Okay guys i apologise in advance for any typos and any missed out caps the keyboard is not my friend tonight
Onto the real issue.
Background
I have been with my girlfriend for around a year and a half. To begin with our sex life was non existent, she was very shy and basically just not ready. Slowly this has built up, over the last few months foreplay has become a regular thing. It happened before but now I mean 3 rounds each time and every chance we get. Both Virgins FYI and fairly inexperienced
So it came to it the big FIRST TIME. Well almost....
I regularly go down on her and she says I bring her to orgasim fairly regularly without much trouble the same goes for fingering her clit. But as for penetration, I've tried it a few times and she says it doesnt feel anywhere near as good. So penetration through fingering is pretty much left out.
So tonight came to it, we had both given each other oral and hand techniques for over an hour (thats not including the afternoon session)
So we were all charged up and we both love each other so i asked if she was ready she said she was. So being turned on wasn't a problem
Yeah you all see where this is going, it didnt happen. She was far far too tight. I dont claim to have a massive penis or anything, I personaly think its just the obvious lack of penetration. We talked later and she addmitted she never penetrates herself either, which is what i feared. In the back of my mind i felt this could happen and probably would but in my defence i had my naked outstandingly beautiful girlfriend infront of me.
So my question is how do we get around this? We are both comfortable to talk openly and i suggested she tries stretching herself in the shower and i try learning how to get better results too.
Any other solutions? Before trying i managed to get 3 fingers inside her at a push and that hurt her a little she said. She said it didnt hurt enough to stop me and it definately wasnt overly painful and there was no blood. But i literally couldnt get my penis inside her.
So basically we've just got to focus on fingering penetration for a while and try again?
We both laughed and talked about it for ages afterwards so theres no hurt feelings and ive never loved her more?
So have i figured out my own problem or is there something ive missed?
And yes i realise how stupid it was to try sex without any regular penetration but at the time i didnt realise how tight and unprepared she was.
I also am trully sorry if any of the language I've used is offensive or inappropriate
As far as I can tell, it's all normal first time stuff. You may have actually just not totally found the precise opening-it's different finding it with a finger than with a penis. And the first time nearly always hurts at least a little-don't get surprised if she doesn't climax, first times often don't include climax. The most important thing is just stay relaxed about it and let be what will be. All these things will come with time and learning.
Thanks for the considerate reply
I have heard a lot of friends saying it hurt too much and had to stop but full on failing to penetrate for me was a first
What do you think are ways to solve this or is it just a case of relaxing more?
Posititon?
Was she wet enough for penetration?
How long was foreplay?
Erm just standard missionary position nothing exotic.
We'd been messing around pretty much from 2pm till 9pm on and off. Consistant foreplay for about a half hour at the very least pre trying. At least 10 minutes of penetration and yeah definately wet enough.
I think it was a mixture of her being nervous and the lack of prior penetration? Fair guess??
Solution?
Well the only time I've had this problem was when my boyfriend and I just saw eachother, and tried going at it but he wasn't all the way up (more like medium). I gave him oral sex and he became really hard and entered me easier than before. So were you hard enough?
It might be the lack of prior penetration.. if you really think it's this.. just try fingering her while you give her oral or while you're making out with her
Might be it i cant say i actually paid a huge amount of attention to myself.
Thanks for your help guys, here's hoping next time's a hit
Lets get back to the basics. Get her aroused but do NOT let her reach orgasm. You want her to be breathing fire - as it were.
Since she is a virgin who most likely still has her hymen intact - you are going to find her a bit too tight. Use condoms and lubricant and SLOWLY press your way in through the hymen. There may or may not be pain and/or blood but pay it no mind. Once in - PAUSE. Let her feel you inside of her. She has to wrap not only her muscles around you but she has to wrap her mind around the feeling of a man inside of her.
Then begin moving slowly in and out. Apply more lubricant as needed. Please make sure that you move BELOW the cervix. If you hit something that feels like bone, that's the cervix, lean over her more and think "down" so your penis slides beneath the cervix and onto the area of the posterior fornix. Caress there until she orgasms, if she does, you may orgasm at this point.
I strongly recommend that you do this twice after a short break. If she did NOT orgasm the first time you were inside of her, make sure she does this second time. You want to start the girl off right after all - so make sure she enjoys herself.
Then cuddling is highly recommended.