A grade loser right here!!!!

[spritechick]

All the boy friends I have had over the past couple of years, have always dumped me coz they have feelings for someone else...

I just feel as if there is something so wrong with me, like I am not going to find anyone else, I know that must sound stupid and emo and all that jazz...

But when they say that they have feelings for someone else, and break up with me, or cheat on me then break up with me, I feel like a complete loser.

I have no self confidence left what so ever, I just don't feel like I can trust anyone...

Um so yeah I know I have been a bit vague, but I don't know what else to say.

[WallyLlama]

Ummm... sorry to tell you this, but to some extent - that's the way it works. Dating is a lot of "trial and error" and the error doesn't mean "I picked somebody horrible." It can mean, simply, "I picked somebody who hasn't turned out to be a good match for me." Unfortunately, a lot of times the grass looks greener over there... nothing really wrong with the grass here, but that might be better...

That's an over-simplification... but the point is that what you are experiencing is a bit "typical." The advice, "don't take it personal" is a bit unrealistic, but to some extent it's an answer.

You might try joining the game! You can do it in a historical sense by asking yourself if you really wish you were still with every guy you've dated. More often than not, I'll bet you'll find things worked out for the best... if for no other reason than it's not a lot of fun to be with somebody who doesn't want you.

You can't "make" somebody love you. I doubt that anyone will ever be able to explain why we fall in love with a particular person, but once we do it tends to really stick, often in spite of what we do or don't do. Obviously that's not to say that we should treat somebody like crap, but real love does cement a relationship and keep our partners around even when we screw up.

In short, you're not a loser... you are undiscovered.

[NizeGie]

WallyLlama is right.

Look at it this way (and putting to the side cultures where arranged marriages are the norm): how many people marry the first person they date? Or, to go a little further: how many people does someone typically date before they get married?

I've got to figure that well over 90% of all dating relationships end with some sort of a breakup. Really, it's the norm. There's obviously some heartache involved along the way, but in the end it more-or-less works out, and you acquire experience (at least) and interesting stories (perhaps) along the way.

[david616098]

With dating at one point or the other you will have to get your hearty broken but hey eventually you will meet the right person and when that happens you will be gratefull those guys left you .

what doesnt kill us makes us better people so be positive and hey you will find the right person who know he/she might be just right round the corner.