sex drive is out of gas

[Kendogg531]

Well...to start off im 17 and so is my gf, we have bine together for about 8 months and i can say that we are both completely in love with each other......there are no problems in the relationship other then her sex drive..it ****in sucks thats the only way i can put it lol...we have sex alot and it is good sex but she even said that sex is the last thing on her mind...the other nite after we were done having sex i asked her if she has ever had any sexual fantasys or ne thing an she said no....idk...maybe her sex drive sucks because of her stress levels or w.e

She sais im addicted to sex but i no shes just joking..i do love sex tho....i love pussy in general


another thing is shes never had an orgasm...shes had sex with 1 other person besides me an she said im alot better then him and i belive her becouse we are very honest ...i just wish she was a little more into sex ...can anyone give me some adive???? thank u<3

[Ducy]

I honestly think every woman has the ability to truly enjoy, and think about sex...like a man lol. Do what EEK suggested, BODY WORSHIP.

You have to show her the pleasure you can get from sex and foreplay. I mean if you never had an orgasm through sex, or foreplay would you want it? I know I wouldnt. Have her masturbate, by herself since she will probably be nervous, and let her keep trying until she finally has one. (dont stress or force cuz it will never happen then) once she knows what makes her cum, she can show you so that when you have sex you can do it.

Remember the secret to good sex...practice makes perfect, and it has never been so much fun!

[Brandye]

Another bit of advice saying the man has to "show her the pleasure." This desire has to come from within and there are no magic moves with which a man can make a woman sexual. I f she wants to develop this part of herself (and she would benefit from it), she has to take the initiative. You can recommend reading (Our Bodies Our Selves; The Joy of Sex) or websites (sexinfo101; clitical.com) but until she discovers the wonders of orgasm (usually through masturbation and sometimes almost accidentally), there is not much else you can do.

There are women who go their entire lives accepting but not really wanting sex.

Afterthought: It does not sound like she ran out of gas; it sounds like she never fueled up.

[Ducy]

Sorry Brandye, I know that we dont give orgasms and stuff away, and that you personally cant increase someones sex drive. (Although it would be interesting if you could lol)

I meant it more as...help her work towards it, and show her that its good to feel good, like you teach a kid that touching a dead animal is bad, you show her that it is good or okay...i.e. having fun, being relaxed, none of the "oh it has to be like this" mentality.

Sorry for the misprint. And ken Brandye is right, there are women who enjoy sex, dont mind having it regularly, but there almost never going to initiate it, unless you get lucky enough and something happens to strike a chord and turn her on. (my friend/ex/whatever else is like that. When we had sex I would have to initiate, and there was only one time when she intiated, and when she was done I couldnt get it up for a week and really didnt care for it for about a month lol )

[dancingdoc2]

> we have sex alot and it is good sex but she even said that sex is the last thing on her mind...the other nite after we were done having sex i asked her if she has ever had any sexual fantasys or ne thing an she said no....idk...maybe her sex drive sucks because of her stress levels or w.e

I'm confused: you begin by saying the two of you have sex a lot, then end by stating that her sex drive sucks. Please tell us what I'm not understanding. Having a fantasy or not has no connection to sex drive as far as I know.

> She sais im addicted to sex but i no shes just joking..i do love sex tho....i love pussy in general

Your "addiction" or interest in all this is only going to become more acute and intense. Nineteen is when the male of the species is considered to have achieved his peak. From then on until death, it is all downhill, albeit very very slight for the next couple of decades. Females of the species reach their sexual peak during their early thirties. Don't try to figure out Mother Nature, except to know that when a couple are in their thirties, their respective drives pretty much equal each other's.

Now, having said all this, here is an analogy for you. If you give a basket to a man and another to a woman and ask them to collect some eggs, a man will have just a few eggs in it, whereas a woman will have a dozen or more. The eggs represent emotional and social involvements. A man pretty much makes the woman in his life his focus and is emotionally and physically placing most of his energy into these. A woman it has been said has many more interests and outlets and support. So while she is connected to her man, and can be devastated by divorce, death, medical issues, or one of life's many traumas, it generally does not affect her as much as something similar affects him. She has more eggs meaning more interest and resources than he.

> another thing is shes never had an orgasm.

Please read the following articles, separately or together:

The Anatomy of the Female "O", Answered by Brandye & Dancingdoc2 & Inspired by Godiva

For Women Only- Help! Why Can't He Make Me Orgasm?

How Do I Get Him/Her to Orgasm From a Hand/Blow Job?

Here is an additional resource the two of you should read:

Female Sexual Response

> i just wish she was a little more into sex ...can anyone give me some adive?

Asked and answered. To recap, your drive is much higher than hers at this stage of life. Orgasms per se are not mandatory for women, enjoyable and desirable as they are. Couple this with the fact that she has more diversification in her interests with more or less intensity assigned to each. Lastly, it may be that she places more importance on romance than s.e.x. I suggest that you place more emphasis on romance followed by more emphasis on snuggling and cuddling and less importance on foreplay, not that you cannot do this. Before you do, devote a lot of time to making out--Necking, Petting, and all that before getting to actual Foreplay. I'm just saying that you may find you get more of what is important to you by focusing upon what is more important to her right now.

Body Worship How-To by EEK

[Kendogg531]

we have sex alot but only becuase i want to....if i didnt want to we would never have sex because shes just is never in the mood unless i do things to make her want to

[Kendogg531]

oh nd doc iv read all of those...iv bin on this website for almost a year now....iv read just about everything

[dancingdoc2]

> we have sex alot but only becuase i want to....if i didnt want to we would never have sex because shes just is never in the mood unless i do things to make her want to

Thank you very much, Ken, for the additional information. I wish you had included this first point but not to worry as my reply will surely be helpful to a number of readers looking over our shoulders.

It is this last part that I recapped in the last paragraph. You may just find that by concentrating on the lovey dovey stuff and less on the sex part that you'll both get what you want in the end. As for your hope that she will take more initiative or show more initial interest, I think this is something only time will help. She might be shy or timid concerning this aspect of her life, religious or moral teachings may play a part, her biology, as well as just needing time to grow and evolve as a maturing young lady.

As for never having had an orgasm, well, the information you read and I presented, above is what she needs to understand and to take advantage of. If she is not interested in pursuing it then there is nothing you can do. Just understand and be happy knowing that if she is happy making love yet not having an orgasm that this is good in an of itself. If she is interested in practicing in order to make the transmutation into an orgasmic being and discovers that she can indeed have orgasms, learns to do so reliably and consistently, then progress can be made.

[Kendogg531]

i think shes scared of having an orgasm...i think that she thinks that sex is only to please me...i wish she'd understand that sex is just as much for me as her....i just need to talk to her.....and thats alot harder than ud think

[machine_rat]

Does your girlfriend have any difficulties showing her emotions? Some people come from homes where the parents (if present) don't show eachother much affection, and in turn feel awkward showing emotions.