It kind of depends on the situation. Apparently I'm damn good at giving a blowjob and even after all this time, he's still amazed I had no one to practice on before him and pretty much just learned from porn. lol.
So, I like having that dominant role there. I like the feeling of him being helpless during that time. lol.

When it comes to the sex, my mind is much more dominant than my body seems to allow. My mind says take him, undress him, and push him onto the bed and do all sorts of naughty things to him. My body however stands there and goes "duh". So then, I somewhat come the submissive and well, I don't hate it. I want him to be on top. I want him to do things to me. I like the feeling of him doing what he wants to do to help get him off.

But then, I couldn't say I hated when I was on top and had the control. lol.

So um, I'm kinda both?
I guess a bit more dominant than submissive since that's what my mind seems to be. I just have to get my body to follow suit. lol.

I've traded off as well. Some lovers have been more dominant and some more submissive. I would just play my role either way, since they both work for me.

Although I did have an excellent boyfriend who LOVED to be dominated. I would get him all riled up and then he'd be a total animal and become the dominate one. He just liked to be submissive and bossed around at first. There was some good sex in that bedroom. *sigh* lol.

I do prefer being a BIT submissive, but don't enjoy being bossed around by anyone. lol. Just "taken".

We just trade off control... I mean whomever is feeling more aggressive that night... seems to work out pretty well.

Congrats on your prowess as a fellator...and my sympathies to you for having such a small minded boyfriend!

How the hell does a woman straddling her lover equate in anyway to "who's in charge?" ...i mean..does it feel good for you? Does it feel good for her?

I'd bet this is also a guy who never masturbates while he's in a sexual relationship!

Sorry to get on a rant here, but this guy sounds like he DOES have control issues....watch it!

[QUOTE=Quote (fixation79 @ April 17 2005,10:06)]...when it comes to oral, I'm queen. Not that I like to toot my own horn but...[/QUOTE]
I can't resist: "Just blow away!"

LOL

Interesting topic... Very often roles in the bedroom reflect roles in the relationship.

I'm not sure I'd agree that cumming with her on top is akin to giving her the upper hand in the bedroom. Of course, I'm not sure that giving her the upper hand in the bedroom is bad thing, either. (And I did resist making puns about hands.)

Sex and power are often closely related because of the "make her/him cum" mentality. Now "making" someone cum (or allowing a partner to do so) is not such a bad thing, but it also requires understanding the subtle difference between control and power. It's the mentality that also causes lots of problems because it's not logical to take 100% of the responsibility for a partner's orgasm. That's actually depriving a partner of their own power!

If I give a woman control in the bedroom, it doesn't mean a loss of power. (Actually the fact that I chose to allow that is power of itself.) It means we have decided she gets to be the leader in our mutual pleasure.

This is way to philosophical, isn't it? LOL