Dear all,
I know this is kind of a tricky thread... So first of all: I'd like to say that condoms are great: the only birth-control method that protects against STD as well!!! :) So please, don't get turned off about this thread, cause I know there are a lot of happy condom-users!
Now, I've read alot on this forum about guys not being comfortable with these little rain-jackets (and what to possibly do about it). But I just really like to know: are there any women who feel using condoms is uncomfortable/not pleasurable?
To me, it really makes a big difference to have sex with or without one (apart from interrupting and fondling with the package and stuff, that's really no problemo ;)) Without a condom his penis feels firm inside me and I can feel his soft skin moving along a bit while thrusting. With a condom it feels hard, just like it's all squeezed together in a tight package and makes it feel uncomfortable to me... I can come from shear penetration (rather easy :o), but with him wearing a condom it feels like he's just 'poking around' in there. Though I don't think he does things differently... Are there other girls who feel this way? Or perhaps someone who could give a hint/advice/thoughts about what we might be doing wrong?
FYI: I use natural family planning, so with careful calculations on my behalf, about 10 days a month we're able to have sex without protection. We don't worry about STD's; we're exclusive to each other, he's my first and he did an STD/HIV-check-up about 6 months after we started our relationship. In the 'fertile' periods, we'd need other types of protection against pregnancy. Condoms seem the cheap and easy available way.
It depends on what condoms. Certain one feel better then others. I do prefer the real thing. It feels better. I like condoms too because your guy can still cum in you and not have it all over in you after. You don't have to clean that stuff up inside you. Even thou it's good to wash after and before sex.
Much of the pleasure of sex is 'subjective' - that is not based upon scientifically measurable evidence/proof. We have only the 'idea' of satisfaction to go on. However, there are those who are allergic to latex or other chemicals used either in condoms or in lubricants. This will have an 'objective' efect upon their pleasure.
Many people, esp men, when faced with a condom, think ick so they tend to color the ensuing sex using a condom with that thought. "Yes, the sex was good but not as good as it could have been without." Instead of thinking of what sensation they do have, they focus upon what sensation they don't have.
This might be infuencing your thoughts.
Yes, I prefer without but have never noticed a really big difference. What you describe sounds like it feels a sauage rather than a penis is in you. This could be because he is thicker than many and the condom does constrain him a bit. Try some larger condoms and see how it goes.
Today, there are material choices with condoms - animal intestine, latex, polyurethane and, most recently, polyisoprene. Polyisoprene is a synthetic latex that is hypoallergenic and I do not what else has been changed. My hearing of them, on this Board, provided a challenge. Though well beyond the condom stage in life, I set out to compare, with the assistance of two male friends, how polyurethane and polyisoprene felt. Screwed more in two months than I usually do in two years! We compared, non-scientifically and completely subjectively, polyurethane and polyisoprene, two times each. We did not try latex because I had decided many years ago that I preferred polyurethane. One man did state a preference for the polyisoprene but stated, "It is still a condom." The other man thought there was no real difference. I could tell no difference and, when very aroused, barely noticed anything different from the bare which is normal with these men. We did not consider size. I simply bought them because these two men are each quite typical in size, though shaped a bit differently.
Another factor, alluded to by Evil, is the psychological. For us, sexual satisfaction does not end with the orgasm. Someimtes it goes on for nine months to the logical end! But, I do find a great satisfaction in using my vagina for what it is intended - the extraction and receipt of semen. No, I do not like the drainage, but I want to get what is coming to me. Purely psychological or emotional. With those very few men with whom I have felt an attachment, not receiving their little deposit was a disappointment. I have sometimes even had a thrill the next day in thinking that there are millions of his sperm swimming around in me.
If you are interested, try a larger diameter condom. Or, you could line up a knockwurst, bockwurst, bratwurst and blutwurst and see how each feels!
Thank you for your posts!
