Work Fling

[FernT43]

My rocky, 10-year marriage ended two years ago. No kids. The last two years have been depressing. I gained weight and let my self go. Haven’t been with a man since. And since the last 8-years of my marriage we practically passionless, I’ve been sexless for nearly a decade. (Not quite, since my husband and I managed to get around to it on VERY rare okasssions.

All that changed recently at a drunken company Christmas party, when I hookd up with a coworker. Since then we’ve beevfbn slpng with each other regularly (Only the first time was durkcnen. Much better sober). I’ve had more sax in the past three months then I have in the last 10 years.

Unfortunately, there are major concerns:

Positives:
• It’s been wonderful physically and emotnlly and not to mention for my self esteem. I feel like I was deprived of fun and excitement. He is 15 years younger then me! Hss energy is incredle. He blows my ex away.
• Don’t laugh please. Ive never had casual or forbidden sexy (in the sense that work would frown on it). The sneakiness, for both of uses, is part of the thrill. We’ve done things during work, butt not at work. I live four miles from the office. We’ve scheduled “sales calls” and gone to my place.
• No strings attached. We’ve both been open and honest. We’re not interested in a long-term relationship. For me, the agree thing is a major issue. I can’t see myself being with someone that yng. He’s a boy. (Not legally LOL). Might work for some. I would not knock it.. It’s just not for me.

Negatives
• WORK: That’s the biggest issue. I’m hiss boss. I mange a staff of 10. I fully recovinze this is unfair to the other 9 and the entire company. Since, I’m hiss boss, his “sales calls” get approved. I he to gives him shies review, bonus and rays next month. I want to give him a stellar report. Should I? He’s problay not worth it, work wise.
• Are we being fair to each other?
• No stings attached. Yes. I listed that as a positive. But I’m also realistic. Can’t this only end badly? And problaky for me. He’s young and hot. I’m old and fat. He’s going to find something more sonorous eventually. That’s when I’m likely to get ryhurt.

What should I do?
End it. Quit while I’m ahead.
Keep going; enjoy it and ideal with repercussions leather.
Other?

Give him a good bonus?

on a side note: I’d like to tell my ex how my worlds been rocked like never before. He used to say that the trouble with our sx life was my lack of effort and coldness. That’s not what this young buck says.

[HardNgood]

I hope you guys don't work at a publishing company!!! LOL...anyways..you both understand it's not a long term thing..so enjoy the ride while you have it..or HE should enjoy the ride as long as you let him...FORGET about the bonus stuff..keep the business part business..although that might be a bit late...if your happy that is what counts...he'll rebound when it ends..in the mean time try to get back into shape and you'll be ready to take on some more!

[Brandye]

If you end it, what is the worst thing can happen?
If you continue, what is the worst thing can happen?

I cannot suggest to you what to do but I know what your boss will do when it all breaks open.

[NizeGie]

I don't want to sound unduly alarmist, but: you are walking into a major legal problem here, for yourself and for your company.

Personally, I'd suggest that you consult with a lawyer who specializes in employment matters. Your own lawyer. This will cost money, but I suspect it will be worth it. You can talk to a company lawyer or HR person if you want, but you'll probably get fired in about 30 seconds.

[NizeGie]

The more I think about this, the more obvious it is that you need to talk to a lawyer now. The "worst that can happen" if you just let it go on is much worse than I think you realize. Losing your job is the least of it.

[Oohlala]

Originally Posted by HardNgood

I hope you guys don't work at a publishing company!!! LOL

I was thinking the same thing about th3 publishing co! Lol, yikes.

Seriously, sounds fun. I would take it for what it is worth, a fun fling that won't lead to anything permanent. Enjoy it while it lasts and don't get emotionally attached.

On the other hand, if your company has a policy against this sort of thing, you need to step back and get the job situation straightened out.

[NizeGie]

Broken record here:

This is not a good situation. "If your company has a policy against this sort of thing ..."? Come on! The Federal government has a policy against this kind of thing. Unless your company is run by utter incompetents, it does too.

What you describe in your post sounds very, very much like giving preferential treatment to a subordinate who "submitted to your sexual demands." That is quid pro quo sexual harassment, and it is illegal.

[Smuggler]

It is a lose lose situation.

As of right now, he has the right to do a lawsuit against your company should you do anything neg against him.
Sexual harassment is a big deal

Sleeping with a CO-WORKER is ok provided they are not your supervisor or you are their supervisor. I would advise against it if the company is small and you have to work directly with the co-worker. It makes things harder.
One of you will slip up and make a comment that shouldn't of been said at work...

[Newtolove]

hm difficult situation and whatever you decide to do keep work and love seperate ! after all it is only going to be a fling.

mind you I must say it is great for a company to throw a party for you and then crack down on there being emotional bonds between coworkers, I suggest that at work you be professional out of work it is you business