no friends

[duh477]

Im 20 and i have a few girls at work that I think like me but I dont really have any friends i know alot of people but i dont hang out with anyone I go to school work and home, work takes up most of my time, the girls are asking me what I do for fun and I just make stuff up, because its embarrassing is this a problem should I tell them I dont have friends so they will feel sorry for me or will they shy away because they think something is wrong with me, or is there something wrong with me?

[dancingdoc2]

1. Do not make up stories. It is hard to remember what you told to whom. Besides it is fibbing and this is not a good idea when you hope to begin a new friendship or relationship.

2. Involve yourself, time permitting, in clubs, social and/or sports organizations that interest you and in which girls also participate.

3. Network. Tell family and friends that you are interested in dating or making new friends and ask them to help you find guys and/or gals that may want to expand their circle of friends, also.

4. If you are busy with school, work, and home obligations, tell people that you do not have much time for socializing yet want to still expand your circle of friends and rearrange your schedule. If you find someone special to date, you'll be doing the latter anyway.

[sera300]

I agree w/Doc. Furthermore, you will find if you mention 'no plans tonight' to a female they will invite you to go with them. I would not lie or would I say 'I have no life'. You will find women will be good friends and get you around other's; their male friends included. Why? If you do not like another male friend which I asked along, mention something negative, I will be ticked off with the one with the poor behavior.

Flirt and go out with the ladies! And get to know their friends--males & females.

[EvilEvilKitten]

You could say "I'd like to be ....... But I don't really have enough time for it right now. What do you do for fun?" This is not lying nor is it 'no friends' which would signal your being 'lame'. Plus it gets the conversation going and gives you something more to talk about that might lead up to her inviting you along as per Sera.

[sera300]

Dear Duh:

One problem you have is you have obligations, whereas those you may be around do not--or at least not to the same degree. Or at best to the same extent you do.

So you have limited time, many of my friends do as well; all ages and all types. Often I find myself wanting to go with a friend or someone to "something or an event" [best I can say here]. If a man told me he was busy in life; I would ask him to see if he could free up to go with me to 3 separate 'outings'. Why? he is fun, I want company, and the majority of things I get to go to are because I am friends with many.

I went to see a good friend who is 'touring' because I am also affiliated with the private organization. Had 4 tickets; other friends were out of town, so took a few of other's who were able to close a business for the day to go.

Nice part is the three of us had the chance to go on side of the stage, talk & catch up. The friends touring have to pull out to go upstate, I was able to get the tickets because it was a private hire, and the two I took with me, I trust, passed security clearance. They were a bit surprised I did know these people & all had a nice day! The ones 'touring' were happy to see people they know & trust--not women or men throwing themselves at them! Just people who liked their music and their dedication, admired the dedication, & shared similar ambitions. No one WITH ME wanted anything FROM them...just enjoyed a chat and friendship. YOU LEARN TO NETWORK.

Trying to find people to just go out with since everyone is busy in some capacity is difficult. Often women want company, nothing else attached, so saying I'd like to do this or that but have limited time? You get invites.

Now, what you do with those you meet after the invites is up to you! Make friends or not. Find a person of interest or not....

Always say please, thank you, and smile...

Organizations are good to meet other's as well but you need to let those know you time is limited & preparations for things need to be worked into your schedule--not last minute.

Volunteer at you local animal shelter [a no kill one] just walking a dog...you will meet many people!