what does she want?

[orodel]

okay heres my situation: Last school year (college) a girl and myself fooled around with each other. Shes a very shy girl and obviously has problems just having conversations with people. She slept at my place a few times and myself at hers and the furthest we got was making out. She seemed timid to call me a lot but I think when she worked up the courage she would and want to meet up. TImes when I tried calling her she would not answer or answer and seem very timid and almost afraid to talk to me. After awhile she told me she was just looking for friendship and thought I was looking for more. So I decided to just give up and try and forget about her.

last few months of school passed and then the summer

We get back to school and the first night one of her friends tells me that she really wanted to see me and decided she wanted to get to know me better this year. I kinda shrugged it off and went along. Then the next night she actually calls me and wants to meet up. We did, eventually went back to my place. We started making out, then clothes came off, a played with her and fingered her for awhile.... unfortunately this ended when my drunken roommate returned. He didnt get what was going on and passed out on his bed.

She still seems timid to talk to me and pretty much the same deal as last year (so far)

Is this just a shy girl thats afraid to get involved or is this a girl that just calls me when shes horny? I know its impossible to tell for sure for someone reading this post off the internet but figured I wanted to hear people's opinions.

I REALLY like this girl. She beautiful! I definately dont like her just for the chase or more like I know if I dont pursue her (even though shes difficult) that I'm going to regret it. To complicate things further there is another girl thats definately interested in me. I do like her too but not as much as the first girl. I dont mean for her to be a backup plan but really dont want to waste my last year of school)

thanks for any input, I appreciate it a lot!

[sera300]

Don't waste your last year of College getting attached; and if her social skills are lacking then I would re-think the situation w/her, sounds as if you are inheriting a royal mess. Play the field, if she comes around & opens up fine; if not then you know she may have issues you will not want to deal with.

If she is this much of a social introvert, imagine her attempting to enter the workplace. Is this what you want to deal with? I'd say, keep her at a distance, get to know her if you want but not exclusively. In other words; play the field.

[oedipussy]

As for your question, it sounds like she's confused as to how she feels about you.

You need to follow your heart on this one. If she's the girl you want, you've gotta go through all the confusion, pain, and heartbreak and try as hard as you can. Love is rough. It's never easy. Be strong, confident, and vocal about what you want and how you feel - right now you two are just playing games. Since she seems to lack intiative, you need to be OK with always having to compensate for that and take the lead. If you're not willing to, you may as well just go for the "safe" girl. But you said yourself that you would regret not pursuing the one that you want, and regret is a hard thing to live with. The easy way is generally not the best way...

Honestly I just went through a similar situation. Things are changing now though and it was definitely worth it. Just keep trying - it'll probably end up being worth it for you too.

[EvilEvilKitten]

Forget about "back-up plans". Date them both!

[orodel]

dating both of them definately wouldnt work.... they are friends

[EvilEvilKitten]

I don't know - could be kinky.
You should expand your social circle.