Really aggrevated about something please help

[PistolSmoke]

Ok ive have been dating my gf for 2 months now. Im a virgin she is not(she had one before) We fool around all the time, were in love and i want to have sex with her. She recently started BS and im glad about it. My parents are out of town this weekend and shes spending the night at my house. But she told me "dont expect anything, cuz im not ready yet, i want it but then i dont" and im thinking wtf?

It really pisses me off that shes not "ready" how can a women not be "ready". This is THE most perfect time for us to do it, chances like these never come up and she knows they dont come up and she dont want to.

Long time ago when she was in love with her ex they were broken up and still had sex with him b/c she "loved" him. Im confused why she can have sex with him when they werent dating; on the contrast, she dont want to yet with me cuz shes not ready.

Need some help from the guys and gals please. Your imput, thoughts, what should i do? i really want to have sex with her not b/c im a virgin but b/c i love her and i told her that to

[EvilEvilKitten]

OMG! Can you PLEASE stop thinking ONLY of yourself? Yeah, yeah, yeah, it is the perfect time etc. and so forth - FOR YOU. But it might not be that way for her. If you haven't learned it yet - learn it now, when it comes to sex: WOMEN RULE. If she says NO, then it is No.

This lady requires an emotional investment in you on her part. She is not yet ready to do that. Most likely she feels that it is too damn soon in your relationship for sex. This indicates that she is a romantically- minded lady who takes her relationships to heart.

Any pushing or cajoling or talking her into it will only "prove" to her that all you want is her body. So DON'T push, cajole, or try to talk her into it. You have undoubtedly heard "guys only want sex" or "men just want sex". Well, that's why - because they push for it and end up looking like 'desperate to get their rocks off'.

It is NOT enough to say "I love you". That's not the point. SHE is NOT yet ready to have sex with you. That's the point.

What to do about it? Relax, and let her decide. Do nothing but let her know that you are available for her. That's all you have to do. Let her lead. Your attitude should be: if she wants you, YIPPEE!. If she does not, that's also fine.

Got it?

[PistolSmoke]

That is gay b/c i have alot more to lose if we have sex then she does. It pisses me off how she tells me that having sex this weekend will be perfect and the change her mind like that! its torchure and it is pissing me off. We fool around to the point where all we need to do is slip on the condom and then we dont do anyhting after that.

o btw i thank u for ur imput but dont be a smart ass about it cuz im new at this and what goes on in womens heads, so please dont give me an attitude.

[Sexless Loser]

Wow, you've been dating her for 2 months and you expect her to jump in bed with you the first chance she gets?! She doesn't want to jump the gun, she wants to wait till she's on a real emotional level with you before having sex with you. If you wait for that, it will be better for her AND you. Push her to have sex, she won't be into it and that will lessen your pleasure.

[PistolSmoke]

we were technaclly dating for 5 months but we werent "offical" till 2 months ago.

[nuttychick]

Originally Posted by PistolSmoke

o btw i thank u for ur imput but dont be a smart ass about it cuz im new at this and what goes on in womens heads, so please dont give me an attitude.

Now little man that was a big mistake.. you need to lose the "Im a big boy" attitude and listen to EvilEvilKitten she is one of the most brilliant minds on here. so sit down shut up and learn.. I can assure it will bring you many of years of pleasure

[Ducy]

EEK...please please PLEASE let me tear this kid a new one...I've had a bad day and it would be great to blow off some steam...

Forget it Im doing it anyways...but pg-13 of course...

Originally Posted by PistolSmoke

That is gay b/c i have alot more to lose if we have sex then she does.

What on earth do YOU have to lose? Your virginity? Whoop De FREAKING DOOO! Your virginity isnt anything. Its not some little piece of paper that you are given at birth...its not a feeling...its simply a state of mind. Guess what your girlfriend could lose...

A life....when the condom breaks and she gets pregnant. And then has to take care of the kid on her own cuz you skip out.(BCP or not there is always a chance...especially someone such as your self who has never worn a condom for sex so your odds for perfect use are like...well 0)

Respect and love for you when you force her into it and she does it to make you happy and then is crushed cuz she believed you loved her but now thinks you are only using her for sex.

And just because you have had 1 sexual partner doesnt mean you'll just jump in the sac with anyone. The fact that she had sex with her ex and not you shows one thing...it was a comfort thing. Yeah she loved and had sex with him but loves you yet wont have sex....guess what. It means she isnt totally comfortable with that idea. She had sex out of comfort and more than likely wanting him back. With you...well she loves you but she isnt ready to share that with you yet...and you should be thankful because sex can really mess with a relationship if it isnt strong enough

Originally Posted by PistolSmoke

It pisses me off how she tells me that having sex this weekend will be perfect and the change her mind like that! its torchure and it is pissing me off.

