03-11-2005, 08:42 AM
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Seriously now, if you don't want to be committed then why did you ask how he felt in the first place? Why do you keep bugging him about it if you don't want to be more committed.
It makes no sense to me.
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Just because it's not right for you doesn't mean it's not right for somebody else. Do it like it's the first time, but make it last as if it's the last. True love cannot be found where it does not truly exist, but it cannot be hidden where it truly does. 
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03-11-2005, 11:27 PM
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I really don't want a commitment from him right now, like I said I am having fun. I just wanted to know where he was at.... We had talked before it ever got physical and I wanted to see if we were still on the same wavelength. I don't ever want to assume something and then find out later that it was wrong. I know thats he's interested, and for now thats enough. Later we will see what happens. I dont even know if I should call him now and explain this... Or wait and see what he does. I am leaning towards waiting...
any advice would still be appreciated.
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03-12-2005, 12:26 AM
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Hmmm... I don't know how I'd feel about him signing off without even a "See ya." *But anyway...
It sounds like you are okay with the way things are and it sounds like he might be worried that you are too interested in settling down. *It you want to continue this and keep it casual, I'd back off for a little while (say a week or so). *Maybe even let him make the first move... I don't really know. *It's hard to make a judgment call without really knowing the people involved. *Of course, you know him better than we do and any decision is ultimately your's...
__________________
The only thing to do with good advice is pass it on. It is never any use to oneself. -Oscar Wilde
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03-14-2005, 08:44 PM
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An update:::
We are talking.... trying to figure where this is heading, where we both want it to go, or do. Any other comments would be great. You guys are the best and have really been helping us both out.
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03-15-2005, 03:41 AM
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Carpe Diem! Sieze the day! Smell the roses! Enjoy the moment!
There are probably a thousand other ways to say: sometimes you just gotta enjoy it. No plan, no goal, no definition, no commitment... I wouldn't worry too much about where you're heading as long as you're both comfortable with where you are. Using the original example: talking on the telephone more doesn't necessarily mean a deeper commitment... it could just mean you want to hear each other's voice. Simplify. Relationships can be exciting adventures... as long as you are traveling together. It's not unusual for one person to get ahead from time to time... and it's okay to encourage the other to "catch up" or "slow down." That way you discover what's around the corner together. My bet is that a lot of potential relationships are spoiled by trying to label them too early... with too many absolutes... not enough open-mindedness and love of the journey. In other words... don't worry too much about where you want it to go... just keep traveling and see where you end up. At the same, keep checking with each other to make sure the trip is working for both of you. You'll be fine.
__________________
"The most fundamental form of human stupidity is forgetting what we were trying to do in the first place."
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