Well, If she says that he has orgasm, I would think that she has (unless shes lying, in which case the question arises "Why would she lie about something like that?") Females can multi-orgasm, and can continue penetration even after one orgasm and continue directly to the next.

I hope this helps? If you truly think shes lying then sit her down and ask directly, tell her you wont be angry if it hasn't happened yet, and that you just want to please her. From there, your best bet is to have her show you how to please her by watching her masturbate herself. Or have her tell you how she likes it done. {Remember, most women cannot orgasm from penetration alone}

OK, I'll cut straight to it: this question has as many threads as any question you can think up. Read around a bit. Bottom line is that you men never really "know" and there is no sense getting hung up on it. If she is happy, what difference does it make?

You cannot/do not give anyone an orgasm. If men assumed responsibility for theirs and women assumed responsibility for theirs, sex would be more pleasureable for all of us.

> I'm not sure if she's ever had an orgasm but she claims to have them sometimes and others not. I think it may be a put on though. The only way I can know for sure is to ask a couple of questions.

If you look at some of the recent exchanges Brandye and I have had you will find one in which she categorically states that a man will never know for certain if a woman experiences an orgasm. The question of "did she or didn't she" will remain one of life's true mysteries. What should you do with the information? Know that you have given her much pleasure and that whether or not she really did or not is not as important as in knowing the "ride" was more important than the destination for her.

> When a male has an orgasm, his genitals get extremely sensitive and it's very hard to continue having sex almost painful, is this the same for when a woman has an orgasm?

Perhaps Brandye can address this matter more suitably. The male hypersensitivity after climaxing is due to the release of a certain chemical in the brain. Several minutes later, the penis is again able to be touched and another orgasm can be worked on if desired.

My guess is that the hypersensitivity of a woman's clitoris is different and similar to what uncircumcised men experience with the Glans when the foreskin is retracted. The tip of the clitoris contains twice as many nerves as the Glans yet both are similar in form and function. When the foreskin is retracted, the exposed and unprotected nerves are extremely sensitive to touch. Can you imagine how it is for women who have twice the number of nerve endings although concentrated in an area the size of a pencil eraser?

> Also I'd like anyone who is willing to give me pointers that may cause her to have an orgasm if she's never had one before.

First, it is important to know that we do not give orgasms away. Each of us is responsible for our own. All any of us can do is to help our partner achieve his or her own. For any of us to make the transition from being preorgasmic, we must on our own learn to masturbate. Boys do this rather mater of factly immediately after puberty. Many girls do not, either learning later or not at all. The first step is for her to learn to masturbate regularly and consistently. If and when she can do this she can then teach you how to provide the stimulation she requires.

We all understand the basic mechanics involved in stroking a penis and fingering a clitoris, yet each of us develops a "fine art" to the procedure that is specific and unique to each of us. It is this fine art that must be taught to our partner. When we masturbate we benefit from internal feedback that lets us modulate and adjust our movements; when we turn the job over to someone else there is not direct feedback. In order to re-establish the feedback we must give our partner verbal and/or non-verbal cues on how we are responding to their caresses and for what we need, now. Verbal can be a word or utterence; non-verbal can be a squeeze of the hand or some other form of body english that the two of you work out to convey specific meanings.

Without benefit of feedback all any of us can hope for is getting it right about half the time. With something so important, who wants this as a batting average? To help get it right I recommend that we demonstrate to our partner how we masturbate in order for them to visualize how we do it when alone. Then, to take our partner's hand and guide their movements several times until s/he learns to mimic our movements, rhythms, tempo, and pressures.

Do any women (or men) have any advice on how to have an orgasm (for a woman)? I've had sex about 5 times, but never orgasmed and I liked the guy each time, but when it comes right down to it, I'm horny at the wrong times and I'm not really turned on at the moment. Any advice?

Booty,

Look at "Female Sexual Response" in Chick Chat.