Help!!!

[CleverName]

Yea, definatly don't say you love her or anything straight out. That could come off a bit creepy, or she might think you mean you love her like a sister, so stay away from that word for awhile.

[YHeloThar]

i'd say you're pretty hard into the friends category. i'm gonna throw it out there that you have a 1/3 chance of this going your way (as in she says ok lets date). but that's probably only gonna happen if you put out that you were sexually interested in her before. i.e.: i have lots of friends that are girls and i maintain interest by flirting with all of them, i know if i broke up with my girlfriend at least a few of them would want to date.

if you have just been a pussy all this time she is not going to want to date you. and if you turn on the burners now to try to make up for it she's just going to think you're a weirdo now.

1/3 chance she jumps on board with a relationship
2/3 chance it breaks the friendship you have now.

i would suggest accepting that you let it go on too long completely asexually and keep her as a friend.

http://www.theonion.com/content/opin...urce=c-section

here's a funny article that pretty much sums it up for you. (she might not be this much of a bitch but it's pretty much what the friends category represents)

[EvilEvilKitten]

Okay, tell her on the walk home after a nice dinner date. That should work.

BTW stop being shy - it does you NO good. I know you don't want to be too aggressive and too pushy but we want some enthusiasm from our guys, thank you. Don't be afraid to get a little closer than you normally would and just talk to her while you walk - put an arm around her shoulders or her waist.

Just stay like that and don't look for anything more.

Now it is her turn - either she steps up or she doesn't.

[Mkittan]

UPDATE
She suddenly said that I owe her a cuddle because of a scary movie we watched earlier in the year. Is this a sure sign she likes me? 'Cause I don't recall people who are just friends normally cuddling.

[CleverName]

Yea, it would seem she is into you but just don't come on too strong. Let her make the moves.

[Ell]

Originally Posted by Mkittan

UPDATE
She suddenly said that I owe her a cuddle because of a scary movie we watched earlier in the year. Is this a sure sign she likes me? 'Cause I don't recall people who are just friends normally cuddling.

It could mean that she likes you, or she could just be really comfortable with you. The only way you will know for sure is to ask

[Mkittan]

Wish me luck, school's in two days!

[dancingdoc2]

> She suddenly said that I owe her a cuddle because of a scary movie we watched earlier in the year. Is this a sure sign she likes me?

Please go to the Index, found at the top of the main screen and find the articles that discuss "Implied Consent". You can also do an advanced search using my name and this search term.

[Mkittan]

Woah, Not gonna have sex with her anytime soon LOL.

[dancingdoc2]

OH, COME ON NOW! I KNOW YOU ARE NOT GOING TO HAVE SEX.

The section I asked you to read about is "Implied Consent". Yes, the topic is buried in other material that is not pertinent, yet this is no reason to jump to conclusions--especially the wrong one. It's not unlike discussing examples for folding egg whites in recipes and asking you to get out a recipe for making waffles in which it directs you to "fold in the egg whites" into the batter. I'm not talking about waffles, only the section about the egg whites!

In your situation I wanted you to learn about managing your burgeoning relationship with this girl using Implied Consent so you could move foreward without questioning your every move or her motive or statements.

> She suddenly said that I owe her a cuddle because of a scary movie we watched earlier in the year. Is this a sure sign she likes me?
"IC" presumes that she has given you permission to cuddle with her and would not have said you owe her unless she wanted you to. You do not have to analyze her statement only accept the message and act upon it.

> I would go to great lengths to just hold her

This is why I asked you to read the information on IC. She said you owe her, you state you would, yet you are fumbling over "what if's" that are not in evidence in either statement. MAKE YOUR MOVE AND CUDDLE. Don't ask, just do because she has implied consent. You do not have to question and analyze what she said.

If you owe her a dinner, do not ask her "if she wants to go to dinner with you", state that you would like to take her to dinner and would Saturday at 7:00 be OK or would 7:30 be better (use whatever date and time(s) are appropriate.)

If you want to date her, assume she would like this also. You do not have to ask her if she wants to date because IC implies that she does or she would not be spending all this time with you when she could obvously be doing other things. Inform her that there is a movie or some other activity that you would like to do with her and ask if she is interested. If "yes", then set the date and time.

IC omits or bypasses the need to ask if "it" is OK, or, "do you want to". Assume that it is or she does unless or until she says no or provides an alternative to your proposal. Yes, I understand that as a guy you want the "dots connected and very close together" yet there are times when it is unnecessary to ask explicit questions and get explicit answers.

This is what I wanted you to get from reading the section on Implied Consent. Now, if and when you ever get to the point of kissing and making out, you can use the information for this when the time comes.

"You will find two very important concepts discussed in a couple of the articles on making out as well as in the forums. The first is that women set the boundaries for how far to go when making out, and, for how rapidly; second, is what is known as "Implied Consent". This means that consent to kiss, cuddle, hug, caress, etc., is implied up to some limit that she determines is comfortable for her at the time. IC means that we do not have to keep asking if it is OK to go "here" and do "this" or not. Assume you have her consent and proceed as if you have a green light up to the point where she stops you, says 'no' or suggests alternatives

How does this work for your relationship? Don't ask, just do, and see where your making out and explorations take you. Once she stops your progress, then you know her limit, all without having to discuss the matter. If you know she is interested in making out, then just go for it. If you are wondering if she is ready for more intimacy, then test the limit. If you are wondering if she is ready to go further than what you have been doing, test the previous limit and if she doesn't stop you then keep on keeping on and eventually you will reach her new limit when she stops you."