you cant get aroused cos you're too busy worrying! size doesn't matter, a woman can only manage 5 inches so if you've got 5 inches or less, think yourself lucky! at least you can get the whole of your wee willy inside her

> something that happened a while ago but I still dont understand. A previous girlfriend and I enjoyed a very good relationship but when things did become sexual, I just couldnt perform..........It was incredibly embarrasing and I have no idea why I couldnt get it up....I mean afterwards I was fine

The male arousal mechanism is very fragile. I agree with the wizz kid. When we worry and ruminate over what if's and why nots, size, confidence, etc., the ability to become erect is sabotaged. The proof of this "Performance Anxiety" (a real condition) is in the fact that you can perform when alone yet fail when you are in the company of your girlfriend and worrying.

The fix is relatively simple. Like the patient who wanted to know what to do as he sat with the doctor in his office complaining that his arm hurt when he raised it so high, the doctor replied, "don't raise it that high". The fix for Performance Anxiety is to simply stop worrying about things you cannot control or change. Having self confidence is a big part of this equation.

PE affects most guys new to sex and a high level of intimacy. It goes away in time as we become more comfortable with the situation, self, and our partner. Nobody expects a novice lover to be a skilled accomplished perfect lover. These things take practice and time.

> I have read the size matters only so much sections and am thoroughly aware, however Im 17 and 5.7" long and 5"girth......for my age I just dont think I match up very well at all

What fact are you basing your opinion upon and what is the proof?

Here are my facts that say you are completely normal:

* "Normal" is a size range, usually stated to be between 4.25" and perhaps ~7". If a person falls within this range, he is considered to be of normal size.

* "Average" is a point midway between extremes. The point is also based upon a person's ethnicity and genetics. Why?

* Size is relative to a person's ethnicity and genetic makeup. During a teen's formative years, and, depending upon when he began "sprouting", size also has an age component. A boy who begins maturing at 14 or 15 is going to be at a different point on the ruler than a boy who begins maturing at 13.

There are several charts that show length and circumference based upon age as well as the other criteria. Who knows how accurate the statistics are that went into making them. What is fact is that Blacks typically sport the longest penises; Asians and other Mongoloid groups the shortest; and, Caucasians somewhere in the middle. Without knowing your race, it is impossible to say whether you are above average, average, or coming up short.

* It really does not matter. Size is a guy thing. Control is a girl thing. You should really be concerned about and focused on what girls consider important.** It is a girl thing to consider the erect penis as a lever of sorts that acts as both a throttle and brake over a man's arousal. As such the penis need only be large enough for her to get a good grip!

* All other things being equal, an Asian woman and Black man can be just as compatible as an Asian couple or any other pairing.

** Here is another fact: A woman would much rather make love with a man who is a knowledgeable, skilled, carring, compassionate, creative, lover than some oaf regardless of the size of his endowment. This is a truth that you and every other male should spend as much time being concerned about as how big "I" am. Worry about and be concerned about what really matters.

> I dont have a girlfriend but am stressing out what will happen If I do..........my self confidence is not exactly the best in the world.

Confidence is both a state of mind and a state of being. A person gains confidence by "changing his mind" for the positive, and, by gaining life experience. You are young; you can certainly work on the former and gain experience along the way as you continue to mature and interact with others socially.

[QUOTE=Chris88]First being size....[/QUOTE]

Size doesn't matter it's what you do with it that does...I had boyfiends that were only concerned with self-pleasure....them being "big" by society standards only caused me pain with no pleasure...

[QUOTE=Chris88]The second thing Is that recently (past few weeks or so) Ive found that it is very hard to get myself aroused[/QUOTE]

Stess could be one reason
Maturity another...you might be a little more choosy about what turns you on these days. your mind rules you penis not other way around. it is not necesssarily a bad thing ;)

[QUOTE=Chris88]The final thing is something that happened a while ago but I still dont understand. A previous girlfriend and I enjoyed a very good relationship but when things did become sexual, I just couldnt perform....[/QUOTE]

you were just nervous! it's easier for a girl, if she gets nervous/dry for some reason a bit of lube and you are good to go :) when you are a guy it's a little more compecated just try and stay relaxed the chances are she is just as nervous as you are...

The finding it hard to get yourself aroused by what normally would is nothing abnormal. Like wifey said, maturity or stress.
I've had to change what I think about a few times, it kind of gets annoying having to find something new, but just experiment with some new things.

[QUOTE=Chris88]Hi everyone
After hangingin around and reading on these forums Ive decided to actually register =P
Recently(some not recent) a few things have been bugging the hell out of me. Any help/advice would be seriously seriously appreciated!

First being size....yes I have read the size matters only so much sections and am thoroughly aware, however Im 17 and 5.7" long and 5"girth......for my age I just dont think I match up very well at all =S I havnt grown for a few years and thats really getting to me as well.

The second thing Is that recently (past few weeks or so) Ive found that it is very hard to get myself aroused, Ive been very disconcerted by this and am really really hoping its just a stage that will pass! Things that used to get me hard asap now dont or take a long time to........I have no idea why but its very werid....=S I dont have a girlfriend but am stressing out what will happen If I do..........my self confidence is not exactly the best in the world....

The final thing is something that happened a while ago but I still dont understand. A previous girlfriend and I enjoyed a very good relationship but when things did become sexual, I just couldnt perform..........It was incredibly embarrasing and I have no idea why I couldnt get it up....I mean afterwards I was fine but by then it was too late and she broke up with me (not for that reason Im pretty sure..........)

My apologies if similar subjects are brought up on a daily basis but I would feel a lot better with any advice/tips from anyone!
Thanks in advance[/QUOTE]

Chris:

I had a very similar experience when I was dating. I know exactly what you're going through.

First question: are you taking any medications of any kind?

And by the way, just drop the whole penis size issue. You're normal and leave it at that. Don't even concern yourself with it.

Had the same problem when I was going through school. It took me 3 times to finally lose it. I was a nervous wreck. I could get hard as a rock for a BJ, but lost it all when it came time to put it in. Luckily she understood, and I haven't stopped since.
Sometimes I think the little guy runs my life, 24 with the drive of a 13 year old that has never had any!!!!!!!