A sausage would very much fit the picture Brandye! It actually looks like it as well when wrapped up (hi, hi ;)) He's not that big in length, but I guess a larger diameter could be it. We've also had a 'mistake' once in which it rolled off. And that could also be the result of the condom being to tight as well (I guess)... So really, good tip and worth a shot! :)
The psychological/emotional thing could also make a difference. I do like it when he comes inside me; feels a bit like completion of the union to me :) But before getting all psychological, I first look into the physical :)
Whereas for me - condoms work!
Hey! We're talking 'getting some' here!
Now, onto more important questions like how many naked guys can I fit on a king-sized bed?
My current girl friend and past one's have told me that they don't like the feeling of a condom. Which was a shock to me at the time since it's so often men are saying that type of thing. I on the other hand still wanted to play it safe, but unfortunately I can't always say that I've have all the time with them. Heck one of my ex's use to say that if i was to wear a condom that she would not touch me lol how strange the world is.
Nice thread
I'm glad to say I have never seen a condom, that is not one used in the heat of the moment. It must be like playing the piano with gloves on.
Given a choice between the condom and an unwanted pregnancy, you may be happy to see one.
Given the choice between a condom and HIV/AIDS and other sexually transmitted diseases and infections - choose the damn condom.
Get the right kind, properly fitted, suitably lubricated with the correct lubricant and get on with it.
I swear, you guys pay more attention to, and bitch less about, proper prep work for a paint job than you do for sexual intercourse which is far more dangerous.
Thank you Brandye. Fortunately it's not a choice between a condom and an unwanted pregnancy, as many women know. I've been sexually active for 24 years and still not been pregnant. I don't actually own a bra, being a pimple-breasted Chinese woman. I was delighted to find how many men actually love it, until one told me it was like making love to a twelve year old girl. How did he know?
24 years? I get pregnant from just using his toothbrush! ;)
I guess it's like playing Russian Roulette: a few play it till they're old, but most of us find that bullet rather quickly... When pregnancy is unwanted you should protect yourself. You don't want to rely on (provoked or spontaneous) abortion, when you could prevent it? Not to mention HIV which is livable but still not curable. So people: please don't think of condoms in a bad way! It's just about finding the right fit :)
Which reminds me: few months ago -after Brandye's excellent remark- I went searching for new sorts of condoms and stumbled on the website of the Condomerie in Amsterdam. The Condomerie has classified its entire assortment of tested condoms in a measurement system, called [url=http://www.condomerie.com/webshop/casindex_uitleg.php]CAS. This gives the circumference, length and thickness of each condom. This really comes in handy when looking for a better fit! :) Sorry for (almost) forgetting to post this recommendation here.
I don't particularly like the feel of condoms,but if it means i don't get STD's ,HIV/AIDS it's worth losing that little bit of sensitivity.When living with my husband condoms were never thought of because we were exclusive,but now that we are separated when we have sex i make him use a condom because i've been with someone else and though we used protection i'm not inclined to play "russian roulette" with mine or anyone elses health
Personally I don't like the feel of condoms, just this past year i've been able to not use them because i've finally gotten on the pill. I would really dislike going back to using them, it just feels rubbery to me, and it's so much more of a turn on knowing my guy is completely bare down there.
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Fatal- haven't you been LISTENING?!?!
Condoms are NOT for the prevention of pregnancy.
Condoms ARE for stopping the exchange of DISEASES.
Most prefer condoms for protection especially if you have multiple partners:D But if you only have one, it's much nicer without a condom. :D
YOU might only have one partner...but what about your partner?
Oh your partner may only have one...now...but earlier?
With an incubation of what..10 years..are you SURE you want to take that chance?
BAREBACK ISN'T WORTH DYING FOR.
[QUOTE=EvilEvilKitten;260264]Fatal- haven't you been LISTENING?!?!
Condoms are NOT for the prevention of pregnancy.
