hi,
I've been going out with my girl friend a while now and we started having sex a couple of weeks ago. She was a virgin, I'm not. The problem has been that every time we have, she's complained (thats an understatement) of it hurting.I'm not huge - about 6.5 and 4.5 girth but when I go inside her - i cant get that deep (even though i can get my fingers all of the way in ) and its the back wall that hurts her.
The first time we had sex, i certainly didn't break her haymen but i realise that it might have been broken anyway from fingering. I came to the conclusion that she's either really shallow, or her haymen hasn't been broken.
I haven't pusher her into having sex at all, she's the one wanting to do it (not saying I don't)
I hope you can help
Thanks
well actually i recommend her being on top.. this allows her to let it go in as deep or shallow as she wants.. not only will this help from causing her much pain but you just laying there and feeling her slowly work her way down ya is very much a turn on.. at least it is in my eyes
thanks, she has been going on top for that reason, it seems to be getting a little better but she isn't enjoyin herself - she say's it doesn't really feel like anything but this could be due to the pain turning her off so much? I'm no professional but I've always managed to satisify during intercourse previously. I'm just not sure what to do.
She's not fully aroused or is very small. You aren't going under the cervix.
Right,
Just to update you all - for peopel who are having similar problems...
After about the 4th time of trying, the pain stopped (not completely). Basically she just tried relaxing...I admit - I thought she was relaxed previously but obviously not (she can appear relaxed but her body might not be)
The best advice I can give is to keep at it, and take it gently...remember your stimulating areas that haven't really been stimulated before. Even now (when sex is extremely good) - there are still times that it hurts her due to her not being used to herself being stimulated in that way.
Thanks all that gave advice!
Well, she was a virgin. It's natural that in the beginning, it's going to hurt some (although this should be minimized as much as possible). I'm glad it's better now. A person's psychological state (not being able to relax) can have such a big effect on sex - it's pretty amazing actually.