Flirting gone bad.......or good?

[Norinco]

OK. we've pretty much established that i need to actually attempt to meet people rather then not try at all and still complain that i can't. this is what i'd like to cover in today's thread topic.
flirting and initial chit chat.
i'm not good at picking up on "signals" or "hints" from women.. (lack of experience a factor...but i don't have time to learn at the normal pace, i'm already 23, so i need the accelerated lesson plan.)
so say i'm chatting up a some girl at K-mart, a cashier, another customer whoever. what signals should i be looking for to let me know that she's also interested or is at least enjoying the conversation? any specific types of blinks or giggles or body language here? any subconscious stuff going on? (i know you women don't like to reveal your tricks, but read through all of my posts and maybe then you'll make an exception when you see how pathetic my love life is.)
on my end, what are some good topics, or lines, or things i should say that should clue her in and make her think "oh gee, this guy is flirting with me!"
most people develop thier own tactics, and maybe someday i will too, but for right now i need some tips.
as important as knowing when she IS interested, is knowing when she most certainly is NOT.
how can i tell she's getting annoyed with the strange guy who keeps talking to her for some reason? any visual clues here. what do you girls on this site do to get someone to leave you alone (besides mace, a knee to the crotch or a .38, i'd say those three are pretty obvious). basically i want to be able to identify the point in the conversation when it's time for me to bail and at least save face. i don't want to be one of "those guys", you know the type i'm talking about
also another topic i need clarified...wedding and engagement rings. ALWAYS ON LEFT RING FINGER...right? is it safe to assume that ANY ring on that finger is one of the above? or are other "decorative" rings also worn there? seems like un-attached women might want to keep that finger clear of rings to avoid confusing potential suitors.....such as "dating simpletons" like myself.

i think i'm really going to try to be a bit more proactive here. but i just want to have a clear understanding of the rules before i start the game.

[Brauul]

I think personally that "signs" are really subjective. I was and to some degree am just like you. I went 26 years without ever kissing anyone that I was interested in. Was always shy and was always just kind of in the background. I have heard it all in terms of what to look for but you may simply have to use a common sense approach. I was at a restaurant and a pretty nice looking waitress came up and took my order. Well she started talking about how she was going away for a month or something on military duty or training or something and I never gave it a second thought. Then it hit me. Why would she give me such personal information? Was it a sign? probably not, but it was still something she wanted to tell ME about. That is how it starts. Innocent conversation. You probably won't get full-on flirting unless someone REALLY want's you bad. You are probably going to have to sit through boring conversations or just the opposite. If a woman doesn't up and cut off the conversation, then she is interested at least in talking to you. Don't expect a date right away, and don't expect to be shot down either. You have to realize that not all women are looking for a relationship. Some want friendship first. And if they are your friend, then there is a chance you are a backup. Now this means that you get put on a list of people that she can come to and talk to and hang with. You never know when this can develop into something more. It may never, but it is always good to have really good female friends to talk to. If you are really chummy with them, they may even let you in on womens most confidential of information. such as: "why do women go to the bathroom in groups". Ahem, anyway..Just simply talking like a friend can open yourself up in general and get you comfortable in general with women and with being at least a little social. You can also go the less social route (which I did) and that is online dating. It helps break the ice and see compatibilities easier. I dunno, just an option to look into. Just know that women can be in the same boat. Feeling unatractive (and they could be a 10 in someones book) and not sure what to do. Just realize that confidence is a 2 way street here. Just suck it up and try. The worst that can happen is your converstation is cut off abruptly and that's that. You may also try looking for a feature on this person and simply complimenting them on it..or complimenting on someone else that has that same feature (while innocently not realizing she may have the same thing). Actually starting the conversation can be hard, but realize that you may have had someone interested in you and not even know it. I sure did, but it took me way too long to figure it out hehe. Just have fun and get ready to have both rejection and acceptance. And sorry if this jumps from topic to topic. my brain type (scattered) makes me jump from one thing to another.

[Tessie]

Norinco I happen to find your post so endearing. If I was 15 years younger and single I would definately want to talk to you. I like your humor that I see in your post. But you do have to work on not putting yourself down. Girls will only tolorate that for so long.

Brauul had some good advice for you and I would listen to it.

I have more ideas but its late and I have to get up very early in the morning. I will come back tomorrow with some pointers for you that just might help.

Just never give up and 23 is not ancient you know. *

[Muppet74]

I wear rings on either finger (they look nothing like engagement or wedding) it's just that it fits...and not on other fingers...if i see a plain gold band on a finger of reputation (3rd fingers of either hand)...i would gather married. If i saw a glittery, diamond...yeah...might think that too...DO NOT JUDGE RINGS ON HANDS....or just ask straight out...
Never assume