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Fiance has issue ejaculating from intercourse

My fiance quite often can't ejaculate from intercourse alone. Usually after I've had my fun and feeling satisfied I finish him with my mouth. Just wondering why this is? It used to be the other way around. In the past he would never cum from oral no matter how long I went at it. Just wondering why the change and if there's anything to be concerned about.

Cheers

Three possibilities come to mind; first, is the fact that he is not sufficiently aroused; second, that whatever position(s) you are using is/are not giving his penis enough friction; third, would be that if he has had a recent orgasm either from Foreplay or perhaps masturbation, that subsequent orgasms are more difficult to trigger.

Welcome to the SI101 Board and it Forums. I hope you will enjoy participating. Please familiarize yourself with the Index found at the top of the main screen. It contains links to helpful informative insightful as well as how-to articles that discuss the most common questions and concerns people ask about--like your observations. In addition, if you click on the site's Home Page you will find even more information including animated illustrated positions by category. I recommend that the two of you read each of the articles, discuss what you have read, and add the information to what each of you already knows. Information is empowering.

There is nothing to be concerned about, especially if he can climax from masturbation. More than likely technique is the problem. If he is under the impression that the way to an orgasm is from lots and Lots and LOTS of stroking/thrusting, then this is the wrong approach. This is the why of fooling around, making out from Necking, Petting, Heavy Petting, and then Foreplay.

There is an article on all this as well as an article on how best to stimulate each other from oral and finger stimulation.

I hope this is of help. Got questions?

P.S. Pt. 2

Ideally, intercourse should not begin until the man has been brought to the brink of an orgasm by hand &/or mouth along with all the kissing and caressing. All too often nowadays, guys have the misguided misconception that the way to climax is from lots and Lots and LOTS of stroking/thrusting. WRONG. This is the why for all the fooling around and making out beforehand.

If your man has not had a climax recently and he has been brought to the brink of a climax yet can still maintain sufficient control in order to move around and get into position then his climax will likely happen within the first two-three minutes. If it happens during initial penetration or the first few strokes, this is known as Premature Ejaculation, and can be managed with techniques outlined in an article listed in the Index.

If the two of you are trying for O#2-3, and finding it difficult, then consider that every man has a refractory period that can last from several minutes to perhaps a half hour in teen-hood to middle age. After this period has elapsed, he can be ready for the next O, although each subsequent climax will be more difficult to trigger. At some point depending upon age and "wiring" his body will refuse to respond altogether for several hours; moreover, he will not have an intense orgasm with lots of fluid until a day or two later in which there have been no orgasms.

Positions can affect results. Depending upon which one you choose to use, AND, depending upon the list of his penis {up, down, straight, left, right) the natural curve can affect how much contact there will be with the vaginal wall, thus how much friction, thus how much stimulation.

One or more of these conditions can be the cause of his problem. Start at the top and work your way down the list. Make sure that you make out a lot, bring him to the brink of an orgasm yet not so close that he loses control before getting into position, and see if this fixes the situation. If I were a betting man, I would venture to bet that it will. If not, then continue on down the list and see how each technique affects his ability to climax.

[color=blue]i think it's mental.....yes men are visual

i find that my main control of when to orgasm when having sex relies on my imagination and what in particular that my partner is doing that turns me on

maybe it's the thought that you had sex with him, pulled him out of your pussy, and now you're tasting your own juices from his cock that turns him on and pushes him over the edge....rather than just giving him oral before intercourse

just my thought on it :rolleyes:
[/color]

He can't reach orgasm because his arousal hasn't gotten to the point where his orgasm will be triggered.

While this is HIS issue to work on, you can help. But don't go out buying lingerie, or thinking of positions - go for the heavy stuff = Total Sensory Overload. Unleash your inner tigress and turn him into a puddle of quivering protoplasm. No toys necessary.

Find, read and then do The Program as described in a thread of the same name.

By the time you eventually reach his genitals, he'll be so ready he'll come if you lightly breathe onto him.

I'd recommend doing it 5 times in 45 minutes whilst wearing nothing more than an evil grin but that's just me. After that I untie him.

I would say the position has big impact on ejeculation. Also, the mood is also important too. I know that I can set myself to ejeculate at certain position because both of us are enjoying it at the same time. Other position (doggy) while I might enjoy but my partner can't handle the stimulation. Most of the time, my partner gives up when she on top (cowboy) before I even reach an orgasm. Oral sex can't really get me off because of less friction.

Have him try the frog position [ have him on top with his legs outside of your legs, this will make a tighter entrance which stimulate him more ]

Good luck with your sex adventure!

Ermmm... Yeah...

Some of us just don't ejaculate at all from intercourse. I still don't.

I believe that this is the issue for myself: [url=http://www.healthystrokes.com/]HealthyStrokes.com

But others have suggested other causes: [url=http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/cupids-poisoned-arrow/201107/porn-in... Sexual Dysfunction Is A Growing Problem | Psychology Today which could apply in my case. I don't know.

Be glad that your husband can ejaculate at all. Any woman with me won't have that luxury. But I can go for a longer time than most when I can keep it up.

Sigh, gonna suck to be me at some point in the future (though not yet, not just yet... :D)

Dirac:
I have the same problem with my boyfriend.
Apparently, this happens more than I would have thought.
I suggest try new positions and take the advice that others give you.

[QUOTE=EvilEvilKitten;271080]He can't reach orgasm because his arousal hasn't gotten to the point where his orgasm will be triggered.

While this is HIS issue to work on, you can help. But don't go out buying lingerie, or thinking of positions - go for the heavy stuff = Total Sensory Overload. Unleash your inner tigress and turn him into a puddle of quivering protoplasm. No toys necessary.

Find, read and then do The Program as described in a thread of the same name.

By the time you eventually reach his genitals, he'll be so ready he'll come if you lightly breathe onto him.

I'd recommend doing it 5 times in 45 minutes whilst wearing nothing more than an evil grin but that's just me. After that I untie him.[/QUOTE]

I have the same issue with my husband. I read the program and it sounds like fun going 3 rounds however you wrote here that you recommend doing it 5 times in 45 minutes. How is it even possible to go through all those steps 5 times in 45 minutes let alone not to mention the refractory period guys have?

You mention its his issue to work on but what is it exactly that he can do? As for sensory overload do you mean something like massaging his body with mine? I know every man is different and that my husband and myself would know best but could you elaborate on this and give some suggestions.

Thank you

When specifying 3 times I am speakingof The Program. The Program is for ongoing enjoyment between relaxed and affectionate lovers.

When speaking of 5 times in 45 minutes, I am speaking of something else entirely. The theory is that most men have no idea what they are really capable of. The 5 times in 45 minutes is an Experiment; one that educates you into what works with him when, how and how often - and shows him what he can do with sympathetic assistance. During this experiment, you don't stand across the room and gyrate; No - this is "full-bore, skin-on-skin, no holds-barred, using everything you have got" sex - the more intense the better. Open your mind and use your imagination.

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