should i call/ email her?

[p0pychulo8]

I posted this a little while ago and got some good responses but they did not really answer my question. Okay so I am going to be a sophmore in college and i am on summer break now. At the beginning of my freshman year I met a girl. she had a bf that she had been going out with for about 2 years. she ended up breaking up with him a couple of weeks later due to continuous problems they were having. We got together and it was awesome. We talked about everything and she was great. we were never really going out though. A couple of weeks into it her old bf called her and they ended up getting back together. she said that she had to give it another chance bc of all the history that her and him had. so whatever. then things got a little awkward between us and we didnt really talk for a while. 2nd semester came around and we had a class together. we started talking again just as friends. she had broken up with her bf again at this point but i did not know this yet. end of the year comes around and she tells me that we should hang out one day. we did and we had a great time. we kissed and did some other stuff...nothing too serious. she left at like 4:30 in the morning to go back to her room. then for the next few days she did not really talk to me. it came time to leave school to go home and she still didnt say anything. i tried a few times to talk to her but she never came to the room like she said she would. i ended up talking to her on the computer and she said that she was avoiding me bc she felt bad and embarrased bc we were not going to date. i asked her if we werent going to date bc she did not want to or it it was for other reasons. she went on to say that she thought that i was a cool guy but that she was going to be very busy with a job, student govt, friends, etc and did not know if she would have time to have a bf next year. i told her that we could take it slow and just talk on the phone and stuff to get to know more about eachother (she lives about 2 1/2 hours north of me). she said that it sounded good. here are my thoughts. neither of us is really looking for a serious relationship right now where you constantly have to been attached to the others side. i am sort of picky when it comes to girls tho and i wouldnt want to let this opportunity slip by. like i said b4...we have a lot in common...stuff that other people just dont...and while i dont want a serious relationship at this moment...i can see us dating for a while. she is a very conservative girl. i think that she is a little afraid of going out with another guy that is not her old bf. he is the only guy she has ever seriously dated. i think that bc she does not know what to fully expect from me, a new guy, she doesnt want to take the chance. i think that she was embarrased about that night bc she has never done anything with another guy b4. we have tons of common interests and we have awesome conversations when we do talk. i know that she likes me to a certain point but I do not know where that point is. i am almost fully convinced that she is just totally afraid to start a relationship with a new guy. we have not talked since we talked on the computer. it has been about two weeks now. should i call her or e-mail her just saying whats up and how r u etc? what should i do? should i just forget about her until school starts up again?

[WallyLlama]

I'd lean towards emailing her rather than calling.

I think she has set fairly clear parameters at this point. All you have to do is respect and honor them and see where it goes.

If you expect too much or push to hard, the odds are good that you'll be history. Her priorities are somewhat logical and it doesn't necessarily have anything to do with her fears or being conservative or being embarrassed.

Seems to me that it's just that simple. Stay in touch with her, don't make a lot of demands for her time, etc.

From what you've written it sounds like that's going to difficult for you. If she's worth the effort, you have to make it.

[Greendale]

I disagree with the poster above, e-mailing is not a good thing to do first thing. I would call her. It'll show her you have confidence.

[CoLdWoLf]

I agree with wally, although, take my word for it, girls with lots of baggage sometimes can jepaordize your feelings and they can hurt you in the process even if something does evolve, trust me, unless she losses complete touch of this dude she isn't worth your time, although if you want to stick by her just make sure you don't turn more into a friend but keep in touch with her meet up occasionally and see what happens :-p but always look at the bigger picture

[WallyLlama]

Thanks for the vote of confidence, Wolf. :-) I went with the conservative (email) approach because it seems to me that honors the parameters she set.

Nice to see you around again, Wolf, and not only because you agree with me. LOL

Wally

[CoLdWoLf]

haha thanks, ill have to add an update to my post soon boy oh boy