What to do??

[ForeverHERS]

Hey, guys. I joined this site back in April, 2004 as megalomaniac, but seem to have lost the password in the time I left. >.<

Anyways, I'm in sort of a predicament. I've found the love of my life. The problem is, she lives all the way across the country from me.

Yeah, I'm quite certain she is the love of my life. She's, well...nothing short of perfect to me. And, I know she feels the same way back to me. But now for my predicament. As I previously stated, she lives all the way across the country from me. I can't very well just hop on a plane and go visit her (I'm only 16...). The problem is, I really, really need to meet her. I basically have two options here.

A) I can try to talk to my parents and see what they say (I'm sure that will turn out well, knowing my parents *rolls eyes*
B) Suck it up for a year and a half and hook up with her when I move out there for college/university (it was actually where I was planning on going anyways. )

I know she is the love of my life. I can't live without her. I've waited all my life for this one perfect girl, and now that I have her, I don't want to let her go...

What do you guys suggest?

PS: Is thetease13 still around? I'd love to talk to her.

[thetease13]

I'm still around.

And um, I dunno what to really tell you. My first question is have you ever actually met her in person or do you just know her from online? I say this because the net can fool you. People can be one person on the net and another person in person. I know people that have married people they met on the net and have lived happy lives. And then I know other people who met some of their friends from online and what nothing to do with them anymore because they were completely different in person.

Now, I know you don't wanna hear this but you are only 16 and yes, I'm aware everyone goes at different paces and everyone feels things differently. But at 16 you are still discovering things and what you think may be love, may not always be love. I thought I was in love at 16 and I'm sure in one way or another I was. But now that I'm in what I'm in now, and been through what I've been through now, I know that it was just some 16 year old crush and while in some ways I do still have feelings for him, it's definately not what I thought it was at the time.

So, my suggestion is option B not just for waiting but for the simple fact that if you truly love her like you say you do, and she truly loves you back like you say she does, then waiting really shouldn't be a factor. It may be hard, but if you're meant to cross paths and be together, you will be.

[ForeverHERS]

Nice to hear from you, tease.

Yeah, sadly I only know her online. That's why I really want to go visit her this summer. I know most of you will probably think I'm too young to say this (and I'm not saying I'm not...), but I really truly believe she's the girl of my dreams.

Yeah, I'm willing to wait the 1.5 years for her, and I know she is for me. It's just the fact that I'm going to go completely crazy in that time... If I did go out there this summer, it would just be for a visit. I wouldn't STAY out there (despite how much I would want to).

I just don't know...

PS: Remember this thread?

Ugh...I've changed so much in these 2 years. =/

[The1stTriSexual]

Just wanted to let you know that I was in the exact same position you are now. We waited till we were both of age (about 16 months) before I took the flight to go meet her. Waiting all that time was really beneficial because it allowed us to build up a strong relationship to go from. We talked on the phone every day and night (with few exceptions) for over a year, we learned that we could trust each other from our experiences, and most important, that we are both committed to making this work. There are probably going to be people tugging on both of you, some girls going to want to be your gf and some guys gonna wanna be her bf. The beauty of a long distance relationship is, unless you both are 100% committed to making it work, it will end here (it ALMOST did for us). But the relationship will be that much more stronger if you can look deep inside and realize that although it would be reallly nice to have a gf to hold, its not with the person you want it to be, and despite all the uncertainty youre going to make it work with her. Its even nicer to know that she struggled with the same issue and came to the same conclusion. So I say go with B, use the time to build up a solid foundation to build from. But also if you dont see any harm in it, dont be afraid to tell your parents about her.

[Doodlebug]

Honestly, if you really love her, you can wait. But personally I'd be wary of online or long distance relationships as the former rarely works and the latter is very hard to maintain.

[WallyLlama]

Have to agree that a LDR is a great opportunity to build a very strong relationship... no, not easy... but if you focus on what you have (including a huge opportunity to communicate and learn about each other), it can be very positive experience, as TriSexual reports.

[ForeverHERS]

Yeah, I know. We're really building an awesome relationship. I am going to wait (although I really didn't have much of a choice anyways), and I agree. It will help us better our relationship indeed.

I really wan to thank you guys for your help.

*sigh*

Now to hop in my time machine and set it ahead 1.5 years.

And Doodlebug, I know what you mean, but we both truly love each other. I'm quite assured this is going to work (and even if it doesn't, I'm not really losing anything...).

Thanks to you all.