Poor pitiful you...wha wha your girlfriend wont have sex...does she refuse to change your diaper too? BFD she changes her mind...and you say she says having sex would be perfect...maybe since your parents are out of town but it isnt perfect as far as she isnt ready...it would be perfect time but not perfect for her. And its torture? No littl kid torture is waiting for your next period because your not sure since its your first time and you dont know what to expect. Torture is when she is a day or two late...Torture is when the relationship faulters because you were to damn lazy to build a relationship first.

Originally Posted by PistolSmoke

We fool around to the point where all we need to do is slip on the condom and then we dont do anyhting after that.

So? Yea guess what...me and my girlfriend fooled around for almost 5 months...to the point that we would be rubbing penis against clit (through her panties...yes I know now that it can lead to pregnancy) She would tell me how bad she wanted me in her...and we had at least 20 perfect opportunities to have sex...but we didnt she had no problem fooling around but even though she wanted to feel me inside her...she wasnt emotionally ready. She still needed to know that the relationship was strong and I wouldnt leave after (both were virgins as well)

Originally Posted by PistolSmoke

o btw i thank u for ur imput but dont be a smart ass about it cuz im new at this and what goes on in womens heads, so please dont give me an attitude.

Who cares that your new at this? She didnt give you a smart ass answer. She told you the truth...YOU ARE A LITTLE BABY....Whaaa...my girlfriend wont have sex with me...yet shes had sex before....

Here is some free advice....just cause a woman has sex once doesnt make her a whore who will jump in the sack with you cuz you "love" her....hell you probably dont know what love is because it sounds you are a bit too immature.

Originally Posted by PistolSmoke

It really pisses me off that shes not "ready" how can a women not be "ready". This is THE most perfect time for us to do it, chances like these never come up and she knows they dont come up and she dont want to.

This...well this is too freakin dumb to answer but I will do it anyways....Just because the timing is good and its a one in a million opportunity doesnt mean that you should...just cuz a company gives you a one in a million chance to buy their company at half price doesnt mean you should (I mean the company could probably go under) And woman dont just get "ready" If you read anything on this site you would know women take a lot to be ready...guys see cleavage and you are up and ready...woman need kissing, touching, and even emotional attachment (before they learn to seperate sex and love)

Originally Posted by PistolSmoke

i really want to have sex with her not b/c im a virgin but b/c i love her and i told her that to

Yea....RIGHT...if you loved her you wouldn't be throwing a tantrum cuz she wont let you have sex.


By the way you lucked out...if I didnt want to listen to EEK destroy you, I wouldnt have painstakingly erased every profane word from this reply....and believe me...it would make south park look like a christian prayer show.

Originally Posted by PistolSmoke

This is THE most perfect time for us to do it,

By the way kid...learn to capitalize properly....it should be the MOST not THE most...aye yi yi

[EvilEvilKitten]

Hey PistolSmoke - SUCK IT UP, buddy. I told you the truth. Point blank. No hints. No innuendo. If you really were a "big boy" then you'd be able to take it. You want to know what goes on in a woman's head - I TOLD YOU what she's thinking. If you do not want to accept it - that is just too damn bad.

The lady changes her mind because YOU ARE PUSHING her and she is finding it repellant. When you ease up, she relaxes and thinks "maybe". Then you push and she freezes up again. STOP PUSHING.

*blunt force trauma to your head*

The attitude is necessary to get the message through your thick head

STOP PUSHING HER TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU BEFORE SHE'S READY.
LET HER TELL YOU WHEN.

Jeez, I even told you how to act around her and what to say to her and yet you throw my advice out because you didn't like my attitude!?! What do you care about my attitude? You should be asking yourself "Does she know what she's talking about?" instead. The answer to that is YES. With 40 years of a vastly wider experience than most - I do know.

"That is gay" ???? Oh man, you have so much to learn! Listen to me. The most sexually successful men NEVER push a woman to have sex with them. They calmly sit there, being friendly, and simply ooze testosterone - thus letting the women know, silently, that they'd be honored if the woman would "pick up his option". These men leave the decision entirely up to her. There is absolutely NOTHING at all "gay" about them either. *chuckling* Oh my no! Yet they can draw women to them from across a crowded room without even saying a word.

[sera300]

Simply put she is not going to get into a sexual relationship at this time with you. There is no explanation. Its just the way she feels about it...

[PistolSmoke]

im sry for even bringing it up. I feel like a pig, and i should feel like it. THANK YOU for the advice. And even tho you guys kinda blu up on me it was a good thing b/c it woke me up. Again im sry and i thank u for the advice everyone. I will let time take its course.