First love problem?

[jsr2701]

well, heres the thing... ummmm, i was with my ex for about 2 years and i really liked her. i mean, i was head over heels for her, madly in love, yadda yadaa.... but well, she didnt really feel the same way for me. well, i slowly lost my affection for her because i wasnt being cared for equally know what i mean? however, it changed... she began to "love" me too but by then it was pretty much over.

well, i began going out with my friend with who i am with today. and now we have been together almost a year but lately ive been finding myself to be missing my ex. i mean, alot. i dream about her, i think about her more and more. and i just cant stop thinking about her. when i see her around, i get all tied up inside like i used to.

but the problem is... my gf now really really feels the way i felt for my ex before. and i must admit, things are much easier with my gf now. like, i know she cares and will always care about me. not to mention that everyone loves my gf now. even my family!

what do these feelings mean? what should i do? i am really confused! please help.

[Rawbob]

Hmmmmm...funny how this works:

- you like a girl, she likes you
- you start falling in love with her..she still just "likes you"
- you want a FULL relationship, she dosn't, you break up.
- you move one, start dating, find a new GF you like
- the new GF likes you too
- old GF sees you with another girl, starts talking to you
- old GF begins to see she may have acted to hastily, makes overtures to rekindle your relationship
- you begin to dis-invest with your new GF, based on what your old GF is saying/doing
- new GF falls in love with you, you've disinvested just enough to KNOW you don't have the same feelings for her

WHAT TO DO? Well, if you lean nothing else, you have learned that in many ways, LOVE IS A DECISION. The amount of yourself you invest in any relationship is crucial to its short- and long-term success. So, if i were you, i'd be honest with myself and INVEST in one, OR, let each know where you are. This does NOT mean you break up with your current GF, because you could end up in the same situation in a year.

So, the key thing is to communicate equally. Unless you're fibbing about your feelings, remember, your old GF really hurt you, and you need to let her know that. ANd you MUST keep your currrent GF's feelings in mind as well.

There is no "quick fix".....you have to try and be fair...but it's tough when it's feelings. Again, unless you really KNOW you still are in love with your OLD GF, then you owe it to your current GF to at least find out how deep your feelings with her are real.

Just please be honest with yourself and them.

[girl12]

i agree with rawbob!

maybe she realized that she DID have feelings for u, after you broke up! but ya i agree with rawbob and u need to let her kno that she hurt u.

but in the end make the decision thats best for u!

xo-mariah

[yetagainsorrows]

I wouldn't get back with your ex, history will repeat it's self. When she gets comfortable again she will walk all over you and not care. You need to be with someone who will love, respect and care for you as you deserve. It's up to you. I say leave the past as it is, the past....there are others and you can do better.

[jsr2701]

thanks alot guys, i really appreciate the input. and i think u guys are right. things may just repeat themselves.