younger guy...yep its me again *rolleyes*

[Maya Minx]

hey there remember me? i had the troubles with the older guy....well that didnt work out when he went a long way away, we're still good friends, and we hope that maybe we can be together again some day and that everything will be happy and perfect like it once was.....

BUT in the meantime we have decided to sort of basically get on with our lives, and pretty much move on without moving on, ya get me?
So anyways, im with a guy now (i was with a girl before THANK YOU SO MUCH BRANDYE for all the advice you gave me before ) and he is......well.....to be perfectly honest kinda weird. He had a harsh childhood, and it has messed him up pretty good. We have slept together (carefully OF course!) and it was amazing, i still havent got myself to come yet, but i am slowly getting closer every time, so thats ok, i enjoy it now more than worry about climaxing, and i enjoy it even more...BUT ANYWAYS......hes younger than me, so i dont know how things will work, how do you know when a guy says something that he actually means it? i know at my age group (between 14 and 18) saying "i love you" is a pretty big thing. When he says it to me, his eyes are almost teary, does this mean he doesnt mean it, and is worried that he is leading me somewhere he doesnt wanna go? or does it mean that he does mean it and just doesnt know how to make me see it?... meh confusing. Also, he has to "finish himself off" most of the time, ive only made him come myself once, does this mean he doesnt trust me enough yet?

Anyways thats too many questions already, and i couldnt find any other posts like mine, apologies if there were some y'all. So erm yeah i await your replies and advice
Maya Minx
(who will hopefully stop asking all these annoying n00b questions, i hear you say :P)

[Newtolove]

I don't know what you mean by having a harsh childhood but if he lacks confidence it could mean he really does lovbe you and well how can I explain it you we men also get emotional at times...

[EvilEvilKitten]

Yes he means it. He's needy. Hopefully, you both will grow out of it. Keep some space between you; emotionally if not physically.

BTW not having orgasms is a big deal. I suggest you stop dating the inexperienced males in your age group.

[Maya Minx]

Harsh childhood.....by that i mean he was beaten by a member of the family untill he was put into care, and that has messed him up pretty bad...and he has admitted to me that he doesnt know how to show his feelings, especially as pretty much the only ones he feels any more are anger, fear and hate...meh hes just really confusing!!

thats the thing though, he is experienced, he has had more one night stands than i have had relationships! So maybe its me, but even masturbation gets me nowhere and ive been trying that for about 4 years now....so im pretty sure its just me. I dont mind it too much though, coz it feels good the whole time, and well i know he gets pleasure from it too, so neither of us mind that much, remember that i am only 16 as well, so maybe my body isnt ready to or something i dont know.....

[Newtolove]

well basically he needs time I quite understand how he may feel he is probsbly overwhelmed that he is feeling something other than anger fear or hate and he needs time to get used to it and understand how to show his feelings. if your willing just give it time and let him lets say reducate himself emotionally. i think it will be essential that you both trust oneanother completely and can tell one another anything. Being bady reated he may not have very god opinion of himself and so be finding it hard to beleive that someone can actually love him, yea in a way you are right he is a bit messed up emotionally but I am sure you can come through it.

by the way how old is he ?

he could of course seek help ? that might help both of you

[Maya Minx]

we do trust each other, certainly more than we trust anyone else (we both have "awkward" background) and last night we actually had a serious conversation, not something either of us are used to...we actually discussed the possibility of a future with each other...which was unusual but it brought us sooo much closer!
He will be 16 next July, so erm...yes...he isnt quite legal...so we're being really good untill a)he is legal b) we fully trust each other...although it is tempting to both of us, we wanna make sure that it is right..
He goes crazy when we "suggest" that he should seek councelling, he really hates it. hes been to 2 quacks already and they made him worse...but he is opening up to me now more than before, so that might help him...

[Newtolove]

do you mean it would illegal for you to have sex ? well thats a side issue and up to you.

You seem to be on the right treack and if you have had an "awkward" backgound as well then you can probavly understand him better than anyone else (i felt the same way about a girl we are both the oldest in a family break up) and ok if he doesn't want to go to a quak then fine it seems he is better with you anyway I am sure if you are willing and patient you will both get on just fine

[EvilEvilKitten]

He hasn't found the right therapist yet. If you can stand the strain of bringing him out of it, fine.

A series of one-night-stands is not the kind of experience required. Such short interludes do not teach a man how to 'listen' to a woman's body and understand what it is telling him.

It is up to you, of course, but I'd wait til he was 'legal'.

[Newtolove]

The problem with many therapists is they think only of doing their job rather than being considerate of their patients as well if he finds a good therapist it would be nice but he does seem to be making a lot of progress with you things can't happen overnight.

[Maya Minx]

he does seem to be making progress with me. And well im starting to believe him when he says things, and he has been smiling more..hes even started calling me baby...so things are getting better...but there is a friend interfering and saying things like i am just using him, and how im just messing him up more, rather than helping..but i just think thats out of jealousy, though they have kissed since we've been together (growls) she seems to think that i dont love him as much as i say i do, and how she loves him so much....unfortunately this girl has an......unladylike reputation shall we say? so he has trouble believing her...but once the seed is planted.........................................