Warning Signs - Part One

[sexgoddess1]

If you were raised in an abusive home you already know the signs and if you want to break the cycle of family abuse thats the persons decision. No one should have their partner raise a hand to them even family..

[kievan]

I do not completely agree with EEK's list of warning signs because it fits some stereotypes out there of abusive men also there are abusive women even though not physical they get men out of control for being manipulative amd contolling leaving deep pychological scars that cannot easily be erased from memory.
Little is mentioned about .

I disagree in EEK's comment on men's views of Rigid Sex Roles I personally would not seek nor approve of my wife if she was bisexual but that is me.
Is there anything wrong with my demands or I am behind times now?
I do not put women down but one must understand that there are societal influences where different cultures under different standards. That does not necessarily follow that abuse passes undetected in other cultures but standards are not the same such as in other societies feminist activities are not that relevant as gendr base descrimination is not really evident. Competiveness between male gender and female or even between same gender is minimal. I do not want to bring extreme cases like Afghanistan but more like Israel, Italy,Spain do not exhibit and share the same charcteristic of people in the UK, Canada or USA for example.
In our case
What's inside women's psyque that inspite warning signs etc women stil are drawn to half asses and bad stereotypes instead of chosing the good guys?
Why do the often pick the wrong personality over a good one?
Is it because women subconsciously assume the role of motherhood and look at their men as a father figure?
Or is it because the look up to their father's figure as a good example of what their boyfriend husbands should be?

I grew up as part of an abusive family my dad used to slap my Mum quite badly sometimes duringa heathed argument not very often but the act was there. He also used his thick leather honing belt to finish his razor blades to belt me up with whenever he thought he had a reason to do me for bad behaviour or escaping his orders .
I was brought in that kind of household and other abuses outside home caused for many years in my youth I tended to drown my sorrows in alcohol.
I have never abused anyone physically not quite built had to put up with ignorant high schoold mates calling me all kind of names being of Eastern European descent did not have and advantage in a Latin American country if you were not German or Anglo Saxon then one would fit stereotype of a hated Jew or or someone East of Germany I was a worthless piece of shit.
Still when came to Australia though blue eye and blonde I still be considerd shit and be referred pejoratively as "wog" because of my non Australian accent and that went of for years where I developed some sort of psychaitric condition and panic attacks followed.
All is over now the wog sterotype dissapeared even Italians are considered as the best in the world
Well some of them anyway
Even my wife who battled cancer four times left deep scars when HRT wasn't working she threw different objects even knives at me for four years our marriage was a sham I felt like leaving her for good but I stood by her side for fourteen years until the very end.

Personally I am quite confident, more discerning and well built guy now I take what I like and how I like it still attractive some may say that I am a creep because I like much younger women 22 to 30 well that is true but I get them out of their own will so it is not abuse anyway

[EvilEvilKitten]

Wow. You have issues.
First, why are you telling us all of this - if you're "over it"? Your father was an abuser - that's HIS problem. DON'T make it your problem.

Secondly, "women drive men crazy by being manipulative." This sounds more like "Hey, I can't win a verbal argument so I'll just beat her up to get my point across." - an excuse. One of those "she made me do it". IF that's the kind of person she really is then why are you still with her? Don't whine, walk. Notice: this is the same advice I give to women - if your partner's not listening, is abusive or not working with you to resolve issues - walk.

Third: there are stupid abusive bullies worldwide so the first thing to learn is how to NOT become their victim. Assesing situations correctly and getting yourself out of them is something you have to learn - it seems you just kept on doing the same old thing, re: your behavior, yet expected different outcomes. If that person does not matter to you then don't care what their opinion is, period. If they don't matter then neither does anything that comes out of their mouth.

All of this may sound difficult given your background, but by just changing your attitude, you can change your life...for the better.