No Solution

[EvilEvilKitten]

Forget the Pornography!

Because it isn't real. Pornography, generally spekaking, is the male equivalent of the romance novel. Escapist media entertainment. Sex in the real world bears little resemblance to what's on the screen. So if you think what you're seeing is the only thing that "works" for you - you're wrong.

[RATED-RKOFRANKLIN]

Originally Posted by MIGHTY BOOSH

Ok dude, now I could be the last person in the world to give advice on women, I'm a year younger than you and just as (in)experienced but I'm getting better, more confident and almost everythings as I want it other than myskills with women.
Trust me dude when you're worse off then me you're in trouble so here's some advice

1. You're a wrestling fan, that's cool so am I (though I'm not that into it now) but that isn't exactly cool at your age, you can enjoy but don't go on about it so much. Oh and no one will like you for calling someone like Edge a WWE super star (even wrestling fans), if you're describing a wrestler just say "Edge" is a wrestler

2. Dragon Ball Z, I recomend you give that up, you can still play the video games but you're a little old for a cartoon, even if it is rather violent. NFL and stuff is cool though there's probably more nerdy stuff in your list of interests.
Every bloke I know plays video games, just don't talk about it that often, they should be a bit of fun not a hobby.

3. Being early for college and getting your work done is good but for God's sake DON'T brag about it!

4. Ok here's 2 options, take everything you like about yourself, e.g being funny maybe, forget look's it's your personality that counts. Take everything you like and in your head create a better more confident version of yourself then become that person.
If there's nothing about yourself you like (there must be smething) then look at someone you admire, like a wrestler and copy them a little, pick up body language (I would tell you to say pick up words they use aswell but with a wrestler you've got to be careful, don't say can you smell what Franklin is cooking or call your self the legand killer). If you pick a wrestler copy their confidence not their toughness

Things that improved my confidence were
1. Acting
2. GYM

Once I found a little confidence from acting it was easy to get more confident because I found all these great characteristics that were there all along. I find confidence unlocks your potential

You completely did not understood what I meant about being called the RATED-R-SUPERSTAR. I do not call myself that. My friends calls me that sometimes. I never go around acting like wrestlers. So please don't assume that I do! I am my own person.

I also do not brag about doing well in school! Please stop assuming things that are not true.

Originally Posted by dancingdoc2

This is another way of saying what I suggested in the other thread that he begin doing: acting his way to success. Thank you for the confirmation.



Not exactly. What we are suggesting is that you broaden your horizons and substitute "standards" for "horizons" or possibilities. You are all hung up on people measuring up to certain numbers on a measuring stick or tape measure. OK, for the sake of argument, let's say you do find five women who fit your criteria--now what? Let's say their personalities and other characteristics do not conform to what you really want to live with?

As for dating, please tell us who you will go out with? Must she first be able to fit within the size mold you have? If so, it is most likely your coffin (read: fate) you have sealed.

It seems to me that candidates must first posses certain iron clad physical attributes before you ever consider what each posses between the ears. I'm suggesting that you be less rigid and more flexible because the chances for finding someone you can love and live with long term will be greatly increased.

You are focused on a potential partner meeting certain physical criteria. I'm saying use these numbers as a guide, not an absolute. If as the old expression goes, you want a gal 5' 2", eyes of blue, with brown hair, don't quibble about being 5' 1" or 5' 4" with hazel eyes. Nor should you only accept one shade of brown hair. What if she decides to wear colored contacts or change the color and style of her hair do in a year? And, a C cup? I won't even go there, except to say what if she just happens to meet every other aspect you believe is crucially important yet does not fit that part of the mold?

What are you going to do when you finally unwrap the "package" and find a stray hair protruding from her cleavage? One breast larger than the other? A bigger or smaller patch of pubic hair than you believe is perfection? One or more skin blemishes? What if she has a laugh that drives you up the wall every time she cackles or who has a voice that can be heard down the street when she speaks normally, yet she meets every other criteria you have?

You do not have to date "just anyone", although, you certainly should not be as inflexible as you are. More importantly, you need to begin focusing on the real person (the brain that you do not see within whatever "package" stands before you) instead of the body image you see. Oh, and there is this, too: Do you envision your male ego getting a boost by walking beside her, hoping passersby will think to themselves, "wow, look at his 'catch'?" A lot of guys do have trophy partners just for this reason. Are you one?

One of the things I mentioned in your other thread is that what will see you through the years is not a particular body shape or style, it is your partner's mind. If you relax and expand the body style of a woman you will date, you may very well find the woman of your dreams on an intellectual and emotional level. You do not seem to understand this and this is why we are all so frustrated with you.

Unless and until you begin dating many women you won't fully appreciate who may rock your world. I probably said this to you before, and if not, many times to many others, that dating is all about learning what humanity has to offer us in a potential partner. In my never to be so humble opinion, you need to begin sifting through the potential candidates for what who and what she truly is, not what the package looks like. You are far too picky and intolerant. So, when it comes time for a person to fit inside your perfect mold, I'm recommending that you over size that mold a bit so that you do not severely limit the possibilities. If a woman can generally meet your physical criteria, then be happy. If she has a mind that intrigues and challenges and entertains you, then you have hit the jackpot--especially if she thinks you are God's gift, regardless of how you look. These women already know what we are attempting to get you to understand.

Sorry but my standards will stay the same. I do look at the heart of a person. I said this already. I look at physical body and the personality of the person.

I am not looking for a trophy wife. I am looking for someone to spend my life with. Someone who I can love and who can love me.

[EvilEvilKitten]

But Franklin - that is precisely what's WRONG!!

