New Relationship Got Serious Very Fast

[AMYSBOY]

Me and my gilfriend have been going out for about 6 months and we started having sex relatively early in our relationship. Tonite she told me she thinksshe is pregnant and now I have no idea what to do it came totally out of no where and honestly I am terrified and have no idea wht to do I'm 17 years old and a junior in high school and I have absolutely no idea what to do so any advice anyone could give me would be more than apreciated. The advice I have to everyone out there is that sex is just sex and it is totally not worth what I'm going through right now, because thisi s unbearable I cant even sleep for more than a couple of hours before waking up worried about her being pregnant. What worse than anything else is tha every time we had sex we did everything perfect, we used a condom put it on right everything and I just cant believe this is happening.

[Handcuffed]

Well, I am 18. I am sorry that you are having to go through this, I know how you feel, I am empathize, truly. There are some things you need to figure out... did the condom break? Are you and her willing to have an abortion? Did she use the morning after pill if there was a slip up? I can help you, if you want me to. I know what it is like to have some terrifying times at a young age involving sex. How can I help?

[WallyLlama]

What to do?

Accept 50% of the responsibility for this and 50% of the responsiblity for "fixing" it.

A good start would be to confirm whether or not she IS, in fact, pregnant. It would not be the first time a girl thought she was pregnant but wasn't. A condom is not foolproof, certainly, but if you did everything perfect... well, the odds are in favor of this being a false pregnancy.

Part two of that is "don't panic." If she's actually pregnant, there's going to be a lot to do and a lot to decide. But before you go too far, you need to gather information, including the resources available to you both: both your parents, school counselors, planned parenthood organizations...

I don't exactly agree that it's particularly important to figure out what happened. I think you have to get some facts and information and figure out what things you're going to do next.

And that includes if it turns out she's not pregnant. You should have learned something, eh?

Wally

[oberon]

First things first. *You think she is pregnant. *Find out. *A home pregnancy test, or visit a clinic or doctor. *Worrying is worse than knowing. *And this isn't a problem that just goes away.

Second, IF it turns out she is, start evaluating your options. *How soon has it been? *The morning after pill is only good like, I think, 72 hours after- not sure on the exact time but it is fairly short. *You also don't need to handle this alone. *IF she is pregnant, then it's time to bring in the parents. *You might also consider counselors. *Think about your choices. *Is abortion an answer? *Adoption? *The sooner you start planning the better off you'll be.

Most important is to take responsibility for this and act. *Both of you. *As I said before, this problem won't just go away if you ignore it. *

Now if it turns out that you get lucky. *A few facts you should know: Condoms are not 100% effective- there is a 2-3% chance of pregnancy or an STD even using a condom. *Birth control is not always 100% effective- and does nothing against STDs.

If you plan on having sex again, she should be on birth control. *You should still use a condom, and to be extra safe a spermicidal foam or gel- those with nonoxynol-9 have even been effective in preventing HIV.

Good Luck.

[Rawbob]

I agree with almost all the posts here....but i'll add one more BIG thing..and that is TAKE CONTROL OF THE SITUATION!

It sucks that you got such a reality check, and now have to really "grow up" (i know that sounds shitty, but, if she is pregnant and has the baby, you just lost your youth)...but the first and BEST way to begin coping is to TAKE CONTROL.

Stop losing sleep. Buy the pregnancy test, have her take it with YOU THERE! Make sure u get the test that has 2 tests to make double sure. FOLLOW THE DIRECTIONS TO THE LETTER.

IF they come out positive, then you need to be prepared with 2 options:
1) Talk to both your folks about options, or
2) Get to a free clinic for a final verification of her pregnancy.

Then you have other big decisons to make..but TAKE CONTROL...get info! That is your power!

Good luck!

[AMYSBOY]

Well heres whats going on. We have prom saturday night and she doesnt want to take the test before it b/c if she finds out for sure it will ruin it for her and WE are going to got find out for sure on Sunday. The thing that scares me the most about the whole situation is if she is then its kind of unavoidable to tell he parents like a few people said to do,but the thing is that when her parents find out im not gonna be able to even talk to her, and I really like this girl a lot so I cant even think about that happening. Its really nice to get all this off my shoulders b/c I cant talk to any of my friends about it so thanks alot for responding

[oberon]

AMYSBOY, I hope everything goes well. I don't want to get your hopes up, but there are things that can make a women skip a period or even have a light flow. So we are all hoping you get extremely lucky.

Please come back and let us know how things are going.

Take care.

[AMYSBOY]

Can a girls period be later if she is really stressed out or is there no truth to that.

[LittleFury]

Yes it can. If a woman is stressed she might get her period late or even not get it that month. Thats the fact. However, I would still suggest you take a pregnancy test.

[demonbuttercup]

yes thats why its best to just get a test.
i don't know how you've waited this long. for me the "not knowing" is more torture.
worrying and stressing about being late can make you even later and you stress even more!!
just go get a test and put you and her out of your misery, pleeeese!!!!