but then again im the perfect example of what the kids shouldn't be like, but I always have plenty of activities to show, I can teach them small piano tunes, I have 100's of society games, I think the chinesse learn there numbers at 2 or something in those lines, something to do with brain connection development, Ill look it up when it shows its head one day lol.

The immature talk is in between me and a few select friends, and its not appropriate for young ears, and perhaps not dignified enough for this forum, perhaps Ill make a video one day and immortalize it.

[QUOTE]Off course parents can do whatever they like. I just don't oppose to children's speak, like some teletubbie-hating folks do I do agree it is good for a kid's vocabulary to listen to all sorts of speak.[/QUOTE]

I'm sorry but I have to try and disagree, some children lead miserable lives at the hands of ignorant and vengeful parents, the degree of this varies greatly, some are having children and they are not ready to be parents, others did not want a second child and they receive mistreatment, others are just too high to do whatever, some have even sold them.

Perhaps you mean among standard health safety type of parents, then I would have to agree, and even then when I think about it, the kids around here my age with parents that are just there bt not putting rules, they cant even old a job for a week. they have to sell pot to make anything. Anyways, one things clear, beat your kids people. Even if youre not sure, give him a smack in the head when you cross him in the corridor, he probably deserves it, and if complains tell him your dad had a collection of exotic wood sticks. Im just joking, only when they deserve it,

Yes dont worry I was just exagerating, I have never lfted a hand on my dog and he as better manners than most kids around here.

I understand perfectly with your surroundings, all my life I had ppl tell me my friends where a bad influence etc, I am the one who made them work and had a "responsable" drug cota, meaning that I would act feed up and its time to go home, since I am with my women, I do not want any of them near, they apparently have plunged very deep and lost houses and familly contact. Like anything else, the only person in control of your surroundings is yourself, but I must admit I have always been the one who doesnt give in to influence, I like being able to say no to whatever I could not in the past.

Wow.... that's not what I meant to by "Off course parents can do whatever they like." That was referring to speech used towards kids!

I think beating kids or even lifting a hand is wrong! I mean; if I have an argument with my bf, I'd be flabbergasted if he'd even raise his hand to me to shut me up. That would probably be the end of out relationship. Same if I'd do that to him. I don't want to teach my future children ANY situation in which violence is ok. I want my kids to understand why some behavior is unacceptable. By beating it out of them, they do not understand, all they learn is to fear and how to misuse authority. I want their home to be a safe sanctuary; a place where they can be themselves and feel free to share anything with me. And feel free to just sit in a corner and be grumpy once in a while, no questions asked. Everyone has bad days, so do kids. I was not beaten as a kid, apart from a few slaps. But my upbringing sure wasn't perfect either. Not to go into details; but I've learned how wrong it can be to put conditions to your love as a parent. Unconditional love is what kids need. And that's what I intend to give my own some day. So that they can grow up feeling good about themselves, not live in fear they'll lose their parents' love and their home if they're not perfect.

I wasn't beaten as such as a child, but occasionally i did get a whack across the backside by my father when i spoke rudely to my mother.It didn't do me harm,but my father didn't like hitting me.Having my own children has made me see what a little bitch i was to my mother.I've learnt ways of disciplining my children without hitting them,but children these days think that they are entitled to everything,and don't respect their parents or elders anymore.

I've seen the results of violence resulting from couples, either the women's life is over just like whats happening to one of my friends, I hate her more and more each time I hear of the stupidities she utters and complains of her difficult life that to me doesnt sound challenging at all, its very simple, keep away from retards, but nooo, she goes right back, and then calls me with the big scandalous story of her life, again, I lost her anyway, I'm not going to expose my loved ones too someone weak like that, all the times she went after the first time, she deserves them all and everything thats happening to her is a direct result of her actions, and she doesnt even realize it, Its sad but I'm sure she wont be making it, she calls me when shes in trouble but doesnt realize I cant be friends with someone so weak willed, because her problems then become mine, its been years, and she made all the wrong choices even with strong support from her family.

My gf's mother was in a similar scenario, he didnt want a 2nd kid, meaning my gf, he would pick her up by the neck and throw her, he made huge steaks and forced them down her throath by like squeezing it down with is 2 hands and he wouldnt stop till the plate is finished, she was very young, but her mother decided she was leaving with her kids, and she did and hasnt taken a step back since. I always tell her how gratefull I am for having been strong at the time, I would not be with her now if it werent for her mothers courage.

And for the children, well I believe in discipline, wich is greatly lacking in some families, when a kid attacks other ppl with knives and hes 6 years old theres a big problem somewhere, we were in the kitchen and is little brother starts throwing a bunch of steak knives at us like a maniac, we were teens at the time, and we didnt bother him or anything of the kind. Anyways its just an example, but I believe discipline can be maintained with strong character, everyone always leave there kids with me knowing I can have 20 with me and all of them behave and participate, I used to do volunteer work at a barn where I practiced horseback riding, it started out when the 4 girls taking care of 12 kids had zero control, I find the threatening to eat them for lunch or telling them your really good friends with the boogeyman gets them to behave real quick, I spent the rest of the summer going everyday to see those kids, and at the end they were all crying and didnt want to leave, after that I realized I have to much affinity witch children to let it go to waste, and I would slowly start taking care of my friends kids, in the end it was a really great idea, the kids with parents that werent well manered learned them from the ones that had strict parents, just have to make sure you always include everyone, no one must feel left behind or less important. And my dog is a great help, the poor guy, there all petting him but just pulling out is hair, he doesnt make a sound and just looks at me with a "how much more of this have I got to endure" look, aaah those were good times lol, very soon I may have some of my own wich Ive been waiting for at least 5 years knowing I will one day, but I think I'm going to adopt, especially since I imagine scolding them for scrapping my wife, "she was real tight before you came along" lol, I dont mind but my gf is way to proud of her body, and I know there are kids out there that need a home, so hopefully my girl will give the go ahead within the next ten years.

[QUOTE=raunchy gal;264496]I wasn't beaten as such as a child, but occasionally i did get a whack across the backside by my father when i spoke rudely to my mother.It didn't do me harm,but my father didn't like hitting me.Having my own children has made me see what a little bitch i was to my mother.I've learnt ways of disciplining my children without hitting them,but children these days think that they are entitled to everything,and don't respect their parents or elders anymore.[/QUOTE]

Indeed, if I talked back to my parents, I would be beaten until I stripped naked and asked for forgiveness in a sincere tone and it was given. I did deserve it thought, and I never held a grudge against him for making me a respectable man, he always had and still does have my best interests in mind, he gave me all the things I need too lead an honest life.