could not deliver

[rlgates]

ok.. Well, thank you to all of those of you who have offered your help to me as late. To let you all know, my EX, well, lets say history repeat it self more then one way with her! HAHA

I have moved on.. Dating a great girl now. But, Dont know about somthing. Last night, we hooked up for the first time... DANM!! I have only had 2 lovers before this...but DAMN!!! I had no idea sex could be soo ****ing gooood!! We made out and **** for almost 2 hours.. Now, I get short winded very easely.. But, I have always been able to, deliver, before I get to the part. Not last night. Dont know why, but, I could not cumm. She said maybe we were both tired..ok, I will grant you that, it was like 1am in the morning, but, we try again this morning. Touching, rubing, a very good BJ. She must have worked on me for 20 min, NOTHING!

Anyone know if this could be just nerves, being tired or what? After she got up to shower cause she had to leave for work, I was able to pull one out in less then 5 min. Whats going on?

[dancingdoc2]

Are you limiting yourselves to oral stimulation or going on to intercourse?

Much has been written about the matter. I recommend reading appropriate articles listed in the Index. Also do a forum search on PA.

Performance Anxiety often crops up in new relationship and is a matter of worry. The fix, is to stop worrying, although, this can be harder than it seems. Confidence is key, both in the relationship and in self.

If you are just doing oral sex then read the article on this. The main reason other than PE that keeps a guy from achieving an orgasm is that oral stimulation as great as it is and as intense as it is is not the same type of stimulation that each of us relies upon to reach an orgasm. You have to provide feedback on how you are responding to her caresses and for what you need now. Also, as for manual/hand stimulation, you should take her hand in yours and guide her movements over the course of a few sessions until she learns to mimic your technique of rhythm, stroke, and pressures.

When we masturbate, we benefit from an internal feedback that lets us adjust on the fly what we are doing; this is missing when we turn the reins over to someone else, so, this is why it is important to give our partner feedback.

While she can probably bring you to climax from a hand job alone, oral stimulation is much more problematic. The best method is to use both and have her concentrate on the Frenulum and any other hot spots you have around the Corona rim.

[rlgates]

Are you limiting yourselves to oral stimulation or going on to intercourse?

no, it was with both, 12 mins of oral and almost 40 mins of intercourse!

[EvilEvilKitten]

Okay that's one problem - those numbers should have been reversed!

Spend the most time on foreplay and outercourse and only go for intercourse when you're about to orgasm - using the positioning time to calm down a bit.

Guys when we say "go all night" we do NOT mean on the one erection. We mean **** once, rest a bit, **** twice, take a break, **** three times - you get my drift?

Lots of laughter, lots of outercourse aka body worship, a few cookies, "Wow! your hair's a mess!", drinking water, and bit of snuggling here and there, ouch! a 'charlie horse'! - come on, this is real life and it is GREAT!

[rlgates]

well EEK, that 12 min of oral was after about 45 or so min of making out. Touching, feeling and the like, she LOVES forplay!

[dancingdoc2]

There is much helpful answers, hints and kinks listed here:

--BEGIN HERE--w/a Partial INDEX of Sex Info 101 Sex Ed. Topics

...and, found at the top of the main screen.

EEK is spot on. I've written much on the matter, mainly stating over and over, and again here, that fellas nowadays have the misguided misconception that lots and Lots and LOTS and LOTS of stroking and thrusting are the ways to work up an orgasm. WRONG. This is the purpose of lots of Foreplay and all the necking and petting that goes on the forty minutes beforehand.

Work up to close to the trigger point of an orgasm and then enter. Modulate your stroking and within ten minutes you should climax. Many women report back that if intercourse lasts longer than this they become SORE, bored, and tired. (A word to the wise.)

[EvilEvilKitten]

And so should you rigates! Foreplay is NOT just for the women! She should be giving you as good as you give her.