I just like to make her feel good...

[gacktfan99]

...It makes me feel good, y'know? Complimenting her and such, I really like this girl...but a lil' while ago I tried to ask myself why. Needless to say, I couldn't answer that question. I have a hard time being completely honest with myself and oftentimes i'm too harsh, i'm kinda biased if its me im trying to figure out.

So anyways, things have been going great, but that "why" period hit me pretty hard, sometimes now I feel really guilty that I could ever have had serious "why am I in this" thoughts, and when I go to compliment her in a text I worry about if I mean it, and when she isnt here I feel kinda...upset.

I don't wanna lose her, but the (untrue) recurring thought in my head is that the only reason I don't wanna lose her is simply because...I don't wanna imagine her upset...ever. It's not like I wanna break up...but the intensity of these thoughts sometimes gets too much...certain locations and scenarios I encounter daily end up leaving me upset and, for some reason, questioning my relationship? (For instance, in a college class I had to watch a video...there was an intimate scene between 2...somewhat slimy people...and I didn't really like it...but for some reason it made me feel bad about my relationship?) Sometimes i'm even worried that I don't wanna lose her because I enjoy...intimacy with her...even though I've never been that kind of person, its just...hard to conjure up strong positive emotions about...eating dinner with her lol, whereas more personal aspects of the relationship I can think of and enjoy easily.

I swear I must be the only person in the world ever to have had this problem...I don't wanna lose her...but I need a way to deal with these thoughts when she isnt here (when she is...I know I wanna be with her) I know its stupid, so please don't flame this post I think about her all the time...but I wanna go back to thinking of her occasionally in my day and just...smiling y'know? But its proving difficult... I can see where we're gonna end up if I don't sort myself out...already i'm beginning to sabotage the infatuation period of our relationship, I should be crazy about her regardless...not asking "but why" everytime I get just a lil' excited at, for instance, the oppotunity to see her in the weekend.

[dancingdoc2]

There is a saying that goes: "Yours is not to wonder why, only to accept what is."

You're thinking too much and worrying about stuff that doesn't need to be worried and analyzied about excessively. Another saying goes: "Don't try to fix what ain't broke." Trying to figure yourself out can be an exercise in futility. Usually we just accept what it is we are like and try to improve upon things that need working on.

[EvilEvilKitten]

"When you're in love, you're always insecure."

Stop thinking so much. Really. Just enjoy the feeling of knowing she's there, how she makes you feel, and the idea that she likes you. Sometimes you just have to relax and go with the flow.

[gacktfan99]

Thankyou very much, makes sense wise people, i'll give it a shot hehe