Learning to Dance

[-wittyphrasehere-]

My sister's wedding day taught me how inarticulate I am at dancing.
Knowing that many girls like partners who can cut the rug, anyone have any advice on dancing for a beginner? Especially for an 18 year old?

[sera300]

Look for Ballroom dance classes which incorporate Salsa or Latino dancing...many gyms are offering these classes with no partner required. Plus, learning proper Ballroom technique will allow you to dance well at a wedding, attract women to you, and if you walk away with versions of the "Box step" it can be adapted to any dance. And it's fun!

I am no "wonder" on the dance floor but had a blast when I would go to Puerto Rico and dance on vacation after taking classes...

I am sure Doc can add much to this!

[dancingdoc2]

> anyone have any advice on dancing for a beginner? Especially for an 18 year old?

You are so right, knowing how to dance is a very good asset to have and many a woman values a man with this knowledge, whether he is a rank beginner, experienced, or an advanced dancer. Ballroom dancing is an umbrella term that encompasses a lot of dances like Waltz, Foxtrot, Tango, Nightclub Two Step, Merengue, East Coast Swing, West Coast Swing, Hustle; the Latins: Mambo, Samba, Cha-Cha, Rumba, Bolero--just to name a few. A person can learn any or all.

Dancing knows no age. High school and particularly college students are regulars at our weekly dances; so too are older people including the young at heart! We are in it for the sport, and the fun, and the challenge. Dancing is a social activity so you will regularly find people of different ages dancing together. Think of this as a three minute relationship or a partnership in which the couple works as a team for the length of the song.

A major metropolis should have at least one studio and often more. Here in the greater Sacramento area there are five major studios along with several independent instructors, some of whom teach through the various Parks and Recreation districts. If you live in or close to a big city I suggest looking into one of the studios. If you live in a smaller community or are limited on funds, consider the Rec. departments. Some colleges offer dance classes either through the P.E. departments or Adult Ed.

Group lessons provide an economical way to acquire skills.
Private lessons will move you along faster, yet are pricey.
A good mix is to take a series of group lessons and then a
private lesson once in a while in order to hone your skills
and to work on technique and styling, not to mention correcting
any bad habits.

When I began taking lessons, my wife was working full time and going to school at night. Each semester she would take a fun class--you know: basket weaving, cake decorating, photography, etc. One evening she walked in and announced that she had signed up to take Ballroom lessons and would I do so, also. I did, and have been having a ball ever since. Now, having said that, I did have the misconception that I'd know all there was to know in a semester and this simply is not the case. It takes time to learn to dance and once you get beyond the basics in a few dances, you can then continue to take lessons for as long as you live and have discretionary income! So, you can learn just enough to get you by for the occasional dancing you might do, or, you can learn more if you want to dance frequently and regularly. While there is no end, a person can opt to stop learning at any point along the way.

In the meantime, spend some time searching YouTube for video clips of lessons. I did a search on "Waltz lesson", "Foxtrot Lesson" and a few others and found some beginning information as well as advanced. The videos demonstrate dance patterns or steps but do not teach the "mechanics" required such as lead and follow, and other required stuff. By watching these clips you will gain an appreciation of what is involved and can see what is involved.

If you have additional questions or concerns, please IM me.

I hope this is of help. Enjoy!!

[sera300]

Easy on us Cake decorators! When I was 13, I was not able to work due to labor laws, learned to decorate & sculpted flowers, each was photographed, provided a great income (supply & demand). This taught patients, creative skills and entrepreneurial skills. Kept up with it as an outlet over the years & it's a talent which had become more professionally defined! Lack of time is my limitation!

Dancing skills are very similar! Never lost once you learn and are limitless!

[Ephemera]

Hm.

The girl friend would love for me to take classes.

I'm not exactly a dancing super star.

Maybe I'll bring it up.

[EvilEvilKitten]

Besides being fun, dancing is a great way to communicate your skills in "horizontal endeavors" as in how well the man moves and knows where his parts are at any given moment.

[dancingdoc2]

Originally Posted by Ephemera

Hm.

The girl friend would love for me to take classes.

I'm not exactly a dancing super star.

Maybe I'll bring it up.

OK, now here is the bottom line:

Were you an instant and confident bike rider when you first sat upon one as a kid and wobbled down the driveway? Same goes for other endeavors.

We all walk into the dance studio as neophytes with two left feet. As for me, I not only had two left feet, but am also left handed and this means that the hemispheres of my brain are also reversed--AND
I LEARNED TO DANCE! This is just your Fragile Male Ego getting in the way.

I also earned a commercial pilot's license and I'm here to tell you that learning to fly while not particularly difficult requires a person have a major internal dialog with his alter ego before taking that first lesson unless you are a Type A personality type.

As for taking lessons, you can certainly "bring it up" to your girlfriend and then seek out a studio or other venue as mentioned. Another approach is for you to take lessons alone and after you have learned a thing or two or twenty--surprise her, and then continue on together. Whatever works.

If I was to venture a guess, it would be that only 1% of all the people I've taught failed to "get it" and failed to acquire adequate skills. Just don't let your Fragile Male Ego get in the way because if you do, it will put thoughts in your brain like: "I have to perform perfectly and because I can't I'm not going to embarrass myself by even trying", or, "I know I'm not as good and graceful as those other guys I see, so I think I'll just sit here and watch everybody else". I tell each first time student two things: first, that nobody is watching you; second, that when you go to a dance, go to practice. The mind set is that if you go and practice you are then free to flub up and make some mistakes yet can laugh them off and go on. If you go to a dance to dance, this often makes a guy think he is "on" and has to perform flawlessly which he knows is not a possibility at this stage of the game, thus his ego sets himself up for failure.

All dance forms, be it Ballroom, Swing, Salsa, C&W, Square, Round, Folk, etc., are alive and well. The health of these dance activities comes from all the new people of all ages wanting to join in and learn. Skills come with time and practice. You won't be Fred Astaire, Arthur Murray, or Gene Kelly, in a couple of months, although, as the two of you continue to go out practicing you will find yourself having fun all the while improving your skills.

[Brandye]

I think we tripped Doc's trigger!!

[-wittyphrasehere-]

Originally Posted by dancingdoc2

I hope this is of help. Enjoy!!

Helpful and informative as aways, doc.
Hats off to you, and I shall start looking for classes immediately.

[oedipussy]

While I sure DancingDoc knows a hell of a lot more about this than I do, I'm gonna go in a different direction based on my experiences... Classes are a little too impersonal for my tastes.

Surely you know a pretty girl that would be willing to spend a night showing you some moves? Dim the lights, pop open your classiest box of wine, put on a record and let her guide you through it. Seems like girls know how to dance straight out of the womb...

The night I learned to dance (and I use the term "learned" loosely as I can't even spell the dances she showed me, let alone remember how they went), it was with my current interest 2 years ago or so. During a night of drinking she mentioned she wanted to go out dancing but her boyfriend at the time didn't want to. I told I'd take her if I knew how, and she proceeded to teach me. One of the best nights of my life...

Well, that story was pretty much pointless, but now that I'm all nostalgic I'm gonna go back to bed...