Odd sexual past

[joetoy07]

About 3 month ago I started started dating this girl who I knew had far more sexual experience then me but at the time I thought that was not a major issue. She at one time used to have sex with random men that she met online just to get off and kill some time this went on for almost 2 years straight up until a few months before I met her. She claims that it was only a few select men and that they were hand picked by her to be her discreet lovers because of there level of class and discreetness. This really was not much of an issue at first till I found out the next part and that was that one of these so called lovers would take her to sex shops for gangbangs with totally random men that he or she had never met and would never see again. She did that a number of times well seeing that guy and I must admit it kinda of seems wrong to me but there are so many other things about this girl that I like, should I let this one thing from her past which she says was a mistake and disgusted her be the only thing to not let the relationship work.

[dancingdoc2]

> should I let this one thing from her past which she says was a mistake and disgusted her be the only thing to not let the relationship work.

People can and do change what they want to change. People can be and usually are a different person at 21 than at 18; 30 than at 25, etc., both because of maturity, education, and simply wanting to be a better person.

Her sexual past is hers alone; however, having said that, it is important to know that every person she has previously had sex with also has a past--and the people each of them have had sex with, and so on and on. I strongly urge that both of you go and get a medical check up so you can assure each other that neither of you has an STD. These bugs get passed along and you want to make certain that nobody in the string had anything to pass along to the two of you!

Because her past is hers alone, as is your past yours alone, what matters is that with every new paring, there will be a new and different 'Square One" from which the two of you will begin your journey together. A person's (prior) experience equates to knowledge, not skill. Please read this article: HELP! S/He is more EXPERIENCED! To which I say:

Welcome to the SI101 Board and its Forums. I hope you enjoy participating. Please begin by familiarizing yourself with the FAQs, the Posting Guidelines section, and especially the Index, all found at the top of the main screen. The Index contains links to helpful informative insightful, as well as how-to information that discuss the most common questions and concerns people ask about. In addition, if you click on the site's Home page you will find even more information.

I hope this is of help. Got questions?

-doc

[Brandye]

You are another example of learning too much about a partner's past. OK, she has had sex. Most women you meet have. The details are none of your business except when disease is involved. If this is bugging you now, imagine it growing over the years. Unless YOU can come to grips with it, this known, or at least believed to be known, element of her past will make the relationship very difficult.

We, each of us, likely has some sexual experience in our past that may be shocking to others. Sometimes through loss of perspective; sometimes a chosen past life-style; sometimes just a horrible mistake. She needs to learn the limits to sharing. When men have pressed me for detail, they have become part of my past. Instantly.