a few questions?

[Sloogigan]

my self (im 23) and my girlfriend (she 21) can only See each other once a week as she is a single mom (hes 2) who lives at home with her parents. she wont tell them she is meeting me so i cant call in to see her. We have been going out nearly a year now. Also she is in her last year of collage training to be a teacher so has even less free time.
We talk every night But the longer we go with out seeing each other the more we fight over the sillyest things.

1: phone sex, she has brought this up a few times but i have no idea what to say? any idea or tips would be nice coz im clue-less

2a: how offen do normal cuples have sex? We have at sex at least once a every 2 weeks. Which is fine by her but Id like it more. Am I just greedy or does she have a low sex drive.

[machine_rat]

First off, I'm curious as to why she can't tell her parents she's seeing you?

Do they not like you personally, or is she under some sort of 'probation' to where she isn't allowed to see anybody while living under their roof.

[EvilEvilKitten]

It sounds like she's a timid woman which explains almost everything. Timid women generally hide from themselves, their parents, their boyfriends - everyone out of fear of being rejected. It is not a rational fear. The family dynamic may also be playing into this. Having one child already and no husband, may be seen as an 'error' on her part and so she's being closely held to prevent any more 'errors' from occuring. I am just speculating however. You will have to ask her.

Her sex drive is normal for a timid woman. Your sex drive is normal for a male your age. Perhaps once she is out on her own and working, she may regain some of her libido: she may or she may not.

As to phone sex, you tell her what you would do with her. Feel free to write down a scenario and then read it to her over the phone.

[Sloogigan]

To machine_rat :
Ive met her parents and thought we got on well enough however we had a fight and broke up for about a week. She told her parents we broke up and now wont tell them we got back together. (the fight was over 6months ago) Acording to her its not that they dont like me they think Im just "not right for her"
So I cant ring the house or call over. Every time she is with me she lies to them. I worry what she is lieing to me about?

To EvilEvilKitten:
Is there any thing I can do to help her be less timid? she is the sweetest girl Ive ever known I just find this 1day a week relationship hard.

[sera300]

If her parents deemed you not correct for her; see in what way. Then, I have to say it sounds as if they are so over-protecting of her. She is home, fine, establishing her career with college, they are afraid to let her live again and around you since she has a clear goal in their minds. Why you split for a week, I wonder what she said to her parents.

Now, it's up to her to talk to them & stand up---not you. Seriously at some point they need to allow her to make her own choices again HOWEVER, none of the above you can force. Is this really something you are dead serious about? Do you see a future with her? Or is she just fun? Why? If this is a no-go you might be best off cutting her loose---unless you are happy living "in the closet forever".

[EvilEvilKitten]

Not a thing! Sorry, but only she can decide that "enough is enough".

[Sloogigan]

Thanks for the new look at things. They are over protective But they take advantage of her. coz they help look after her son so she can go to collage she feels like she owes them and lets them control her.
I wish I could help but she says not ready for me so spend time with her son yet gets cross if I dont ask about him. Some times I feel as if she is trying to push me away.
Im crazy about this girl and if 1day a week is all she has then I indend to enjoy that day to the fullest.
I know I have to let she deal with her parents in her own time. I just dont have to like it.
Thanks again for listening

[Jasons_Lady]

Hi I can sympathize with you. I have been with my boyfrined for over 3 years and due to circumstances haven't seen him for a month. His mother and sister are not fond of me, as for his dad he's cool but the mother rules the roost even from 110 miles away. No offense I think that's just the whole mother and son bond. I was until recently kept hidden, I am 34 and he's 30. He comes from a extrmely close knit family. I feel for ya!! My suggestion is if this is the real thing with you and your girlfriend hang in their and have undying Faith. If not cut your losses as harsh as it sounds. Keep in mind if it's true love, love does and will conquer all, I have learned that 1st hand and am still abiding by those very feelings.
Best of luck to you, everything will work out