about one year ago my relationship with a five year cohabitating fiance ended abruptly.
Our sex and love making was better than any I had experienced and I was 40 when we met.
She was a very skilled lover and she preferred (over all else) to do 69 with me standing over her; she laying on her back with her head over the side of the bed. It is similar to this http://www.sexinfo101.com/sp_throatswab.shtml the throat swab but with my face burried in her crotch and her skillfully deepthroating my fairly significant sized penis. Most times she would grab my butt and sort of urge me to **** her mouth or she would sort of ram me into her throat. Needless to say, I was typically fighting the urge to cum after about five minutes and when she would cum, routinely we would cum together with her greedily swallowing everydrop of me and me literally licking her clean.
Since this lover, I find myself in the catagory of men who cannot seem to cum from oral sex. In fact, over the past week during at least three sexual encounters with a wildly attractive, open minded and experimentally sexual lady...I can't cum through oral sex. I have even lost my erection despite pulling her around to where I can finger her and excite her.
I was mortified this morning, when after this weekend she was literally begging me to fill her mouth because she "had to taste me" and she sort of set it as a goal for future encounters. She even talked openly about it at dinner on Sunday night at a rest we went to. She is really a sexual being as am I. Last night, we had wildly satisfying penetrative sex all evening. I brought her to orgasm at least three times with my mouth alone. She orgasmed several times in several positions and I came twice in her pussy, hard. After falling asleep nearly exhausted we woke this morning to my having an erection after caressing her....she said "I am taking care of that before I leave for work" and immediately began sucking me which felt marvelous. She too seems to be skilled at deepthroating me (and is begging me to let her swallow) and I go soft. I was trying so desperately to fantasize and I know that it was sheer anxiety (performance)....but I could not keep it up and was mortified. This made approx. four attempts on her part in the past week to blow me to orgasm and "fail"
I feel like I am blowing it, pun intended. And I know all of the reasonable things you will say, but OMFG...And before you say it, I encouraged her to do 69 (not necessarily in the throat swab manner) and she was reluctant saying she was selfish (haha) and we needed to save some tricks for the future , so to speak???
Relax, dear. It generally takes two years before you are completely ready after such a break-up. Give yourself the time. No need to rush your full return.
try extended methods, and helping yourself a little.
she may be good, but it sounds like your ex was great.
just get used to her, and take care of yourself.
Evil has hit the nail on the head. I found myself in the exact situation a decade ago, although it was after 13 years of marriage. Had the same thing happen. Just relax as others have said. It will come back. Takes some time, but it will.
Cheers.
I really appreciated getting home from work and seeing these posts, thanks folks.
And I think you are all correct because when I think about it, sex with my last three partners ALWAYS just seemed to get better over time and I am sure that is a comfort thing.
Thanks. We just had the best chat and she suggested that "now that we know we are gloriously compatible in the biblical sense" maybe we should allow this lust to properly develop by getting to be friends and seeing where we go. WOW, she is great. 46 years old and never had a woman say say "night hot stuff" to me... :)