How long is the wait or when do you know?

[Lost one]

How much dating must be done before a physical (sexual as well) relationship can begin. I have never known this answer. How soon is too soon and how late is too late? Trying too soon (like I did) hurts but I would also be worried about going too long with no touching giving them impression I don't want it.

I ask people and the answers vary. Some go on the third date and others take a month or more. I have heard of some never having any. What is the best time to go for it with someone new.

[sera300]

3rd date for me; why? I only date people I am very interested in & I do not tend to date many men beyond the first date.

[goof'schik]

You and Sera are right, I either date a guy for months or years or just go out with him once. Now, this once may be my idea or his. Look for clues, hand holding, kisses goodnight or hello (french or pecks), what does she say?

[lnt1103]

Answers vary because people do. Take your cues from her-pay attention to mannerisms, comments, flirtation, etc. If you think you're getting signals, try something (I would start fairly mild) and see where you land.

[funinthesun]

I don't have a set timetable, but I'm very picky with women and the few significant relationships I've been in have happened very quickly(within the first week) where timing happened to be perfect and we truly connected right off the bat.

Aside from those, I'd be open to a fwb situation with someone due career circumstances, but I have yet to find someone I'm sufficiently attracted to and trust for something like that. The latter situation would probably arise with someone I spent a lot of time around to build a strong base of trust instead of a deep emotional connection.

[goof'schik]

If you can talk about birth control, any std history, and the such gives you a clue as to when the wait is over. If not, it's too soon.

[constantlylearning]

Now, that is good advice.........Bravo Chik.

[goof'schik]

If you can't talk about your histories you have no business getting naked. At least not with someone you want or claim to be building a relationship with.

[weasel]

it depends if you have to ask if it's been long enough or you aren't certain if the time is right then its not

[sera300]

Originally Posted by weasel

it depends if you have to ask if it's been long enough or you aren't certain if the time is right then its not

If you are confident in those you choose to date which look as potential future material, the answer is pretty obvious for the person. I do not date anyone I am not confident in; if he & I can get past the first date--the rest follows. Otherwise, if in question...might have a second date to really choose if we have similar values, respect, goals, etc. Sex? Well, that is part of getting to know the person you do enjoy company with & trust. At that time it's a matter of being safe.