How do I ask this girl out??????

[agspirou]

Alright so this might be kind of long so bear with me because i need some serious help.
I am 17 and a senior in high school. I have never had a real girlfriend before although I have hooked up with a few girls since i've been in high school. I honestly have never asked a girl out before as crazy as that sounds. I used to be afraid of dating a girl and have in the past rejected many girls that are widely considered very attractive who have had crushes on me. I'm a pretty good looking guy, very muscular and athletic (i play varsity football and basketball), but i am also kind of a bookworm. I have a 4.0 gpa and take AP Physics, calculus and the works. I am pretty popular around school even though i used to be very reserved and quiet.

Last year (junior year) i essentially tutored this girl in math all year. She was in my class but just kind of used me for math help. She is extremely popular and is widely regarded as the best looking girl in school. She has dated college guys and I swear she is absolutely drop dead gorgeous. Last year she had kind of a childish crush on me as in she liked me and thought i was sweet and cute, but i just helped her with math and i wasn't the type of guy she would seriously consider dating

I changed a lot over the summer and am essentially a whole different person. we still work on homework together but we hang out and text pretty much every day. I know she likes me a lot and if i asked her out i have no doubt she would say yes. I have turned into a guy she could seriously date, but i'm not sure how to take the next step. We already hang out all the time and have a great time together. At our homecoming dance last weekend she had a bunch of friends over to her house to take pictures and such beforehand and even though we weren't technically going to the dance as dates, we took prom style pictures together and we grinded with each other all dance and held hands and such. then the next night, there was a little concert going on that i had an extra ticket to so i invited her and picked up (but we didn't call it a date) and we had a lot of fun but ended up sitting by my family and we didn;t even hold hands or anything. just sat and talked as friends although i did buy her a tshirt afterwards.

Anyway, since i have been spending a lot of time at her house lately, i have gotten to know her family well and i know i have her parents approval. Especially her dads. I can tell he would be happy if i dated his daughter. Also her sisters love me and i always take time to play with her little sis who is just about the cutest kid ever.

I guess with me not being available on friday nights cuz of football games, and there always being group stuff going on saturday nights i don't know when to ask her out on a real date and tell her how i feel. After football games we always go out for dinner afterwards but its a group thing.

this weekend, there is a friday night home game, but a date after that wouldn't work cuz i'm not out of the stadium until around 10 pm and there is always group dinner and saturday night she is having a few people over for a bonfire for her 18th birthday which is october 12th, and then the saturday after that she is out of town and there is an away football game that friday night.

I really want to ask her out because I am literally crazy about her. All day long i can't take my mind off of her.I've never felt this way about a girl before. I know she likes me a lot also. my friend told me that he asked her whats going on between me and her the other day and she told him that she could see us dating but that we're just friends right now. besides having a specific night set up to take her out on a date, how do i even approach her to have the conversation to ask her out and tell her how i feel?

I am also a bit nervous to ask her out because I don't want to rush things but i almost can't take it any longer. Things are going well between us now and i have a lot of fun with her, and i don't want to go on a couple dates with her, have things not work out, and then ruining my future chances/friendship with her. I am not nervous that she would say no though because i am 100 percent sure she'd say yes.

I need some advice because as you can tell i am an emotional mess right now because of my feeling for her. I also don't want to wait too long though because i almost feel like i am slowly becoming less of a crush for her and more of like a "gay" best friend. I know its a lot to read but i have pretty much pored my mind out and just rambled everything onto this post. any advice would be greatly appreciated. I need it badly!

[dancingdoc2]

What has happened to you since June 13, and today?

First you were 18 and now you are 17. Was this a typo?

I answered your question way back then, what part(s) did you not understand?
I'll be happy to try and clarify.

-doc

[agspirou]

when i first joined i thought you had to be 18 to be on this site so thats what i put as my age. I realized that mistake so i changed it. My true age is 17. thanks

[agspirou]

And when i say i changed a lot over the summer, if you're comparing to my other post, my parents sent me to Greece for a month and a half where i went to a summer camp for greek american kids, and then i stayed with cousins after that. it was a life changing experience, and it opened my eyes to new things. I am also much more confident and outgoing now. I also lost my virginity in Greece this summer, and have hooked up with a girl from school i've liked for a couple years since i got back. That girl decided she "loved" which scared me so I broke it off with her since I didn't want a relationship. Plus I was starting to focus on the girl my post is about, and the girl i hooked up with is nothing compared to her. This girl i would actually want a relationship with. Thanks, and sorry about the age thing. Hope this clears some stuff up

[dancingdoc2]

> I have turned into a guy she could seriously date, but i'm not sure how to take the next step. We already hang out all the time and have a great time together.

> Anyway, since i have been spending a lot of time at her house lately, i have gotten to know her family well and i know i have her parents approval.

> besides having a specific night set up to take her out on a date, how do i even approach her to have the conversation to ask her out and tell her how i feel?

Because your nights are full, ask her to go on daytime dates! This is not rocket science. Movies have matinees. Ice cream and frozen yogurt shops are open, theme parks are open, parks are open, hiking trails are open, malls are open, restaurants and cafes are open--all during daylight hours. "Dates" do not know about clocks.

> i don't want to go on a couple dates with her, have things not work out, and then ruining my future chances/friendship with her.

Well, had you been reading any of the articles on dating, you would know that each one of us runs the risk of relationships not working out. This is the nature of dating and also why we date. All the people we go on dates with will eventually move on to other people. Some dates will last one or two times, others longer, a few much longer, and eventually one will become a keeper. We date in order to learn what humanity has to offer us in potential mates. We learn about personalities, quirks, likes, dislikes, goals, values, etc. in addition to being able to socialize and do things with a person of the opposite gender on a regular basis.

I've said this time and again: dating should not begin and end with the first warm body who expresses an interest in us. At 17 you are just beginning the process. Expect to date lots of girls between now and the end of college.

There is absolutely no reason why a friendship should not continue just because you learn that you are not romantically suited to each other. If you try dating a particular individual and it doesn't work out, no harm no foul. Continue the friendship aspect if it suits the two of you. If having a friendship does not seem workable, at least part as friends. There is no reason to have hard feelings about any of this, in fact, ending on a sour note demonstrates poor sportsmanship.

How do you ask her out on a date? Asked and answered on June 13th. This was the point of my question about what has changed between then and now because you are asking the same question months later.

Call her on the phone, or, when you see her, inform her that you would like to go one a date some Saturday or Sunday afternoon. Give her specifics of what you have planned and a time for doing it. Do something you know she will like and give her a choice of times to do it just in case she is busy during the first time. After the first date, you can be more adventurous and ask her on dates to do something that may be new and different for her.

Now here is a possible revelation for you: if you are always at her house, then why not schedule a date during these times? If you are together or can be, then you can go on a bonafide date! Fit them in the free times available.

[EvilEvilKitten]

Okay let's deal with another issue here.

"That girl decided she "loved" which scared me so I broke it off with her since I didn't want a relationship. Plus I was starting to focus on the girl my post is about, and the girl i hooked up with is nothing compared to her."

Get your head out of your @#$.

She, either of them, are NOT on here on this earth to meet your standards.
For that statement alone you deserve to be kicked to the curb.

Until you have matured beyond such statements - stop dating anyone.