Where do i go with all this... really confused....

[snowman]

I have been dating my gf for approx 14 months now and i just dont know what is wrong or which direction (if any) to take. I don't know if i have a problem that i need to sort out or if it is an actual relationship problem but whatever it is it is now having a bearing effect on us. For 1 i am the more sexually active one, from the onset in the back of my mind i thought this may be a problem with regards to me thinking sex is an important thing to have and experience within a relationship. This has then lead on to make me want sex on a regular basis. I don't know if that makes me a nympho or someone who may want to look into seeing someone on how to curb that enthusiasm for sex so much. This would then have a knock on effect in terms of me being moody etc which i know is bad and i did read on here that you should not bring your frustrations to light but i do find this hard and am working on ways to not show this.
I also recently am feeling kind of bored, i am not sure if this is because of what i have just explained but the interest is not the same with me as previously. I have other problems such as family and job etc which are all having bearing effect on me so i cant pinpoint it to be one thing but i dont know where to go with this one because only thing i am certain of is that i love my gf but dont know what is wrong with me. She has asked me many a time but i havent brought nothing up.

Any advice on this one. it may well be me just being stupid i dont knw.....

[goof'schik]

Go talk to someone, if your catholic a priest, or find a counselor to talk to. You may want to go on your own and you may want to include your gf. Just cause you take her once does not mean that she has to go everytime. And maybe she should go without you. You have to understand that relationships are hard, they take work every day, and that if that is something you both want then go. It is nothing to be ashamed of, alot of people go. And you and she have to understand what is said in that room stays in that room, if you don't bring her no questions and he same. What you want to share is up to the person that went. Good Luck.

[arutha]

Sex should be an important part of any healthy relationship, though things do tend to die down a bit and become more routine rather than exciting after a year or so. You really need to talk to her about it, tell her that you consider sex is important and want it more often. In every relationship though the two people are going to have different sex drives, you need to come to a compromise between the two of you. You might also try seducing her and turning her on more often, being more sexual and flirty. I make sexual comments all the time, and it means that my gf is constantly thinking of sex and associating me with sex so she has a sex drive pretty much as high as mine.

[EvilEvilKitten]

No you're not wrong to want sex in your relationships. I myself prefer 12 hours each week. There is NOTHING WRONG with you.

Waning interest in your gf after only 14 months however IS a problem and it may not actually be you. She has noticed a dwindling interest and asks and you say "I don't know" when actually, yeah you do know - you just told us -"family and job etc".

STRESS affects your level fo desire. In some it kills the desire for sex while in others it increases the desire for sex.

Next time when she asks, tell her "I'm stressing, hun."

I strongly encourage you to find some 'relaxation techniques' that you can use - usually heavy manual labor works for men - to reduce your stress levels.