FRUSTRATION

[MIKE28]

Heres my situation:

Me and my girlfriend have been goin out for 3 months now (the longest relationship either of us have had). before that we were friends for a couple years, so we know each other prety well. Whenever we're alone she always slides away from me on the couch and cant even put my arm around her because its "uncomfortable". I was fine with that n respected it cause i thought she was someone who needed to get to know someone more to feel comfortabel with em.

Then bout a week ago we were talkin with friends bout our past experiences and how far we've gone. I found out shes done basically everything except actual sex. it doesnt bother me that she done stuff w/other guys, just taht with me (her longest relationship yet) she cant get close n wont even make out or anything...(believe me ive tried)

Most of my friends think i should just end it, but i like her and dont know for sure. All i want is a little emotion from her, but that even seems to be hard to get. Im so damn confused and frustrated any reply would be helpful.

[WallyLlama]

Don't discount the possibility that she might have stretched the truth a bit in talking with friends - particularly if everyone else was listing experience.

The lack of "emotion" and physical contact with is a different matter and, to a large extent, one you and she need to discuss regardless of what she's done/not done in the past.

I wouldn't suggest you use a "you say you've done, but you won't" approach... but I would urge some converation with her about the physical aspect of your relationship.

[Rosie]

hi,
i am in the exact same situation, except i would b the girlfriend in your story, so i might be able to shed some light onto her mindset. i have known the guy i am beginning to see now for just over a year, and we are really good mates, and we have only just started to see eachother (i know it isnt 3 months but bare with me).
he is a very affectionate guy, n i am just "not comfortable" with him touching me, n i dont really know why, i have thought about it alot, and there are personal reasons to do with my own experiences, so perhaps you don't know the full story of what has happened in the past thus that may be why she may be unsure with you. I dont think what she has done in the past matters because she is with YOU now and every relationship is different. Another reason i have found is because i have been friends with this guy for so long, n even though i like him find it weird to be physical with him when we have had such a non physical beginning. It may just be the transition from treating you as a friend to her boyfriend that may be causing her to be uncomfortable. but again this is my situation.
or just the fact she is scared, it is scary being with someone new especially when you have had such a history before being together and really really respect and do care ALOT about their thoughts and opinions and that the friendship is something you dont want to screw up!

but again communication is the key here!! and u do need to talk with her!
hope i can sorta help, but please talk to her it makes the world of difference
xxx

[MIKE28]

Thanks for the replies. As much as i dont like it, i can see what u mean Rosie about being friends first and the transition from "just friends" to being closer. I'll talk to her about it and try to know why shes uncomfortable getting close to me sometimes.
I'm not as confused/frustrated now since i know im not the only one goin through it though. Thanks again for the input.

[EndlessProblems]

A) Maybe she actually likes you, and compared to the others guys she's dated (who were possibly just physical relationships) she likes you A LOT. You never know, just give it time...

B) Try something a bit more on the romantic side, maybe that will make her want to do it