You are 19 years old and this is NOT the time to be looking for your life mate. DEFINITELY NOT.

Why? Because you will be another person entirely when you're 25 and what you like today will not be what you'll want then. I can guarantee it.

PEOPLE CHANGE OVER TIME

This especially true when they are virgins, just fresh out into the world, and completely inexperienced re: job, career, dating, children, paying taxes, paying bills, and doing all of the things fully fledged adults do.

Take a look at the long-term & married section and see how many people have regrets because they DIDN'T open up and fully explore their options and all that life has to offer BEFORE they settled into what they THOUGHT they wanted!

Do you want to be just like them?
Marry in haste: repent at leisure?

Or do you really want to find HER?
You won't unless you open up your mind , change your attitude, and get out there!

[RATED-RKOFRANKLIN]

I'm not looking for a "fling or a "one night stand". I want a real relationship. I don't expect to marry someone in just a few months. That is a big decision to make in life! I may date someone for two maybe three years before I want to marry them and other things have to fall into place as well.

I have my physical standards and I do have my personality standards. All of my standards are important and the woman must have all of them. I may like the body but I do not always like the personality(which I'm sure I said this already). If I do not like the personality than I'm not interested in her.

I see the advice people have given me. The advice is good for just about anyone. However I have done everything that has been advised to me. I don't talk about most of my hobbies to another woman unless she likes the same thing. I usually talk about what she likes and want to know more about it. When I ask women on dates I tell them that I am interested in them and ask them on a date. They always say no. I have perfectly fine friendships with men and women. I don't have many enemies. I try to be friends with alot of people. I love getting to know people because everyone is different! I'm funny, mature, nice to people, I give back, etc. I try to do the right things. Nothing works. That is why I'm asking for help. Every time someone gives me advice I have tried it or what they said is not true about me.

[Ell]

"When I ask women on dates I tell them that I am interested in them and ask them on a date. They always say no."

The "barbie doll" women that you want, are quite frankly out of your league... that's why they turn you down. You are gonna have to have realistic expectations because barbie wants ken & you are not ken.

If you met a woman who met all of your standards, except for "C cups" would you go out with her?

[RATED-RKOFRANKLIN]

Originally Posted by Ell

"When I ask women on dates I tell them that I am interested in them and ask them on a date. They always say no."

The "barbie doll" women that you want, are quite frankly out of your league... that's why they turn you down. You are gonna have to have realistic expectations because barbie wants ken & you are not ken.

If you met a woman who met all of your standards, except for "C cups" would you go out with her?

I would not go out with her. It is not just women who are my type who do not find me attractive. Women who are not my type do not find me attractive as well. As I said no one is attracted to me.

So I'm not good enough for my standards? I'm good enough for anyone. I have been told by friends, family, church family, family friends, random adults, etc that I am a good looking man. I've been told by some members here that I am average or a good looking guy. However attractive and unattractive women do not find me attractive.

[EvilEvilKitten]

Look at you! You talk of YOUR standards STILL despite everything we have told you about CHANGE YOUR FOCUS.

What are THEIR standards? Do you even have a clue?

[RATED-RKOFRANKLIN]

Well the women I have gotten to known as friends their standards are good man, funny, sweet, nice, well groomed, willing to listen, etc. They say looks are not important if the guy has a good heart and personality.

The women who rejected me each had different standards. Some say they don't look at the outside and only look at the inside. Others I did not know.

[Ell]

Originally Posted by RATED-RKOFRANKLIN

I would not go out with her. It is not just women who are my type who do not find me attractive. Women who are not my type do not find me attractive as well. As I said no one is attracted to me.

So I'm not good enough for my standards? I'm good enough for anyone. I have been told by friends, family, church family, family friends, random adults, etc that I am a good looking man. I've been told by some members here that I am average or a good looking guy. However attractive and unattractive women do not find me attractive.

Being in a REAL relationship is not about finding a "perfect woman", it's about finding a woman who is perfect for you. If you would not go out with someone who is otherwise perfect for you except for having C cups then in my opinion you are too shallow & immature to be in a relationship. I'm not saying that you need to go out with someone who you are not attracted to I'm saying that you need to get over your hang ups about women needing to look like porn stars to be attractive. Most real women do not look like that, and the few porn star types have HIGH standards that most men would not meet. So why do you set such high standards, that if reversed you yourself would not meet??? You are sabotaging yourself from finding someone with your unrealistic standards. As far as women not being attracted to you, work on it... change your look, work on your attitude, and work on your porn star expectations because a guy with your ideas about women's looks is very offending to women (even the porn star types). If I were you my standards would be an attractive woman with a nice personality, and by attractive I mean nice looking but not quite your standard of "perfect".

[LickMyGamete]

..don't Christian women generally want to wait for marriage until having sex? Sounds like you're ready for it, before even having met her! And you say you would go 2-3 years before marriage? ..really? Honestly, why worry about her boob size when you're not even gonna see them for 2-3 years..and don't you think just MAYBE within that time frame, you might grow to like her for I don't know..her personality or something crazy like that? What if years down the road she develops breast cancer and can't "tity fuck" you..gonna tell your paster "well she can't have sex with me the way I like it, so I'm leaving her."

Your thinking is very immature..beggars can't be choosers. You're like the man dying of starvation being offered a loaf of bread and replying.."..no thank you, can you get me some lobster instead?" ..no.

It's great that you have standards, but you have to weigh what you have to offer realistically into consideration...

And honestly - you're incredibly nerdy. It doesn't matter that you like rock music, a nerd listening to rock music is still a nerd. First impressions matter.