Going to a dance (Slow dancing 101)

[johnyreetz]

Dancing is the fastest way to get
a girl alone and into your arms in public. Because almost all the girls like dancing.

[Barely18Guy]

Originally Posted by EvilEvilKitten

Dancing is the fastest way to get a girl alone and into your arms in public.

Guys, need I say more?

Alright then tell me, honestly, what would you do if you dance with a man that doesn't seem to know what he's doing, not at all, that blushes because of that, and that looks like he wears shoes of concrete?

I'd like dancing, but finesse isn't my thing, I'm a huge (in shape, not fat) football player, and unfortunately it doesn't help me at all.

I know that girls love dancing, oh hell I do! But I'd rather not go than have her think I'm too dumb to dance.

[dancingdoc2]

Hey, Guy, did you read the top half of this thread that begins with the article on how to dance, or, just jump in at the end?


> Alright then tell me, honestly, what would you do if you dance with a man that doesn't seem to know what he's doing, not at all, that blushes because of that, and that looks like he wears shoes of concrete?

1. As teens, a lot of the dancing is open and apart {no touching).
2. Save up and purchase a nice pair of dress shoes that either have
leather soles or composition soles of the type that permit slippage on
the floor.
3. If you do not seem to know what you are doing--learn. As explained, above, you can take inexpensive classes taught by local recreation and parks departments.
+ you can get started by reading the article and my follow up replies, above!

> I'd like dancing, but finesse isn't my thing, I'm a huge (in shape, not fat) football player, and unfortunately it doesn't help me at all.

All the more reason to take a few Ballroom dance lessons. A good instructor will teach men and women how to be light on their feet, move with grace {acquiring continuity of movement), and, to display styling.

> I know that girls love dancing, oh hell I do! But I'd rather not go than have her think I'm too dumb to dance.

"Dumb?" I do not believe so. Lacking technique? Definitely. Each dancer at one time or another walked into the dance class off the street. Most not knowing anything about dance, yet believing they wanted to do it enough to take the necessary steps to learn. I have taught kids, preteens, teens, college students, young adults, and the young at heart. Some become better at it than others, some have innate abilities, others struggle, yet the more a person goes dancing the better and more confident s/he becomes.

For girls in your age range, it is not so important that you know how to dance, what is important is that you get out there and do something that involves "her" or more to the point, the two of you in partnership. That you think enough about the activity to have taken some lessons, plan to, do, are all pluses.

As for timidness or because of blushing, the easiest way to overcome these traits is to act in the manner you wish to portray. This is not unlike being an actor or actress in a play. The person acts their way to success and with practice becomes the person they aspire to become. If you do not want to blush or be seen as timid, exude confidence, even if you are shaking in your shoes of concrete at first.

The point is, you get out there and participate and rock her world. She will appreciate your lack of confidence and expertise, especially, if she sees you having fun with her and in what the two of you are doing together.

Since you have indicated that you enjoy dancing then take some lessons thru parks & rec. or group lessons at a nearby studio. Know this, the better you become at your craft, the more it will show, and, the more you will be sought after.

[RedRoses]

Originally Posted by Barely18Guy

Alright then tell me, honestly, what would you do if you dance with a man that doesn't seem to know what he's doing, not at all, that blushes because of that, and that looks like he wears shoes of concrete?

I'd like dancing, but finesse isn't my thing, I'm a huge (in shape, not fat) football player, and unfortunately it doesn't help me at all.

I know that girls love dancing, oh hell I do! But I'd rather not go than have her think I'm too dumb to dance.

Honestly? I think it's cute

I used to perform as a bellydancer (amateur, not professional) and after that; I'd usually scan the walls and pick out guys like you to draw to the dance floor. I've also danced with guys that came to me and were fabulous in their movements. Which can be a great thing while in the moment of dancing. But they do tend to be touchy, overly confident and clingy after the dance. I like a sweet and shy smile better, esp when they did let their guard down and just dance with joy (which usually happened). Makes me think; I should really find myself a great place to dance again... Haven't done so in a looooong time...

[Barely18Guy]

I never realised, but society is putting so much pressure on everyone to just perform well that we forget to have fun, I knew it happened but never really noticed how it touched me...

I want to be a good lover;
I want to be a good football player;
I want to be a good dancer;
I want to be a good confident;
A socially recognised person...

Anything, I always feel like I must be good or great at it for people to have a good opinion of myself... I never realised that girls would only enjoy someone dancing and having fun with them...

And by the way doc, I almost read everything, (not in the mood of actually practicing dancing right now, btu I read all you said) I was telling EEK why I don't dance.

[EvilEvilKitten]

What would I do?
SMILE
I'm not the greatest dancer myself.
What impresses is your COURAGE at getting out there and dancing despite two left feet encased in concrete.
DUH!

[dancingdoc2]

> What impresses is your COURAGE at getting out there and dancing despite two left feet encased in concrete.

Yup, worked for me despite having two left feet, being left handed, and, having the two hemispheres of my brain reversed as is the case with many lefties.

[Foamy Beers]

I love to dance, it comes from a love of music. I've been dancing badly for years, and found a group that meets at the Boys and Girls Club gym for classes. Now I'm moving better, and know the steps/moves to do!

As I've found local social dances to go to, I'm having a lot of ladies wanting to dance with me, and that is a huge change in my life. I'm newly divorced, so this was a way to meet some ladies; and is working out quite well! My class partner is becoming a great friend, though we won't 'date', we enjoy each other's company.

Online videos, DVD packs, etc are an acceptable way to get started with the basic steps. Also...there is some truth to the "fake it till you make it" phrase...My class partner and I were shown one basic tango step. At a monthly dance, a tango was played, and I asked her to go out. Drawing on the one step, and memories of the Addams Family for attitude...we had several people asking "Where are you guys taking Tango lessons???!!!"

[dancingdoc2]

> "Where are you guys taking Tango lessons???!!!"

Keep up the good work. I teach for three different Recreation and Parks departments instead of in a studio. New students find this less intimidating, and I can hopefully find more people to teach and introduce to Ballroom dancing.

Dance videos are a great source of inspiration and serve as an introduction to the various dances; however, they are not good teaching aids. For this you need a competent and professionally trained instructor. Learning to dance is not particularly difficult, although, the road to becoming a good Leader or Follower is not by "monkey see, monkey do", there is much more to it than this.

(For those just reading this thread for the first time, please read it in its entirety.)

-doc