I've been in a tizzy over this for a time now, and I suppose this is as good a place as any to ask.
To preface, I'm guessing most, if not all of you have shared the sex-in/on-a-BLANK, strawberries-and-whip-cream, or dress-up-like-a-BLANK fantasies with a partner at some point. On relative terms, usually fairly standard, harmless fantasies even if your partner is not comfortable playing them out with you.
Then there are the fantasies you guard a little more closely; maybe a threesome, swinging, some 'light' group sex, maybe some bondage, a fetish, whatever. Fantasies you would be willing to at least talk about, even if you know you will not do them, as long as you are confident your partner will at least be amenable to you mentioning them. I would guess that most people have these type of fantasies, many have probably discussed them with one partner or another at some point.
But what about your deepest "darkest" fantasies? Do you have fantasies you have promised never to utter to anyone, not even your dearest love, even if you knew he/she would be willing to make them reality; fantasies you know would give you a "high" so incredible you are certain you could never experience it otherwise, just as surely as you know the psychological and emotional "costs" if they came true, or perhaps are even mentioned, is more than you are personally willing to accept? (Hopefully we're not talking about anything illegal here...I'm certainly not, just things out of bounds of social norms enough that it can make you extremely uncomfortable just knowing that you have them.)
If you have such fantasies, how do you handle them? Do you let yourself fantasize in private and revel in them alone? Or do you bury them and try and force yourself never to think of them out of fear that you might let your secrets slip? Have you told them and/or live them regardless of the costs?
I have such fantasies (though again, certainly nothing illegal and I'm guessing less risque than those held by some here, though I myself feel insane just for having them), though I am not sure how commong they are in general. :/
Anyway, I'm rambling now. Your thoughts are appreciated.
There are many degrees of fantasy that I go through. Some are tame and others are more adventursome, some are just that, fantasies but not something I would act on. Others are some I have but I don't think my wife will do, so I don't bring them up or talk about them with her. We were talking about sex and fantasies and she said she didn't have any. After we talked, she did have some, but they are tame. She asked me and I came up with many and some we have actually done.
For example, I had a fantasy about doing oral on her on the deck of our house and even sex. That happens a few times a year and is something we both enjoy. So this is one fantasy that became reality. I still consider it a fantasy for me.
I had one that I really thought would be fun and even mapped out the event. Never did happen and is one I don't think she would do. That was to go on a sexual treasure hunt. We would go on a hike and I would have different activities at different areas. We would take turns doing the activities. These activities were to share a kiss, give a back rub, flash her tits to me while going to the next clue or I had to flash her. Some clothing items during this was to change into a thong and wear it the rest of the hike, for her to go bra-less and wear a semi transparent shirt, I had to wear a mesh pair of shorts, one was to pick one item of clothing (other than shoes) to wear to the next activity point. Sexually activities were to give oral sex, a hand job or some fingering, a nice chest massage, and then intercourse (not to completion) in the position chosen by whoever had their turn, and then the last was intercourse to completion in any position chosen by the other person.
One fantasy I had and told her about was to go to a clothing optional beach. There was one in the area we were visiting and I was ready to go. She wouldn't and told me she couldn't understand why I would want such a thing.
One that I would like to do but would never mention to her is to have sex in the same location as some other couples. Such as at a hot tub and another couple starts to play with each other and we would then join in with the play time. It would be fun to watch her give me a blow job while watching another couple do the same or be in the middle of intercourse. Or to just be at an adult resort where we could have sex on the deck, patio, or in the room with other people walking by or seeing other couples having sex as we walk by.
One fantasy like this was to have sex in a hot tub at a hotel. We were able to do this in an enclosed hot tub at a excersize room. No one else was in the room and I slipped her bottoms off and raised her pussy out of the water and gave her some good oral sex. I then slipped my swimsuit off and sat on the edge of the hot tub while she gave me a bj. We got interrupted once and she was trying to figure out how to put her swimsuit back on without attracting attention, I just sat there and let the bubbles cover me. The person just came in to look at what was there and left. So we were able to finish.
To share or not to share...there are some fantasy's which I share and are the more mainstream ones. These are the ones I fantasize about doing with my partner. Then, there are the other's...These are the ones where I fantasize about being in a particular place and it's always having sex w/complete strangers. These I have never shared with anyone, and would not share with even a spouse, especially since the person in my life is not in the thought. Furthermore, none of these will ever come to fruition. The one which interests me is; I am playing pool in a bar w/a group of guys. I am the only woman in the bar, and of course all the guys are hot...I wind up getting done by all on the table, but it's not in a bad way...I am the center of their attention but it's not in a degrading way, it's like I am being admired by all these really hot guys. This is the short version, and the only time I have mentioned it to anyone...It's totally out of character for me, never happening, nor would I really want it to...and perhaps why it's just a "fantasy". Would I tell my man? Never!
Save those deepest darkest fantasies for masturbation.