This stuff has gone on too long

[SMPL17]

Alright, ask me for clarification if needed. I am writting this while I am not to awake, if it sounds odd... well it probably will. Alright me and my g/f celebrated our 1 year a week ago. This week has been a grand week for us. Except for today, which she completly blew up on me and suddenly considered splitting up. This is not the first time she has done this, but this might just be the last. We were doin some physical stuff, a bit more than we usually do. She acted like she wanted sex so bad, but I really did not want to. I have never... well sticked my penis in a girls... well you know I thought it might be cool to just do that, but pull it out and be like no no to sex because I really do not feel comfortable doing it. She has never had it before, her whole is so small that it would of been hard to get it in there. After a few min and some more kissing, she was all like talking to me and asking me do I really want to do it tonight, like I wanted to do it in the first place. I came to the final conclusion no, before anything of sexual intercourse even began ( i never even stuck it in her). She got all wack like I was going to do it and that she knew it and how could I, and started playing this whole thing of that I walk all over her and that I wanted to have sex but she didn't and that I didn't know what she wanted sexualy, and perceded to try to just completly ruin an extremly good day for me. I calmed her down, talked things over, but she kept making it out like I was a frikin moron about where the limits are to when something is sex, and that I know she doesnt want to have sex before marriage. Yet, earlier she was talkin about how she wanted it so bad from me. So it's wtf first no, then yes all the way, then I am a bad b.f for somehow wanting to do it so badly but then again I clearly explained to her when we were talking my true intention was not to have sex at all. Wow, so we get in the car, things are fine, she blew her steam, she acted like everything was normal. I finnaly really said my own two cents, and things blew up. She got all defensive and like I am going to tell all my friends about what happened that night, and how they are going to hate her. Yet she doesn't hang with my friends and I that dam often so I do not know what her deal with that is. She tried to make me feel like shit. As of late she has been talking about these two guys in her college classes, and just how dam great of people they seem to be. Now I know girls can be friends with guys, hell I could care less if my g/f has a few guy friends. But it seems everytime she talks about how awsome these few guys in one of her classes, shit soon enough seems to get really screwed up, and the whole problem is tossed back on me completly like I am the bad guy. It's like wtf. It's some screwed up shit, I think it would be best just to split and be friends and whatever. I have too much other stress in my life and I just cant keep dealin with her blowin up on me like this.

[lilly2279]

The first time for men or women can be emotional. She's probably freaking because it IS a big deal to her. She needs to be reassured that you are in it for the long haul and not just using her.

She may be afraid she'll give it up to you and you'll not like it and find someone else. Who knows.

And when you're messing around you get horny, both men and women do, so you may get caught up in the heat of the moment and want to have sex because your hormones are going crazy. That's just how it is sometimes.