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> She is semi-scared of giving me oral. In a sense, she's scared of swallowing (basically, like a lot of woman i guess).

What is she afraid of, exactly:

A. dealing with the force of the ejaculation
B. gagging
C. taste
D. disease
E. other

No one is obligated or obliged to swallow. Some people never will, some will from the start, some will change. It is a woman's choice and we must live with her decision. I am glad you are OK with her decision as it stands now.

When a woman does not want to swallow, there are a couple of options; first, you can warn her that you are about to climax, pull out if your penis is in her mouth, and ejaculate somewhere. This can be on her body, yours, or into a tissue or cloth.

She can be alerted to the immediacy of the upcoming event when you warn her verbally or non-verbally, and/or, she can tell by placing her thumb over the urethra (hump) at the base of your penis. She can feel the semen as it surges forward and take immediate action. She can also tightly squeeze the top of your shaft in order to retard the liquid's escape.

Please read these articles and then discuss what you have learned:

How Do I Get Him/Her to Orgasm From a Hand/Blow Job?

Semen: nutrient facts & taste

I hope this is of help. Got questions?

(BTW, Jordan, the members of our community take pride in this site. Had you taken a moment to look around you would find that the following comment is unnecessary. (serious comments please not just some troll crap saying - 'force it upon her' or some sh!t.))

Just force it upon her.

Or explain to her that she shouldn't be afraid of it being "bad" she should be afraid of doing such a good job that you will be under her spell and be willing to do anything for it. Women should just realize that as much as they love oral, men probably love it 10000000 times more. (Not true but it seems men are more fixated on getting blown then women are)

Most women who "hate it" tend to become almost obssessed with it when they have the right partner. They become amazed by it, the fact that they can do something so amazing and control a mans pleasure so easily. If you've ever received a good blow job then you know just how mind numbing it can be. Even a bad one is still extraordinary.

Perhaps she needs to try it (with the help of some gentle support) and decide for herself what is fun. If she's worried about cum then wear a flavored condom. Then one day as she realizes how fun it is, then she will try it sans condom.

Hey, Jordan.

Not too long ago, I was in the same position with my bf at the time and I was really nervous about going down on him.

Most likely than not, eventually she could come around and if not, I would discuss this more with your girlfriend. One thing that helped me, overcome this fear was communication. The other thing was relying on feedback while I went down on him.

I will say this though, if she's nervous, I'm gonna suggest to her that if anything, she could start out with a hand job first as a way to ease herself into it.

Also, in this case, since you are the one receiving, then quite obviously, she's the one in control.

Communicate with her. If she's worried about you cumming onto her in places that she does not prefer, give some vocal or physical feedback. Plus, it can be fun.

As for swallowing...I didn't. I don't ever intend to.

There is always the hand job/oral/hand job mix.

Finally, if there can be someway that you can allow her to take control of your pleasure, you might just unleash a sensual/sexual side of her that you never even thought was possible.

But remember, of all things, communicate with her before and during the act...and afterwards (optional)

That's my take.

Personally, I'm not too keen on oral, but I will do it because I would love to reciprocate that type of surrender and power...it's powerfully intimate.

(I have a very odd view on sexuality, pardon me if this isn't something that doesn't really click.)

Good reply, SG.

One point I forgot to mention about ejaculating in your partner's mouth, intended or not, is for her to raise her tongue to the roof of her mouth when the time comes. This will let the force dissipate and she can either spit out the semen, or, swallow. A lot of couples use this approach because you do not have to time pulling out, perhaps gauge the timing wrong, and it is also more intimate. The semen will spurt against the bottom of her tongue and not fly back to the rear of her mouth.

She can later rinse her mouth with water or a soda if desired.

I like SD's, suggestion of working your way up to more advanced endings over time. So, no pressure, communicate verbally or non-verbally, and have fun with whatever the two of you choose to do.

Apology accepted.

To be specific:

1. she moves, you do NOT move; this goes a long way to removing the gagging.
2. the taste is just the taste, there's not much you can do about that
3. the force of the ejaculation, again, it is what it is and it isn't much anyway
4. the submissive posture: change it to 'feeding off the male' and then you take it like a man while laying on your back - me I pin him down and growl if he tries to escape me

Fear of the unknown can only be solved by just doing it thus making it KNOWN.

But there's no rush.

