TJ, I know in my experience that when my g/f comes I can feel her abdomen tense up and occasionally there is a slight discharge of fluid almost like she's ejaculating. Her vagina feels a lot tighter while this is occuring. Because of this, I never wonder if she came or not....I know she did. However, every woman is different and you may encounter women that don't have this same reaction, but mays still be getting off. Thanks for reading.

The famous scene from the movie When Harry Met Sally should be convincing. We girls can turn it on. You guys may never know the difference.

On the other side, I have had some wonderful, slow, lingering orgasms that would never bee seen as such outside my body. The male orgasm is pretty identifiable and if there is no ejaculate (except in some special situations), there was no orgasm. Every orgasm for every woman is a bit different from any others. Plus, we canbe completely satisfied without an orgasm. I have had lovely times feeling him in me and loving his ejaculating deep inside me. Or I have had oral for lengthy periods that have little ups and downs but no crunching orgasm. Wonderful!

There are a few constants but I am not sure I should share our secrets with guys. Many women have involuntary nipple erections right after orgasm. I am one of those. Many of us have real muscle contractions most of the time. With a finger on the anus, it is very noticeable/

Bottom line: Quit worrying about our orgasms; they are ours. You are not responsible; we are. If we are satisfied and tell you so, do not be so hung up. Many of my greatest moments have been with women; some with men. They probably did not know exactly how great it was for me. Maybe I did not either for a day or two.

I, for one, have never faked an orgasm, except to demonstrate my ability to do so.

In response to sven one's comment--you are only partly right. Yes, women do tend to tense up and tighten their vaginas when they reach orgasm. However, these symptoms are just as easy to fake as vocalizations! Admitedly, I don't know a way to fake ejaculation (well, maybe one way, but that's gross), but as you mentioned that only happens occasionally and to most women, myself included, not at all.

tjdude, in response to one thing you wrote earlier- I also do not always like being fingered, and I don't think it would be because of big fingers. I think technique is most important- the best was when this guy was sort of teasing & tickling with his fingers, mostly on the outside. I dated someone for 10 months and never really liked him fingering me.

Hey TJ,

Was it Seinfeld you were watching?

As far as your question, I know if my girlfriend has an orgasm because I feel her vagina go into contractions.

Being in a committed relationship, if my girlfriend faked an orgasm and I found out about it, I think that it would affect a lot of different parts of the relationship. My trust in her would definitely decrease.

I mean, if she'd lie about sex, what else could she lie about?

Andy,

When we do fake it, and we do, it is moreoften to make the guy feel adequate because so many men have hangups about "giving" us orgasms. Is it a lie?

If I am satisfied what difference does it make whether I had my sphincters pumping? I am happy, why should he feel inadequate?

A man can be satiated without being satisfied.

A woman can be satisfied without being satiated.

This yields two different world (sexual) views. Neither is right or wrong or good or bad. Our hormones are different. And "wild pumping?" Where did that come from. I can be very happy holding him in me and receiving whatever he pumps out. I can also be happy with wild pumping. Too bad, but you guys have to figure out what we want at that moment. Or, surprise of surprises, talk to us about it.

Communicate. Every women is different when it comes to their sexual needs. I've been with women when one time they will want heavy thrusting and the next they just want you deep inside holding still. Its strange but true...women can get off just by being "filled up" (pardon the pun). Lastly...don't be selfish....she'll thank you in more ways than one

i'm with bradye 100% with this, she knows what she's talking about. i don't need an orgasm to be satified (thats not to say i don't enjoy them), i just love being with my boyfriend, and sharing those moments, and it all feels good anyway!

Girls a little tricky, you really can't tell by her moans whether it's real or fake, I think that every girl fakes it at least once. there really is no way of knowing whether its real or not. Just think of it this way, if she is faking it then you know she really cares about you, she doesn't want to hurt your feelings so she pretends to like it. (sorry to put it that way)

Bah. Don't fake or the guy will never learn. And then you will keep going on and faking it and making a damn fool out of both of you. Let the guy learn how to please you. Teach him. Anybody can have a great sex life. There are a few methods that with even a small penis a man can give a HUGE orgasm. And I know a simple tecnique to give a HUGE orgasm with oral... it is all very easy.

play around with someone else doing what you do to your gf and if the other girl enjoys it then its prob real if not then ur in trouble...:)

-i like my solution it involves sex with 2 people!

i dunno tilston lol

also, to iwannagetbetter.
you mention that all men want to please their women and such. and that trust is the main issue. what about guys who just are out having fun, no relationship strings.
im sure there are some guys out there who would be way more hurt by the fact that you told them "you don't make me orgasm" "you aren't that good in bed" . if they heard that it would totally crush their ego.
i think for some guys that would be way worse than a little trust issue. like brandye said its not like coming out and telling a huge lie that you can't trust the girl. some women do it more for their guys sake.
but i agree you shouldn't fake, you should definelty let a guy know things just aren't working out. don't say "you suck in bed" just say... this just isn't getting me to where i need to be, try this or lets try this position, etc.

I personally agree with all the men who say they would be negatively affected if they found out their girlfriend was faking orgasms. I understand some of women feel its necessary to make their men feel like they are pleasing them, but trust me the damage you will do to your man if he ever finds out you are faking is much worse than the damage you will do to him if you tell him upfront. Atleast if you tell him up front the two of you can work on improving your sexual relationship. Faking orgasms solves nothing. It makes for a crappy sex life and adds deceit to a relationship. Why would any one want to do that? If your man isnt pleasing him dont fake it...show him what feels good and i guarantee a positive response. All men are happy to learn but we never will if every woman out there is BS'ing their pleasure.