making conversation

[orangeosprey]

Hey all.

I just started going out with a girl i been crazy about for a long while. cutting to the chase im finding it really difficult to make any sort of conversation with her when were alone. It a typical teenage "awkward silence" sorta moment.Its fine wen other ppl are around, but wen were alone i just go brain dead. we had liked each other mutually for a long time but talking to her before we went out was never a problem. Im natrually quite an extrovert person, but now i just seem to be quieter and quieter around her. is this just a bad habit ill get out of as i get used to being with her?

plz help, ta.

[oberon]

"Awkward Silences", everyone has them. *Try asking her questions. *Don't come across like the DA on "Law and Order", but just stuff where she can do the talking. *"What do you think about *****? *"Who's your favorite *****?" *Heck, even, "What'd you do (last night, today, in school)?" *The more you find out about each other the more you should have to talk about.

Incidentally, this only really works if you pay attention to what she is saying and can make comments or ask follow-up questions of your own.

[soulmates82]

so a gal friend of yours has become a very close and special friend - she is still a friend and now you are being intimate with a friend. should'nt that now also bring you two a lot closer in the friendship part just as you are closer in the physical sense. gotta be curious about lots of interesting stuff you dont know about her and lots to tell her about yourself. dont dig for dirt or pry for all er dirty detials - general stuff like has she ever been to disney world or tell her about you went to WY when you were 7 and how you will never forget how blue the sky was. can she believe how bad the pot holes are on that road in front of the mall! .... if you have to force conversation cuz you dont have anything in commor or you are not interested to learn more abour her or she is not interested in learning about you, best forget any long term plans you have for this relationship and look instead for a more compatable friend withwhom you will feel more comfortable in being closer to

[WallyLlama]

And remember that every minute does not have to be filled with noise and conversation. A good relationship includes the ability to simply be together.

And good communication includes more than words. You can communicate with her by the way you look at her... by the way you touch her... take her hand...

I have known people who were real chatterboxes most of the time who were strangely silent when we were alone. I considered it a compliment... it means they are relaxed and don't feel that they have to keep talking to keep my attention. Is it obvious that I don't think "being quiet" around her is a bad habit?

If she's content, that's good enough.