Condoms ARE for stopping the exchange of DISEASES.[/QUOTE]
Jeez, ok... I guess i made it sound like i have sex with random guys without a condom, which is completely unsafe. I have only not used a condom with one person, my current boyfriend who i plan on being with for quite a long while.
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Yes but does he plan on staying with you.Or does he have a bit on the side that you don't know about.My husband and i never used condoms because we didn't look outside our marriage for anything or anyone else.But my most recent boyfriend cheated on me with his ex whom he told me he had finished with.So i'm glad i made him use a condom,even though one time it broke,and i had a pregnancy scare,but it turned out to be menopause.LOL
[QUOTE=EvilEvilKitten;260300]YOU might only have one partner...but what about your partner?
Oh your partner may only have one...now...but earlier?
With an incubation of what..10 years..are you SURE you want to take that chance?
BAREBACK ISN'T WORTH DYING FOR.[/QUOTE]
True EEK! But: Huh? What is the 10 years about?
According to Sensoa (Belgian organization for sexual health) and Aids fonds (Dutch HIV fond) whenever there's suspicion or "risk" of HIV/STD you can get tested about 6 weeks after the event. HIV is a bit more tricky than other STD's; it could take up to 3 months for your body to generate antibodies (and therefor takes 3 months to give a reliable answer on testing).
So, the urgent advice is: whenever you and your partner decide to get exclusive, you should get tested for HIV and STD's before you go bare. A 6 months checkup is advisable, especially whenever you have unprotected sex (so no matter if you're married or any relationship in which you've decided to stay exclusive)
Actually; I requested my bf to do these tests before we had (penetrative) sex. I did have some emotional barriers, so it took me a while to be able to be intimate. But after the results of the tests were ok, it also became clear how much this fear for health-issues had added to holding back on surrendering to pleasure and truly enjoying sex. I must admit that after this "good start" had soothed my mind, we never did the 6 months check-up... Let's say I try my best to take good care of myself, but that does not mean I do everything right.
I'm all for condoms. Having a sexually transmitted disease, unplanned pregnancy or an abortion (I'm pro-choice, but I chose not to have one) are just not on my to do list.
I do find that I need to use a lot more lube when I use condoms than I do now that I am in a long term, exclusive relationship.
Yes lola,i'm finding that i have to use condoms & heaps of lube now because i have started menopause & pregnancy is not an option for me at almost 44.Like you i am pro choice,i used to be anti abortion till i had to have one 20wks into my 2nd pregnancy due to my little baby boy having an extremely severe genetic abnormality.I don't want to go through anything as traumatic as that again as i actually had to go through the whole birthing procedure
[QUOTE=EvilEvilKitten;256431]how many naked guys can I fit on a king-sized bed?[/QUOTE]
I like the way you think!
Raunchy, I am really sorry to hear that. It must have been very traumatic for you.
In my last post it should have read 'I choose not to have one' rather than 'chose'. Also I seem to have left off the end of my last sentence, it should have been: "
I do find that I need to use a lot more lube when I use condoms than I do now that I am in a long term, exclusive relationship and we're no longer using condoms, just the BCP."
Thanks lola,i'm currently in between relationships,although there is someone in the US i met on internet who wants to get with me.I still have sex with my estranged husband,and even though he had a vasectomy after our 3rd son was born,i still rather he use condoms as i've been with someone else since we separated.I ought to go on birth control but i don't know how i'll go what with being on anti-depressants and considering hrt for this blasted menopause
Time to get to a doctor Raunchy! I know people who are on anti-depressants and the pill without any probs, but you need to talk it through with your doctor :).
Are you using condoms with your ex-husband? I really hope so!
I use condoms and even incorporate dressing him up in them in the foreplay. Think about it. Hot and steamy, sliding all over him, tantalizing and then a delicious pause....will she....won't she...is she reaching for one? He sees me carefully ripping op the packet with my teeth, slowly, taking it out, slowly, sliding back over to him.....and....and...and???
LOL