What does he want? - guys tell me what this means!!

[skipgirl]

okay i started dating this guy in june whose two years older than me and A LOT more experienced...i told him i was a virgin and didn't think i was ready yet....then in august two weeks before i left for college, we had a talk and thought it would be better to be "just friends." and he wants me not to be "tied down." so for a week we didn't talk then we see each other at work and he starts callin me again. so then five days before i leave we're hanging out and we start hookin up and almost had sex but i stopped it since i was so confused. i told him i loved him though but he had said that he just wanted to be friends. so then i go away to school and three weeks into september he calls me and says he's comin to visit....so he comes and we have sex for the first time together, and it was my first time. we didn't really talk about our relationship though but when i asked him if he loved me he said "yes." i love him so much but idk what he wants. are we just "friends w/ benefits who love each other?" for all you guys out there what is this kid doin w/ my emotions?

[Morbid]

Well I can't really tell with just that info. It sounds like he wants you, and is keeping the idea alive, not letting it fade.

He could be confused and doesn't know what he wants, or he could just want sex.. It all depends on what happens and what you decide. If he comes back again, and just has sex, doesn't talk to you about it or something, then I would start to get curious. Sex is a great exercise, but don't get conned by someone playing it as a game

[Cleveland]

Though I cannot know what his motives are, my guess is that he is as confused as you. The success of relationships in general, and sexual relationships in particular, are based on communications and trust. Communications normally comes before trust. The two of you need to spend some time together JUST talking.

Perhaps you can visit in a very public place--a mall, train station, museum. Just hang, walk and talk. Sit in the park. Have lunch. Stay AWAY from bed. Talk about your relationship and insist that you both come clean re. what your expectations are.

AND remember, there is a HUGE difference "loving" someone and "being in love". Be very careful--you don't have to be in love with the first guy you have sex with--or even the 10th guy.

[skipgirl]

i just feel that like sex should mean that a relationship is progressing and growing....and i just feel that our relationship, whatever it may be, is just stagnate...now i am in college and a communications major and believe me i know all about communicating...i just can't figure this one out