threesome relationship?

[thecocorobot]

My girlfriend and I have been dating for 2.5 years, we are graduating college and getting married in May. We were really good friends for a year or so before we started dating so we know every little secret about each other, and are still very open about everything we are thinking.

Now there is a girl in our school that we both like, and a few nights ago we were all hanging out at a bar ... got drunk and she ended up sleeping in our bed instead of walking home in the bitter cold. There was no sex and all of us had some amount of clothes on and my girlfriend and her were cuddled up on and off most of the night.

Its been a few days and we both have been repeatedly talking about having a threesome with her. Neither one of us is worried about screwing up our relationship, in fact if we all have fun my girlfriend is interested in trying to have her be part of our relationship ... at least for the next 4 months until we graduate and move. We all have fun hanging out and doing stuff together, and both my girlfriend and this other girl have had full time girlfriends in the past. I guess I am just wondering about how I deal with three people in a relationship ... I told her if we did something like this the only way I would be comfortable is if we all do stuff together or the two of them do stuff together.

Could this actually work?

[Brandye]

There are dozens of threads on threesomes around the Board. Read lots of them: both those who are looking forward to it and those who are emerging from the wreckage.

[thecocorobot]

I'm not really looking for advice on the threesome ... more on being in a relationship with my long term girlfriend (soon to be wife) and another girl.

Maybe I should just watch that show Big Love and see how the mormons do it.

[Beans518]

But that's still a threesome right? you'll still be all having sex togather. And the mormons that's thier lifestyle right? They are not just concidering it because it's interesting.It could work. Alot of people do it.I would think that it is emotionally draining. I was having sex with a gilfriend and her fiancee and I lived with them for 1 1/2yrs. What would that be called I'm wondering?

[EvilEvilKitten]

What you are considering is polyamory in the form of a triad. I suggest you Google polyamory and read up on it before you begin. No, I wouldn't consider doing 'it' like the Mormons do 'it' - terribly abusive relationships there.

[thecocorobot]

My girlfriend has a few friends that are poly ... but its a group of like 12 of them they all just randomly have sex with each other, not really a relationship. I will search around for polyamory triad and see what comes up.

Thanks again.

[Raidenator]

Originally Posted by thecocorobot

I'm not really looking for advice on the threesome ... more on being in a relationship with my long term girlfriend (soon to be wife) and another girl.

Maybe I should just watch that show Big Love and see how the mormons do it.

For the record, mormons don't practice polygamy. Big Love is a hollywoodized version of an almost entirely different religion, like the Christian Church of Science and Scientology, similar names, completely different religions.

On topic, if you guys have talked about it and your girlfriend really is up for it then perhaps it would be fine to do it. But like Brandye said you should read the "wreckage" stories first.

[EvilEvilKitten]

Officially Mormons no longer practice polygamy. That is "officially".

It takes maturity and non-possessive love to handle a polyamorous relationship. Interlocking intimate relationships take more "work" than normal ones. Just take it slowly and see where you end up.

Beans, that was a triad too. I myself have a quad.

[thecocorobot]

btw, I was just kidding about the whole mormon thing.

Going to see how this goes on Thursday. Thanks for all the advice, and in the meantime I will read through some of the other threesome posts to get some insight about what to look out for.