A little while ago, i was in the same thing as you with me going down on a female and she was all new to it.
All i said to her is take your time and work on it slowly so you feel comfortable, she started by kissing lightly around the top and side of my penis and as she got more comfortable with doing that to doing more. Let her ask questions and try it when your not watching so it doesnt make her more nervous. For any female its a big step with touching and doing oral sex or things like that to a guy.
It may take a little while for her to get it done properly but she will be more comfortable with doing things in the end

[QUOTE=EvilEvilKitten;269918]To be specific:

4. the submissive posture: change it to 'feeding off the male' and then you take it like a man while laying on your back - me I pin him down and growl if he tries to escape me

[/QUOTE]

EEK... you wouldnt happen to live close by me would you? nudge nudge, wink wink
kidding

anyways, the best path to doing something someone is nervous about is baby steps. Ease into it. I may be as virgin as the day I was born (tear tear) but I have learned way more than possible here, so read around. Have her read around. Read around together (it might even become... naughty!) All I can really give you is the baby steps thing, the rest is me letting hot air out.

Yes, you're kidding but also no, you're not kidding.
Alas, most men would adore having a sexually assertive "fun-loving" woman as their partner and YET most women still refuse to permit themselves to be sexually assertive 'fun-loving'.

I understand exactly her frame of mind.

I had some fears many years ago (please don't ask how many!) before I started swallowing. Those fears were unfounded (to say the least). They were exagerated in my head and (looking back mind you) sort of silly. If you had told me I was being silly back then I would have slapped your face. But I sure was being silly.

We started off with him just cumming onto my face/mouth with my mouth closed. Did that for a few weeks. (Aim well and be careful to never get cum in the eyes. That hurts like hell.) Then we moved on to him cumming into my mouth, but me letting it all slide out. Did that for a few weeks. I got used to his cum and knew what to expect. This didn't help with the swallowing part, but at least I knew that cum itself was no big deal anymore. It was actually fun to play with. Then we moved on to having him cum into my mouth and me swallow it once he was done cumming.

Oh sure, the first several times I swallowed, I gagged. No big deal. Swallowing takes a bit of getting used to. I did not give up! I kept swallowing. I soon got past the gagging bit and never gagged again. I got the hang of it and was free to enjoy myself from then on. It took a few months for me to really truely get into it and to feel eager and enthusiastic while doing it. The upshot is that It took some effort on my part at first, but I was very glad I kept it up because in no time at all I was enjoying it and still do.

As far as the taste of cum goes, it's sort of unimportant. It's an acquired taste. Early on I just ignored the taste. I didn't really care about it one way or the other. I was too focused on mechanics and didn't pay much attention to anything else. Once I got to the point where mechanics were second nature, the taste part just fell into place naturally because by then I liked it. To me cum is usually thick and salty and I like that a lot.

As my husband and I get older he can't cum as often as he used to. I miss those times. It was great. Well, it's still good, just not as frequent as I'd like it to be.

> As my husband and I get older he can't cum as often as he used to. I miss those times. It was great. Well, it's still good, just not as frequent as I'd like it to be.

Making love is a partnership. Regardless of age, if he is unable to perform as often as you desire, he can always take care of your needs in other ways. For those times, begin with a lot of hugging, kissing, and caressing and then move on to Necking, Petting, and Heavy Petting. After half an hour or so of making out, and when she has been brought to the brink of an orgasm, help her to have one or more orgasms as desired by whatever method and means suits the two of you in the moment. Shucks, there's fingering, oral, using the "Kivin Method" as described in an article listed in the Index, oral and fingering (the dynamic duo).

Having a date night like this gives you what you want without making demands upon him.
If you want to enjoy multiple orgasms, let him know and encourage him to keep on keeping on....

[QUOTE=dancingdoc2;270224]>Regardless of age, if he is unable to perform as often as you desire, he can always take care of your needs in other ways.[/QUOTE]
Doc, I don't think I explained myself very well. He does satisfy my needs. Instead of servicing each other at the same time, we service each other at separate times and with different frequency. He services me whenever I need him to and I service him whenever he needs me to. Those are two completely different things to us and always have been. He used to need it a lot more than he does now. I just miss that. He continues to satisfy me whenever I need him to and with the same frequency as ever.

Well then, please substitute any word you do like. I don't mind. :p

If you come up with something I like too, I'd even be happy to go back and edit my original post (if the forum will still me that is).

Okay - here's a "first" for y'all - I OBJECT to using the term 'servicing' in this context because the term is inadequate and inappropriate to humans since humans are not objects.

You can service a car. You can service a debt. But you can't service humans.

"pleases" "exhilarates" "makes me sing opera"

am I getting close?
LOL