why did she tell me this

[duh477]

This girl that practically begged me to go out with her for about 2 years and we went out a few times and I decided that I really wanted to be with her and told her that I would try my best to make her happy. she said she didnt really want a boyfriend now and she wanted to just be friends so I said ok. Then last week when she turned 21 I asked her how things were going and she told me how a bunch of guys were trying to get her number at bars. Why would she tell me that? It just made me sad I was trying to be with her and then she tells me about these other guys trying to get her. Why? Was she just trying to hurt me and make me feel bad?

[dancingdoc2]

It's called "dating" and dating is all about learning about different people and finding out things about them in order to better recognize when Ms./Mr. Right comes along and what characteristics are important to you.

She long ago determined for whatever reason(s) that you are not her type, yet perhaps not so much that you cannot be friends. That said she said what she said not in any vindictive or hurtful way, just informative. Think nothing about it.

Now, move on and date lots of people, one or more at a time, none exclusively, and have fun all the while learning what attributes are important to you. Please read the articles listed in the Index that discuss dating.

[Buck Naked]

Ah, the games people play. If she was a truely good person that information, true or not, would never be said. Be glad you dodged a bullet there.

[EvilEvilKitten]

Piffle, Buck.

Really that was just information to explain her current status. What you should have done was say "Of course, they are! You should them that since you have mine, you don't need theirs." GRIN when you say this.

Dude - get some spark to you.

[Rouge]

Because she likes knowing that you (or any guy) are jealous at the idea. It's a female thing, no need to get your feathers ruffled.

[EvilEvilKitten]

Jealous? Really? What a waste of time and energy.

Seriously, guy, treat it as just information.

[lnt1103]

I have to agree with EEK, it's nothing more than info. OP, you're in "the friend zone" and you have to force yourself to remember that. It was nothing insidious, nothing meant to be harmful or induce jealousy. She was conversing with you just as she would with any other friend. You asked her "how's it going" and she answered you honestly.

[*HEATHER*]

its definately to make you jelous. not right of her.. dont let her see you reacting to this information--then you'll just be giving her what she was looking for.. attention--- and jelousy isnt the good kind

[EvilEvilKitten]

Will you people just ERASE the thought of JEALOUSY as the reason why anyone does anything, please and get to the REAL issue - they are NOT making you JEALOUS - YOU are making YOURSELF jealous -

YOU are responsible for YOUR emotions.

She's just giving him information - what he does with that and how he feels about it is HIS business NOT hers.

[dancingdoc2]

This thread is typical of so many, EEK. Either people ask for our thoughts, opinions, or, help and then reject it; or, as has happened at least three times in as many days, someone will jump into a thread without reading any of the preceding replies and state something that has been refuted in earlier replies. Then there are those cases in which someone replies to the tail end of an article in which their question or concern has been addressed in at the beginning of that particular thread.

Jealousy? 'nuf said.