ex girlfriend

[cloud087]

alright well heres the senario....

was with my ex girlfriend for about a little more than a year. we were perfect for eachother.....at the time at least. as time passed she seemed slowly detached from me. untill the day where she ended it. we were actually really good friends after we broke up, we hung out, went to parties and even occasionally hooked up(probably not the best idea). but then she just started acting like she wanted nothing to do with me. and i didnt like this at all cause i did and still do have very strong feelings for her. so i just cut her outa my life. the part that took me by surprise is that she got pissed off about me ignoring her and was pretty much begging me to talk to her. anyways 3 months down the line here we are, and all of a sudden shes on my mind 24 hours a day. i dream about her, i think about her, and even when i think im not thinking aobut her, i am(sorry if that confuses you ). the thing i want most is to talk to her but i dont know if i its the best idea cause when we were just friends, she caused me alot of stress cause one day she would act like she wanted to get back together and she told me that it may happen one day....then others she wouldnt even look at me. and she just played head games with me and it made me so stressed that it was actually making me physically ill. what my question to you all is.....do you think its worth it to talk to her again for the SLIGHT chance of getting back together? or should i continue ignoring her and these constant thoughts of her?


my apologies in advance if this may not make sense, just try your best to make it out

[LittleFury]

You need to take a break, a complete break from each other. For some people, 3 months is not eough time to get over a long term relationship like yours. If you want to stay frined...great, email ehr once a month and see how she is, otherwise just give it time for things to settle and for any confussion to go away.

[iamawesum69420]

You're never going to be able to get completely over her if you keep talking to her and seeing her. You need to just cut off contact with her completely for awhile until you know for sure you're over her. Maybe after you start seeing other people. And if you two are really meant to be together this time apart isn't going to hurt you.

[The1stTriSexual]

I think you should tell her how you feel. Just be completely honest with her and let her know that something needs to change. If she says she doesn’t want to be with you right now, then ask her to please give you time so you can get over her. That should send her a strong message.

[mjv154]

I agree with the others.... you need some time apart. Having faced a similar situation I can tell you that you want to remove her from your life.

The best way to handel things is to still be kind and respectful to her. Tell her that you need time to sort things out and that you can't deal with seeing or talking to her right now.

Set limits. If you run into her, say hello, and then just leave it at that. You are being polite and yet still able to work on dealing with this situation.

[vagabondprince]

coming from the same place you're in, i would recommend that you get over her completely (as completely as possible, like others have said, it's impossible to completely get over her) before you start talking to her again. even if there could be a chance that you two get back together, have the mindset that there won't be, go at it as if you're just trying to preserve what was a good friendship on top of the relationship. start dating other girls; it will help you get over her more quickly.

Note, this is purely my personal opinion. there could be other ways to go about it i don't know of. I just know that doing what i mentioned above has helped me get out of a vicious cycle of breaking up and getting back together with my ex. we're currently still in the process of getting over each other, but now that i'm actively trying to date again, it's much easier to interact with her.

[mmparks]

I agree to an extent... you need to pull back and go on with things.. she obviously has. Its not uncommon for a woman to need that ego thing ( and guys too for that matter) that they get when they string someone along. Its a power trip. I'd cut off her source of power over you if I were you. Maybe later you two can be friends... who knows.
What youre doing is just plain unhealthy.

[tylerdurden]

im semi in the same boat. me and a girl were serious for a year and seven months. came close to sex even. i left her for personal reasons (she never trusted me, granted i cheated on her but even before then she didnt... idk and i wanted to kinda see others) but weve been apart for a little over a year and i still miss the hell out of her. i havnt really talked to her since. ive maybe sent 2 emails but i still will sit and wonder would she take me back, should i go back. cuz i was happy. i just didnt like her not trusting me. wut im also confused on is... do i miss her... or the affection i got.

[Metalixia]

I think it's important that we don't always get what we want. I got back with my ex the other week, the one I'd been dreaming of for weeks, and I'm still trying to decide if it's really what I wanted.