the brush off?

[thetease13]

Ok, so I have no idea where to really stick this, but it's going here.

My current relationship is kinda on the rocks. *Not that I'm sure why, but that's not what this is about.

This is about the fact that someone who has had a crush on me a long time, well, he kissed me today. *Yes, I let him.
I figured if I'm currently on the rocks in whatever I'm in, I might as well try. *I can't say the thought never crossed my mind.

So we kissed, and I didn't feel anything. *At all.
There was no spark, there was no, anything. *When I first kissed the person I'm "with" now, even it was just a peck, I felt something and you could tell he felt it back. *When we kissed for real, I really felt something and I know he did, cause he's the one that intiated it and pulled me closer.

But, with this guy, I didn't feel anything.
We were playing around on TXT msg later on (which is something we always do) and on my way home, he TXTed me asking if I liked the kiss, because he did.
And while, not trying to be mean and just try to get him to take the hint (because obviously, ignoring him afterwards didn't work too well), I said that honestly, I had had better. *Because I have. *I've actually only kissed one other guy in my life, the one I'm "with" now, and compared to him, he, well, sucked. *The one I'm "with" now, he's great. *Really really great.

So anyways, he just called me a little bit ago and I let my voicemail pick up because I didn't want to talk to him and he said that I was being cold and that he'd call me later.

So I sent him another message saying that I was sorry, but I just didn't feel anything.
(Which is the truth.)

Am I really, doing the right thing?
I mean, I'm not interested. *All the other people I've ever told that to, well, one was a psychopath, one didn't quit, one followed me around at school, and one wound up stalking me. *And good god, I don't need this one to turn out that way too.
Help me?

[oberon]

Hmmm... I don't really think you can do anything but be honest. If it wasn't there, it wasn't there.

Does he know that you are currently "sort of" involved with someone? Maybe you could use that as an excuse.... even if it is "on the rocks". As in, "I'm seeing someone now and even though it's not going well, I'm not ready to date anyone else."

Then we'll all just pray that this one's not a psycho. lol.

[thetease13]

Well no, he doesn't know about the "sorta of" one. Cause um, well, this one works with me too, only, he works with me less often than the other one.

And you know, to make matters worth with this one, he is also married.

I swear to god I am not out to get married people. I was even telling him in front of everyone when we were joking around that I'm not sure your wife would approve, (cause honestly, I was trying to brush him off then), and he just kinda shrugged and said something like she wouldn't care.

On a good note, he has finally stopped txting/emailing me and he never called back like he said he was going to after my last email to him, so I guess that's a start.
Here's hoping he doesn't have to work next week. Not sure I want to face him. lol.

[demonbuttercup]

How do you keep attracting these married men Tease? lol
Crazy stuff!!

[thetease13]

It's a gift apparently.
A gift I've had since high school. lol. (For the record, no, I never did anything with any of my teachers...even in college)
And I swear to god I don't set out to get them. I'm just myself. They're the ones that come after me. lol.

I have my theories on why they might like me, but we won't go there...yet.

But ya know, in a really sad and disturbing way, it seems to be the lesser of two evils, even if I don't do anything with them.
All the single people that came after me were creepy stalkery psychos. All the married ones have atleast been normal.
I'd think I'd rather have the latter, cause really, I'm probably gonna wind up being friends with them rather than doing something with them, and I'd rather have a friend that stuck around than someone who was my friend that turned into a psycho. lol.

[Yes, I'm babbling. Thanks for noticing.]

I think I'm just doomed in the relationship area.
One day I'll probably wind up being an unintentional homewrecker. That's gonna be fun. No, really.

[vagabondprince]

one thing i've gotta say since i don't believe in cheating...the married one's aren't too normal either. at least they're not the creepy type of not normal though.

About the kiss, if you already didn't have feelings for the guy that kissed you, you probably weren't going to feel anything in the kiss. and that's fine. the emotion really should be there before the kiss. but if you do have feelings from soneone and have a bad first kiss, you have to realize that different people have different kissing styles. it takes a couple of kisses to syncronize with your partner sometimes, and if there's already emotion there, some time should be taken to work on the kissing.

[thetease13]

I didn't feel anything before and I sure don't feel anything afterwards and I really didn't feel anything during it.

Like I said, when I kissed the one I'm "with" now, I felt something during it. I felt something during the first peck and I felt something during the first french kiss.

But this dude? Nothing.
And despite what he wants to ask me about how I could decide if I felt anything or not in the location we were in, I just didn't feel anything. And believe me, I've kissed someone there before and felt something. lol.

And he really does suck.
I'm no expert kisser here, but yea, that sucked.

[monie]

The location? That's kind of... interesting...
ANYWAYS... it is kinda interesting that you keep attracting married men. I seem to attract the inexperienced guys... Oh well. At least they're sweethearts!
Now as far as this guy you kissed, I would just forget about it. Seems like he has stopped bothering you anyways. So just move on.
Hope that helps a little...

[thetease13]

lol.
the location was work. lol.
And you know, since the one I'm "seeing" is from work too, I would know that the location wouldn't have bothered me. lol.

And yea, I've moved on but ya know, gonna be kinda awkward (is that spelled right? hmmm...) when I see him the next time he has to work there.
Or maybe it'll be fine and I just over think and worry too much. lol.

[monie]

Well naturally, it will be kinda akward (and yes, you spelled that right ) But if you just act like its nothing, then it will be fine and will lessen the akwardness. ( I wonder if that was a word lol) Anyways, all should be fine if you just dont think about it much.